Hogwarts, i am Dementor
Chapter 256 255: Get Out! Or I'll... I'll Take Off My Robes!
Naturally, Dumbledore's incredible skill could perfectly conceal Sirius Black's memories, and Dumbledore even specifically erased the part about "Cohen replaced a Dementor" from Sirius's memory, just in case Veritaserum made Sirius spill any secrets.
Meanwhile, on the other side, as Fudge left the castle, Cohen casually snagged a Dementor to take his place.
Fudge was a bit of a petty fellow; Cohen hadn't seen any sign that he planned to withdraw the Dementors from Hogwarts grounds.
But that didn't concern Cohen anymore – the conflict with Fudge now only involved Dumbledore and Sirius...
So Cohen quietly told that group of Dementors, "You can go back now."
Heh, Dementors don't talk anyway, and the Ministry higher-ups were currently a bunch of slackers afraid to change anything, so they wouldn't dare abolish the Dementor division.
Besides, this stunt would definitely make things tricky for Fudge. Within the hour, the sudden withdrawal of the Dementors guarding Hogwarts was bound to attract reporters, and then Fudge would have to deal with journalists badgering him with questions like, "Oh dear, the Dementors have left, does this mean you've caught Sirius Black?"
Returning to the castle in his human form, Cohen circled back up to the eighth floor, carrying his trunk, and headed back to Dumbledore's office.
Sirius and the "fake Peter" had already been taken away by Professor McGonagall.
"Cohen, you've come at the right time," Dumbledore said to Cohen. "Perhaps Sirius could be housed in your trunk? Or perhaps the Room of Requirement? So as not to interfere with normal teaching activities, though of course, I lean more towards the Room of Requirement."
As for why Cohen's trunk wasn't suitable, Dumbledore shot Cohen a look that was quite the hint.
It seemed Dumbledore's relationship with him was getting a little... out of line.
"You're the Headmaster," Cohen said, pressing his lips together. "Are you really asking me for permission to use the Room of Requirement?"
"That particular room seems to exist quite on the fringes of Hogwarts," Dumbledore said, chuckling softly. "Even I can't get into it frequently."
Cohen, of course, knew exactly why – he and the Earl practically occupied that room all the time, so of course Dumbledore couldn't get in.
But even if Dumbledore was hinting, it wasn't going to work – Cohen would at most let Sirius stay there for a week. After the trial was over, Cohen would go right back to hogging the place.
"Dumbledore, so old and still fighting kids for toys, hasn't he any shame...?"
"Oh, right," Cohen said, after agreeing to house Sirius in the Room of Requirement, mentioning something about outside the school. "Fudge didn't take all the Dementors with him. It's like he doesn't care at all that they'll affect the students."
"It's not surprising that Fudge would do that," Dumbledore said.
"But I had a word with that lot of Dementors," Cohen said with a little snicker, "and told them to go back to Azkaban."
Dumbledore chuckled lightly too – perhaps not because of Fudge, but simply happy that Cohen was able to do something good for the school and his fellow students.
—
"Alright, dog-man, you'll stay here from now on."
Inside the Room of Requirement, Cohen said to Sirius.
Cohen had brought the Earl out of the Room of Requirement beforehand, allowing the room to transform its appearance again.
It looked like a single dormitory room.
"Don't call me that," Sirius snorted, a puff of air escaping his nose.
"How about 'human-dog'?" Cohen asked.
"Don't just mash two words together and pretend it's a new one!" Sirius said, covering his face. "Is that what Edward taught you?"
"Are you very close with my dad?" Cohen asked suspiciously. "He was a Hufflepuff—"
"We weren't exactly close back in school," Sirius said cautiously. "I knew him back then because he gave presents to all the girls in Gryffindor – only later did I find out he was trying to win over Rose back then..."
"That's quite embarrassing too," Cohen said, his face serious. "You mean you weren't very close back in school... you got close after you graduated?"
"Because we were both with Dumbledore, fighting You-Know-Who together," Sirius said. "He was quite capable and upright, just a bit lazy – that's why I was surprised when I saw him that day, why he would adopt..."
"Am I some kind of awful child?" Cohen said fiercely. "You won't get a Christmas present this year, and I'm going to go tell Harry right now that his godfather is actually involved with a wagging dog in Hogsmeade—"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa—don't tell Harry that—" Sirius quickly reached out to cover Cohen's mouth, but Cohen dodged fast – he was far too dirty, and only Professor McGonagall and Harry would touch him without a second thought.
"You actually went for it, huh?" Cohen said disappointedly. "I thought you could control your urges..."
"You little runt..." Sirius sighed, a look of pure exasperation on his face.
Cohen was clearly just messing with him, having fun at his expense – just like the original four [Marauders] used to mess with their classmates back in their day.
"I'll leave you to it. I need to head back to the common room to catch up on sleep. If you're hungry, sneak into the kitchens to eat," Cohen said. "Also, take a shower. Harry will probably want to find you tonight."
"Be serious for a second. Don't look at me with that 'concerned about my rear' look," Sirius said, sitting down on a chair in this new bedroom. "I'm Harry's godfather."
"Makes it even more likely now," Cohen said thoughtfully. "You've never dated—"
"That's because—because—"
"And James is all you think about. You were even calling out James's name to Harry in the Shrieking Shack..."
"James and I were friends!" Sirius instantly decided to chuck Cohen out – every second this kid spent near him felt like mental torture. "Get out, get out—"
"I haven't finished my brilliant deduction yet," Cohen said. "This concerns Harry's future upbringing—"
"Get out now, or I'm taking off my clothes!" Sirius said fiercely. "I'm planning to shower here."
No sooner had he spoken than a bathtub full of hot water appeared in the room.
"Alright, you played dirty."
Cohen covered his eyes, turned his head, and hurried out of the room.
That's so 'dog-like'! To resort to such tactics to resist!
After leaving the Room of Requirement, Cohen returned to the common room.
Harry and the others were there, chatting and catching up on Sirius's situation. When they saw Cohen come in, Harry immediately brightened up.
"Cohen! What did Professor Dumbledore say? Is Sirius's situation sorted?" Harry asked eagerly.
"The trial is next weekend. Dumbledore is taking care of it, no need to fret," Cohen said. "Sirius is staying in the Room of Requirement right now. You can go talk to him if you need to – but don't tell any of the other students."
"So I can go now—"
"Not right now," Cohen said, stopping Harry's eager rush.
"Why?" Harry asked, confused.
"He's shirtless at the moment. But if you want to see him, you can just burst in," Cohen said, stroking his chin. "That scene would definitely be... intense."
"That scene would definitely be awkward," Hermione said.
"That would be ghastly," Ron muttered, clicking his tongue.
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