CHAPTER 295: NUMBED

Irene and Xuan Che stared at each other in tense silence.

After about half a minute, the little doll finally glanced at the scattered items Xuan Che had laid out and asked softly, “That’s it?”

Xuan Che’s expression twitched slightly, his century-cultivated heart nearly shaken, yet he still bravely nodded. “Indeed, that’s all.”

Yu Sheng sighed gently and stepped forward to comfort him. “It’s okay, you tried your best.”

“Ah, my abilities truly fall short,” Xuan Che sighed, a look of dejection appearing as he began packing up his things. “There might still be a solution; I just can’t grasp it now. Once I return, I’ll ask Master or perhaps consult the elders behind the Door. Maybe they’ll have some insight.”

Yu Sheng nodded sincerely. “Then we’ll count on you.”

By the time this discussion concluded, noon had approached.

Naturally, Yu Sheng invited his guest to stay for lunch. He didn’t worry whether a cultivator from Thousand Peak Spirit Mountain needed to eat or not—after all, Xuan Che had already chugged down a whole can of cola, and besides, he had a cultivator at home who practically inhaled food at every meal.

Xuan Che didn’t hesitate to accept the invitation. In fact, he was somewhat curious about how these beings, clearly not “human” yet earnestly imitating human ways, spent their daily lives. Staying for a meal thus took on a sense of adventurous discovery.

He’d soon realize his choice to stay was indeed eye-opening.

Because Foxy was cooking.

Perhaps excited by finally having a guest from a similar realm, Foxy eagerly volunteered to prepare lunch, determined to show this local immortal a taste of authentic cuisine from her homeland.

Yu Sheng’s initial instinct was to intervene. After all, he knew the “Fox Stew” dishes had grown increasingly eldritch in recent attempts—setting down a bowl of rainbow-colored squirming matter was bound to shock their guest. Worse yet, if Xuan Che panicked and drew his sword to battle their lunch as if it were some demon spawn, it’d make for an awkward afternoon. But Yu Sheng failed to stop her.

Because Foxy grabbed his hand and wagged her tail earnestly.

“You really spoil her,” Irene’s original body grumbled from atop the dining table, looking at Yu Sheng with resignation. “Anything she asks, you give. Anything she wants to do, you approve. You know her cooking is growing more unsettling every day. Soon, she’ll open that kitchen door, and lunch will walk out carrying her instead.”

“Not that bad, not that bad,” Yu Sheng hurriedly waved his hand, defending earnestly, “She endured a harsh life for decades; I just want to treat her well now. And haven’t I been good to you too? You’ve got four new bodies already.”

Irene rolled her eyes. “If you hadn’t built them out of cheap dime-store materials, maybe I’d believe you.”

Xuan Che remained curiously focused on the kitchen door. With the door closed, his usually penetrating Divine Sense was oddly blocked here, leaving him completely in the dark. He could only hear periodic clangs, hisses, flashes of fiery explosions, and bursts of bright light. Honestly, it didn’t sound much like cooking—though calling it trench warfare felt exaggerated.

After hesitating for some time, he finally looked up at Yu Sheng. “This…is cooking?”

“It’s a specialty from Foxy’s hometown called Fox Stew,” Yu Sheng cheerfully explained. “The noises are normal. She’s probably just negotiating with the ingredients. Once they reach an understanding, the dish will be ready.”

Xuan Che stared blankly. “…?”

Yu Sheng added cautiously, giving a friendly warning. “By the way, when it comes out, it might look slightly alarming, so brace yourself. It might not look appetizing, but I promise the flavor is good. Besides, for cultivators like you, it’ll probably have beneficial effects.”

Xuan Che’s curiosity only intensified. Just as he pondered how startling a dish could really be, the kitchen door swung open.

Unintentionally, he swept the scene with his Divine Sense.

Instantly, he was greeted by the blinding spectacle of a blazing nine-tailed flame, so intense it was impossible to gaze upon directly. Within that fire, fierce energies roiled, surging like a cauldron of molten light as Foxy carried it forward.

Xuan Che recoiled immediately, pulling back his Divine Sense in shock. He watched as a large, lidded pot was set down onto the table. Yu Sheng rose to help Foxy remove the lid, and amidst billowing steam, something else rose gently upward.

Bewildered, Xuan Che peered cautiously into the pot.

His Dao heart trembled violently.

After several frozen seconds, he turned slowly toward Yu Sheng, eyes wide and voice dazed as though dreaming. “It… it greeted me.”

Yu Sheng pondered briefly before nodding thoughtfully. “Then it seems today’s stew has good manners.”

Xuan Che stared back, speechless.

[Is this stew about to ascend and take human form?!]

Yu Sheng sat in quiet puzzlement, watching as Foxy hurriedly served up dinner, scooping portions from the steaming pot while murmuring softly: “One bowl for Benefactor, one bowl for me; one bowl for the guest, another for me; one for Irene, and the pot’s for me…”

“Eat up while it’s hot,” Yu Sheng urged the handsome young man across from him, a gentle smile on his face. “The taste really isn’t bad.”

But Xuan Che hesitated, eyes fixed upon the bubbling bowl in front of him. A few solemn words echoed in his mind—Master’s orders. Within the swirling, strange broth, he thought he glimpsed something familiar drifting: his Master’s Copper-Headed Belt.

His master’s words resounded clearly, full of solemn wisdom: “Xuan Che, remember clearly. The one you visit today is a great Eminent One who once overcame Dark Angels. Beside such a mighty figure, the strangest wonders must dwell. Be brave, be careful. Should he offer you anything, accept—it might be a grand destiny.”

Xuan Che clenched his jaw, gathered his courage, and took one spoonful from the bowl into his mouth.

Across the table, Yu Sheng noticed his guest suddenly freeze with a very peculiar look, as though struck by revelation.

After half a minute of silence, Yu Sheng could no longer hold back. “Is something wrong? Not to your taste?”

Xuan Che jolted awake, face even stranger than before. Struggling for words, he finally muttered, “It… surpasses my alchemy.”

Yu Sheng blinked in confusion. “…Huh?”

Xuan Che was already too absorbed, taking another spoonful. Each mouthful brought vivid memories flooding back: scoldings from misremembered recipes, punishment kneeling from misjudging hours, beatings for mismanaging flame timings.

Gazing down at the strange substance in his bowl, Xuan Che pondered a single mystery—[How could something so potent look so… unusual?]

Then something shining caught his attention. Two majestic, radiant creatures of golden brilliance hopped gracefully onto the table, leaping down from Foxy’s shoulders to peck at their tiny bowls of “stew.”

He couldn’t recognize the divine species, but their aura felt even stronger than his Master’s immortal cranes—though their eyes were oddly unsettling.

Yu Sheng warmly introduced them. “These two are Plain Boiled and Salt Baked, Foxy’s pets.”

Xuan Che paused, glanced at the Nine-Tailed Fox now happily lifting the entire pot to her mouth, and forced himself to smile stiffly. “…Very good names.”

Yu Sheng awkwardly laughed, considering whether to explain their true species, but a sudden loud pop interrupted him.

Immediately after, the living room television fell silent, kitchen lights dimmed to darkness, air conditioning ceased its hum, and even the refrigerator became quiet.

Irene, who had been sitting cross-legged on the table, gave a startled squeak—“Eek!”—and tumbled straight off the edge!

Yu Sheng jumped, quickly catching Irene mid-fall, only to find her dazed and wobbly. Then came a crashing noise from the living room, sending a chill of dread straight through his spine. Without another word, he bolted toward the sound.

He froze at the scene before him: another little doll sprawled beside the TV stand, smoke curling from her charred hair, next to a badly exploded power strip.

Yu Sheng stared dumbfounded for a moment before rushing to the little doll’s side, nearly pulling his hair out. “You actually went and chewed on the wires?!”

The burnt Irene shakily lifted her soot-covered face and defiantly raised a tiny middle finger.

As Yu Sheng stood bewildered, another Irene popped up from between the sofa and the coffee table, glaring angrily. “You’re chewing wires! Your whole family chews wires! I’m not an idiot!”

Yu Sheng pointed at the smoking doll on the ground, utterly perplexed. “Then what’s this?”

“What happened?” Irene snapped, her tiny voice fuming. “Ask the cheap power strip you bought! I was just watching TV when the stupid thing started smoking. I tried to unplug it and the moment I grabbed the wire—BANG! Didn’t even have time to dodge! Now I’m all numb!”

Yu Sheng suddenly felt a deep embarrassment replace his frustration. He vaguely remembered Irene complaining just days ago about the cheap socket and urging him to replace it. [Ah… I completely forgot.]

Feeling guilty, he gently scooped up the smoking Irene, carefully wiping soot from her face with a tissue. Just as he opened his mouth to offer some comfort, Irene suddenly twitched, pushing his hand away. “Wait.”

Yu Sheng blinked. “What now?”

Irene (Pro Max Black-and-Gold Smoke Limited Edition, 66.6 cm) moved her arms experimentally, then hopped down, staring curiously at herself.

“…I’m charged.”

Yu Sheng stared blankly, lost for words. “…You’re what?!”