CHAPTER 221: CHAPTER 220: BOND BEYOND LIFE AND DEATH

Chapter 220: Bond Beyond Life and Death

The new challenge for the competition had left various emotions from the trainees. Others may sigh in relief but only those who were picked to do ’Romance’ have dark clouds looming above their heads all day long. Even with the time of practice, they still couldn’t find themselves to do it without any embarrassment of goosebumps feeling on their skin.

Inside a training room, Nan Moyi and Qin An are inside and watching the track and choreo for their duo performance.

"Through this journey

No matter else we collide

We can as long as we have each other’s back..."

When the video ended, Nan Moyi turned to his partner and was about to ask something when he noticed the look on the young man’s expression. There was a mixture of confusion and indescribable feeling that he couldn’t understand.

"Qin An?" Nan Moyi called him.

The young man seems to come back from his senses and turn his eyes on him, fully revealing a trace of doubt on the young man’s eyes.

"Nan Moyi, I don’t think I understand the song well. How deep can a relationship grow like this?"

Nan Moyi paused and looked at Qin An with a hint of surprise.

If it were before, Qin An would have probably stayed silent. The young man had always been like this, refusing to take the initiative to speak his thoughts inside the team and just merely accepting other’s ideas for him. He will just nod and do what he was told to. Even when he became the leader from the past performance, he was somewhat passive.

Only did he fully understand that amidst the young man’s seemingly intimidating aura like a superior lies someone who’s just lost in life.

Like a child.

Like a child? Nan Moyi was amused by his thoughts. Qin An is obviously someone who’s been ’above’, how could he associate himself to a ’child’? He wanted to reject that thought but when he saw the ignorance in the young man’s eyes, he fell in silence.

"Nan Moyi?" Qin An called for the young man who didn’t answer him. To his surprise, Nan Moyi suddenly exhales a loud breath and raises his hand to put it on Qin An’s head.

"??!!" Qin An froze, stiffly feeling the young man’s palm rubbing his head carefully. Because he slowly became accustomed to Han Suwen’s closeness to him, he really didn’t reject anyone coming for him slightly. Others like Shen Lou had always been with him too so when Nan Moyi suddenly took this move, he just stiffened but didn’t move away.

However, it’s just that Nan Moyi also looked at him gently and his gaze made him stiffened even more.

Why does he feel like there’s something going wrong with what the latter’s eyes are on him?

But before he could comprehend what it is, the latter finally speaks.

"Relationships aren’t actually just about the bond between blood." Nan Moyi told him. "Sometimes even without it, the connection can go deeper than anything else." Seeing that Qin An looks interested, Nan Moyi continues his words.

"First, we can talk about the relationship between blood ties." Nan Moyi knew that the latter became an orphan so maybe his understanding between families isn’t that deep. Looking at his eagerness that looked so much the same as his younger siblings, his voice softened even more.

"Families have stronger connections due to their blood ties. It’s something that you have after you are born in this world. In my case, I was fortunate to be born in a family where they valued each member. My parents taught me how to live with dignity and respect to everyone that I’ll meet. With my younger siblings ahead, I think what I have is something that anyone hoped for." Nan Moyi has a smile on his face as he recalls his family. Even when their parents died, his relationship with his siblings just became deeper due to the hardships that they faced together.

But of course he wouldn’t generalize his experience to what others have because many don’t have this life. Thus after telling Qin An about the greatness inside a blood connection called family, he switched to the other one.

"The other one is something that may be too rare to have these days, a connection between individuals who have no blood relationship— friends and even lovers." Nan Moyi smiles again and pat the young man’s shoulder. "Like something you have with us or more especially to Shen Lou, He Yan and Han Suwen whom you had the best relationship with."

"It’s called friendship."

Qin An tilted his head slightly. "Then is friendship what the song means?"

"I prefer it to be called a bond beyond life and death."

Now his words piqued Qin An’s attention even more. Mentioning life and death is not something that you usually say in a casual manner even with this topic. Since Nan Moyi describes this as like that, does that mean that the relationship that he’s talking about is way deep, right?

"Friendship is something that you have with others whom you share memories with. Like having someone you have with your happy and sad moments in life. A companionship. However, this song isn’t just about an uncomplicated relationship like this." Nan Moyi showed the lyrics of the song to Qin An and explained some of the lyrics that conveys stronger emotions than just having a friend.

"A connection like this is may even stronger than blood relation, Qin An. Sometimes you are more willing to sacrifice something to others— even between life and death." A flash of melancholy appeared on Nan Moyi’s eyes. "My parents often told me that they had comrades with them who sacrificed themselves not just to the country but also to their own comrades in the military. There are always situations like this in their lives until they themselves also do that."

"..." Qin An remained silent and just listened to the young man’s words. He lowered his eyes and it landed in his own hands. He spread his fingers together and clenched it, feeling the pulse on him, indicating his identity as a human.

A bond beyond life and death? If such relationships go that deep, wouldn’t it also mean sacrificing like what Nan Moyi told him?

The mentors once told him that being an idol is not just about executing your skills perfectly but you must also have an empathy inside your heart. To express all the emotions that a human could have and dive towards them to express a song— to convey a message.

So Qin An has to understand what he must feel to immerse himself for this performance. But just from the latter’s words, does he have someone like that?

He may have friends in this world but does he have someone whom he can even sacrifice with?

Qin An sighs. He thinks since becoming a human, endless thoughts just formed inside his mind. He always fell into confusion, doubt, and hesitation about everything that he couldn’t understand. Or even when he had a feeling, he couldn’t grasp it well.

He felt helpless about the feeling of knowing but drowned in confusion again. And it seems like it’s just repeating. Earlier he had realized it but after just a second, he will be ignorant again.

Being a human is really exhausting.

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