CHAPTER 98: OPERATION: DON’T DROWN IN CAVE JIZZ

Finn and Seraphina plummeted into the collapsing hole—swallowed whole by the trembling ground.

Seraphina had reached out in desperation, her hand outstretched toward Ardin.

But Ardin...

Ardin had stepped back.

Just enough to avoid her grasp. Just enough to save himself.

Her eyes widened in disbelief as she tumbled past him, falling into the dark void with Finn.

The light above faded fast.

Screams echoed as the abyss swallowed them.

"AAAAAAAAAHH!!" Seraphina shrieked in pure terror.

Finn opened his mouth—He didn’t want to scream. He really didn’t.

But he also didn’t want to go insane in freefall.

So.

"AAAAAHHHHHHH—WE’RE GONNA DIEEEE—AAAAAAAHH!!"

His limbs flailed like a dying swan trying to swim through molasses.

Until—

Boing.

His hand landed somewhere. Soft. Round. Springy.

Finn blinked mid-fall.

’...Wait. Was that...?’ His brain, in the middle of imminent death, focused all processing power on a single fact:

He had just touched her holy orbs. The sacred spheres. The divine domes.

His soul achieved momentary transcendence.

Seraphina gasped at the contact but didn’t fully register what happened in the panic. All she knew was she felt something solid—someone—and her survival instincts kicked in.

She lunged toward the warmth she felt.

Toward Finn.

"Grab my hand!" Finn shouted.

Their arms collided midair. Hands fumbled. Fingers locked. And for a moment—

In the black void—

They held on to each other like it was the only thing left in the world.

Above them, the distant light of the cavern mouth shrank to a pinprick.

Their friends... the mission... the chaos...

It all vanished into the distance.

Only darkness remained.

And then—

SPLASH!

They hit something below. Not solid. Not ground. But slime.

Cold. Wet. Gloopy.

***

They slammed onto the slime with a wet splat—Only to immediately start sliding.

It wasn’t solid. It wasn’t safe. It was like being dipped in oil and tossed onto a greased-up water slide.

A very long, very dark, very terrifying water slide.

They whipped through the pitch-black cavern, faster and faster, slime coating their entire bodies. Every bump, twist, and turn sent them lurching, screaming, and sliding with no end in sight.

"WE’RE GONNA DIE IN SLIME!!" Finn howled, arms flailing wildly.

Seraphina, absolutely terrified, clung to him like a lifeline—her entire front pressed against his back, including her holy priestly blessings, which nearly gave Finn a spiritual awakening mid-slide.

His brain instantly rebooted.

’FOCUS. MUST PROTECT. MUST. NOT. ENJOY.’

He tightened his grip around her, arms locking her in like a seatbelt of horny determination. His eyes squinted, trying to make sense of the void around them, but it was no use.

There was nothing but darkness.

And the relentless sound of slime sloshing beneath them.

Then, without warning—

The ground beneath them vanished.

"OH COME ON—"

WHOOSH.

They were airborne. Again.

Weightless.

Suspended in darkness.

Falling once more into the unknown...

***

The world went blurghghgh—as they submerged in thick goop.

Moments passed in bubbling muffled silence...

Then—

"PUAHHH—!!" Finn broke through the surface, slime dripping from his hair and hat. "Okay, okay, we’re not dead—BUT I’M COVERED IN CAVE JIZZ, THIS IS SO NOT COOL?!"

Seraphina burst up next to him, coughing and gagging. "Where—where are we?! What is this?!"

They floated in a vast underground chamber. Dim green-blue bioluminescence lit the enormous cavern. Strange spiked crystals jutted from the walls.

"I don’t know?! Why the hell do you think I know where we are?" Finn snapped, still trying to keep his head above the disgusting goop.

Seraphina opened her mouth to respond but paused. "...Fair point."

There was a beat of silence. Just the wet, squelching sounds of them treading slime-water.

"...But yeah," she finally muttered, glancing around. "Where the holy are we?"

They were floating awkwardly in what could only be described as viscous swamp water infused with expired Jell-O—thick, chunky, and deeply upsetting. Every movement felt like swimming through old yogurt with the occasional mystery lump brushing past their skin.

Finn grimaced. His shoes were completely soaked. Socks too.

This was war.

Then, realization hit him like a freight train of anime clichés.

He blinked slowly. They were separated from their teams. Alone. In a cave.

With just the two of them.

’Oh my god... I understand now.’

This was it. The character development arc. The classic "lone boy and lone girl survive together in a dungeon" trope.

He had seen this in so many anime.

He knew what he had to do:

Keep her safe.

Be strong.

Survive together.

Maybe hold hands and blush later.

’Epic,’ he thought.

But first—he needed to get out of this unholy stew.

He glanced around, scanning the slime-pool from hell until he spotted something promising: a raised patch of land in the distance. Solid ground. Hope.

"There," he said, pointing.

"W-Where are you going?" Seraphina asked, clearly panicked.

"Follow me," he grunted, already breast-stroking through the chunky mess like a man on a mission. He didn’t want to know what was under this water. He didn’t want to know what touched his leg just now. And he definitely didn’t want to learn what a "slime leech" was.

Seraphina followed behind reluctantly, both of them flailing awkwardly through the muck like lost toddlers in a kiddie pool filled with pudding.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity of gagging noises and internal screaming, they reached the land and crawled out, coated in gunk.

Wet globs of slime clung to their bodies, sliding off in slaps and squishes. It was like exiting a birthing canal made of glue.

Seraphina dropped to all fours and immediately started coughing, gagging, and wiping her mouth like she’d just downed a gallon of expired mayonnaise.

Finn stood up and started violently shaking his legs, trying to free them from any slime that might’ve crawled up his pants.

Wherever they were now, it was barely lit, smelled like fermented sadness, and sounded like something was breathing nearby.

Finn looked around.

"...This isn’t good."

And this was probably only the beginning of this long journey for the two of them...