Chapter 1626 - 700: Film Emperor Lin - Deities Are All Just My Food - NovelsTime

Deities Are All Just My Food

Chapter 1626 - 700: Film Emperor Lin

Author: Missing You Washing Red Beans
updatedAt: 2025-08-30

CHAPTER 1626: CHAPTER 700: FILM EMPEROR LIN

A thin mist pervaded the courtyard, with two decapitated bodies lying on the ground, their eyes wide open in eternal shock, enhancing the terrifying atmosphere.

Filming a Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio movie here would be truly immersive. Even before the ghosts appear, one would already be drenched in cold sweat.

"Sister Fish, tell another one!"

Brother Overcoat urged. He genuinely hoped Hua Yue Yu’s jokes could keep her alive, so everyone would know what to do.

"Sister Fish, who understands such artsy jokes?"

Classmate Zhou was speechless: "Do you think this monster has heard Tang poetry? Your jokes require some cultural literacy; otherwise, they won’t understand at all!"

Walker, Holkina, and Qiu Shankui didn’t understand and were completely baffled.

"Right, right, go with something fierce!"

Brother Overcoat realized and nodded vigorously: "Drive over its face with a car wheel."

As a female streamer, Hua Yue Yu, even if she was once an innocent and pure girl, had long been corrupted by her online followers.

Hua Yue Yu was not oblivious to dirty jokes; she just felt too embarrassed to say them in front of Lin Baici, as it would make her seem vulgar and unrefined.

"Small Fish, your mindset is off, treat this monstrous tree as one of your followers. You’re live streaming, and you need to make it a fan!"

Gu Qingqiu suggested.

Exhale!

Hua Yue Yu took a deep breath: "Last week, during class, the teacher who teaches Marx asked us, what’s the similarity between a rotten radish and a pregnant woman?"

"A classmate said, both are messed by worms!"

"Teacher Ma Zhe nodded and gave him 70 points!"

"Then there was someone in our class who scored full marks, do you know what her answer was?"

Hua Yue Yu grinned mischievously.

San Miyairi thought for a moment, the worms answer seemed perfect, right?

Hua Yue Yu dared not wait longer and revealed the answer after three seconds: "Her answer was, because it was picked too late!"

The Little Merperson lived up to her name as the top figure on the Seafood Platform. The joke itself wasn’t very funny, but combined with her expression, tone, especially her pretending to support a girl’s butt with her hands and thrusting her hips twice forward, was just too hilarious.

Even though the situation was tense, Brother Overcoat, Classmate Zhou, and others chuckled despite themselves.

Walker exaggeratedly exclaimed ’wow,’ finding it thrilling to hear such a joke from a cute beauty.

"You could perform manzai on stage now, ah, that’s what you would call stand-up comedy in the Nine States!"

San Miyairi couldn’t help but smile.

Gu Qingqiu nodded.

Making people laugh is a talent; like some famous comedians, they don’t need to say anything, just standing there makes the audience start laughing.

"Oh no, it didn’t laugh!"

Hua Yue Yu was distressed; she’d gone all out but failed.

Just as Hua Yue Yu was contemplating whether to up the ante, the three cracks resembling eyes and a mouth on the tree trunk bent into a smile.

"Hahaha!"

The Old Locust Tree was delighted, its branches trembling, and leaves fluttering down.

"It seems to have worked, right?"

Everyone looked at Hua Yue Yu, their expressions apprehensive.

One second!

Two seconds!

A minute passed, and Hua Yue Yu’s neck had not twisted behind her, clearly passing the challenge.

"Brother Overcoat, it’s looking at you now!"

Classmate Zhou reminded.

"Haha!"

The Old Locust Tree chuckled wickedly, with its three cracks obviously directed at Brother Overcoat.

Gulp!

Brother Overcoat swallowed a mouthful of saliva.

"Tell a joke! Tell a joke!"

Brother Overcoat muttered, but his mind was a mess, and even if he told a joke, it would be so stuttered that it couldn’t make anyone laugh.

[When the monstrous tree makes a certain facial expression, you must find a way to make the Old Locust Tree experience that mood to pass the challenge!]

[For instance, if the monstrous tree laughs, you must make it laugh; if it cries, then make it cry.]

[If you can’t do it, the person under the Old Locust Tree’s gaze will have their neck snapped by an invisible Tree Ghost.]

Eater God commented.

Lin Baici understood that Chen Shaolian died from contamination because he wasn’t funny enough, and Eater God’s words implied that anyone could ’perform.’ If they couldn’t evoke the corresponding emotion in the monstrous tree, the person targeted would die.

"Hurry up!"

Classmate Zhou urged: "Aren’t you always the one who livens things up?"

"I... I..."

Brother Overcoat suddenly found that under the pressure of death, let alone livening things up, he couldn’t even speak properly, proving that Sister Fish was truly great in her live streaming efforts.

"Bite the lighter!"

Hua Yue Yu saw Brother Overcoat’s bewildered state, realized he was done for, and quickly reminded him.

"Right!"

Brother Overcoat nodded vigorously: "I’ll perform biting a lighter for you!"

Brother Overcoat took out a plastic lighter from his pocket, one of those sold on the roadside for five cents, placed it in his mouth, and bit down with his teeth.

Crunch!

The lighter shattered, then with a bang, it exploded, splattering half of Brother Overcoat’s face with blood.

"Oh crap!"

Brother Overcoat cried out, covering his face with his hand.

He didn’t expect his luck to be so bad to bite and explode a lighter, but soon his frustration faded because the mess and blood-covered look made the Old Locust Tree burst into laughter.

Brother Overcoat indeed looked comically pitiful.

Walker and Holkina laughed too, proving they were deriving their pleasure from others’ miseries.

"Hehe!"

Brother Overcoat wiped his face: "I’ll perform a driving test for you!"

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