"Buuurp~~~"

Bullhorse let out an astonishingly long belch.

Before him stood a small mountain of food containers and various liquor bottles.

"You didn't spend all the money, did you?"

Liu Zheng frowned.

"Of course not. This is all leftover food and drinks, dirt cheap. Want some? There should be a bit left in the kitchen."

Bullhorse was being somewhat considerate.

"No need for that."

He shook his head.

The system categorized them as non-items, so eating them would be useless.

If not for the item effects, who would ever eat these dark culinary creations?

That half-eaten raw marinated fat maggot Bullhorse just consumed was thicker than his tentacles.

"Speaking of which, after you snatched that bottle of Vlad III last time, the kitchen staff still sell you leftovers?"

"No eternal enemies, only eternal interests. It's not like I didn't pay. Besides, who else would help them move product?"

Bullhorse swayed his head smugly.

"The kitchen should have procurement staff, right?"

"They do, but they can only go to fixed locations. Not like us deliverymen - we can go anywhere as long as we deliver on time."

Bullhorse said proudly.

Liu Zheng pondered thoughtfully.

It seemed each of the three positions had their own advantages and disadvantages.

If he joined the kitchen, the benefit would probably be access to cheap food.

As for being a server, the advantage would likely be receiving customer tips.

"Could you get me another bottle of red wine then?"

He asked.

"No can do, no can do."

Bullhorse shook his head like a wind-speed dog.

"Like I said, it's limited edition. You think it's tap water or something?"

"I didn't mean Vlad III, something inferior would work too."

Liu Zheng said.

"What, planning to gift it to that tree?"

Bullhorse instantly understood.

"Yes."

"Psycho, you think that tree is something good? You treat it as a friend, it treats you as food."

Bullhorse sneered.

"What about you then?"

"At worst I'd only beat you to death, and if I'm in a good mood I might even find you a prime feng shui burial spot so you can reincarnate as a bullhorse in your next life."

Bullhorse declared righteously.

"It eats what it eats, I thank what I thank - no conflict there."

Liu Zheng remained stubborn.

Without the "Emergency Ration," they would have earned half as much money.

"Dammit, you humans are so pretentious."

Bullhorse grumbled as he went out.

After a few minutes, he called.

"No red wine available, but I've got a case of Maozi. Want it?"

"Maozi?"

"That Ascension Maotai you drank last time, but this is fifteen-year aged."

Bullhorse said.

"I thought they only sold leftovers?"

"This entire case got contaminated, has to be disposed of."

"If it's contaminated, why the hell buy it?"

"You can't drink it, but that tree probably can. Only 10,000 for the whole case - where else can you find Maozi this cheap?"

Bullhorse said.

"Alright then, front the money first, I'll pay you back."

Liu Zheng thought for a moment.

After a while, Bullhorse returned carrying a case of liquor.

Opening the case revealed six exquisitely packaged liquor bottles.

However, the originally pure white porcelain bottles were now saturated with colorful stains.

Just looking at them for a few moments made him feel dizzy.

"Name: Fifteen-Year Ascension Maotai Liquor (Contaminated)"

"Type: Item"

"Quality: Fine"

"Effect 1: Gain 'Drunkenness' status"

"Effect 2: Gain 'Bliss' status"

"Effect 3: Gain 'Hemolysis' status"

"Can be taken out of dungeon: Yes"

"Note: Pain is pleasure, hell is heaven, praise the Supreme Bliss Celestial."

"Drunkenness: Player's spirit and perception temporarily decrease, strength and constitution temporarily increase, immune to some mental attacks."

"Bliss: All player sensations are converted to pleasure, pain-converted pleasure is doubled."

"Hemolysis: Player's blood gains strong corrosive properties."

Holy crap, one bottle of this would take you straight to blissful death.

Liu Zheng's eye twitched as he read - this stuff was even more sinister than black goat offspring eyeball sashimi.

"What exactly contaminated it?"

He asked.

"Don't know, something went wrong during smuggling apparently." New ɴᴏᴠᴇʟ ᴄhapters are published on novel-fire.ɴet

Bullhorse shook his head.

"Smuggling?"

"Duh, if it came through proper channels, they'd just return it. Wouldn't be available for you to get cheap."

Bullhorse wore an expression that said "you ungrateful brat."

"Oh. Can I return it then?"

Liu Zheng asked.

"Sure can."

Bullhorse nodded.

"Huh?"

"You return it yourself."

"Tch."

He should have known.

After some more idle chatter, the ghost hand reached in.

Unsurprisingly, it gave Liu Zheng the middle finger again.

"Little rascal, quite persistent."

He smiled.

Then while Bullhorse wasn't looking, he grabbed a bottle and stuffed it into the ghost hand's grasp.

"Hey!"

Bullhorse immediately shouted.

"How much kickback did you get on that case of Maotai?"

Liu Zheng turned and asked.

"Mmm, these chicken feet are quite tender."

Bullhorse lowered his head and kept eating.

He turned back to see the ghost hand raising the liquor bottle to him three times before withdrawing.

"What's that mean? Meet it after third watch?"

Liu Zheng was baffled.

"Means it wants three more bottles."

Bullhorse interjected.

"Really?"

"Fake."

"Heh."

He mentally gave Bullhorse the middle finger.

But it might be worth trying - he had money now anyway.

"Boss, save three bottles for me."

Liu Zheng said.

"You actually believe that? Fine."

These were all inferior quality liquor anyway - all together they weren't worth as much as the kickback from that Maotai case.

"Duh, if it came through official channels, they'd just return it. Wouldn't be available for you to get cheap."

He picked up the delivery order.

"All yours."

Bullhorse pretended to be generous.

He was already considering grabbing his bucket and running away, naturally lacking work enthusiasm.

"Alright."

Liu Zheng shrugged.

He wanted to test the legendary delivery box's effects anyway.

Checking the delivery order contents:

"Food: Garlic Rice·Go Brain Flower portion"

"Address: Jiahe New Residence Community, Building 7, Unit 1503"

"Time limit: One hour"

Liu Zheng checked the map - about four kilometers away.

Plenty of time.

He shouldered the delivery box, rolled up the Maotai and a black bag, and left the break room.

Opening the food container on the delivery cart, garlic-scented steam immediately billowed up.

Beneath a thick layer of garlic sauce lay a purple-red ellipsoid covered in short tentacles.

It appeared to be still alive, the tentacles swaying back and forth in some kind of rhythm.

Liu Zheng almost thought he heard some kind of "buzzing" murmuring in the air.

"Rationality decrease exemption successful."

The system prompt suddenly rang, snapping him back to awareness.

"Holy crap, looks like another tough customer."

He used two tentacles to block his ear canals, then looked at the item description.

"Name: Garlic Rice·Go Brain Flower"

"Type: Item"

"Quality: Fine"

"Effect: Small probability of gaining 'Telepathy' ability, small probability of gaining 'Mind's Ear' status"

"Note: Red-headed Mi-Go·Freddie, murmuring in the dark night."

"Can be taken out of dungeon: Yes"

"Telepathy: Player gains ability to communicate mentally with others, ignoring language and racial barriers."

"Mind's Ear: Player can hear sounds that normal people cannot perceive."

"Really is a tough customer."

Liu Zheng sighed.

While the telepathy ability sounded tempting, the Mind's Ear effect could be fatal.

What good sounds can normal people not hear?

If normal people can't hear it, can it really be good sounds?

Especially in this bizarre world - the legendary armor works fine during delivery, but on the return trip after delivery, he'd probably lose rationality all the way.

This brain - whoever wants to eat it can have it.

Liu Zheng shook his head and walked toward the dark passageway.