Up in the sky, accompanied by the rumbling of the engine, Kasenhis began explaining his travel itinerary to everyone.

"We'll first head to the Netherlands. It's just across the sea from England. We can go there and try out Dutch beans versus Chinese beans and see which tastes better. Then we'll swing by France to grab some croissants, and maybe stop in Spain to see if we can bring back some ham."

"After that, we'll fly straight to Italy. I want to find out if eating pineapple spaghetti pizza with iced Americano on the streets will actually get me punched. Once we're done with Italy, we'll move on to Greece, Croatia, Switzerland, and Germany—basically a full tour around Europe. Finally, we'll head to Romania, toss Lupin over there, help him sign the contract, and then we can go home and relax."

Sitting in the back, Harry slowly raised his hand. "Professor, why aren't we just going straight to Romania? Why take such a huge detour?"

"Because the Ministry of Magic pays our travel allowance per day. The more fun we have, the more Galleons we earn," Kasenhis explained.

"Wow! How much does the Ministry give us per day?" Harry asked.

"Three hundred Galleons."

"...Shouldn't we also swing by Asia for a bit? It's not that far anyway?"

"No can do. That'd take too long," Sirius said, counting on his fingers and shaking his head.

"Doesn't seem that tight on time though?" Harry asked, confused.

"No no no, this year we happen to be just in time for the Quidditch World Cup. I bought tickets… very expensive ones."

Kasenhis glanced back at Sirius. If even he said they were expensive, then they must've cost a fortune—though that probably went without saying.

"Shouldn't we shorten the itinerary a bit then?" Harry asked, a little worried he might miss the Quidditch World Cup.

"No need to worry. I just did the math—if we stay three days in each country, the schedule works out fine. Unless, of course, this plane suddenly falls apart and throws us straight into the Bermuda Triangle," Sirius said, rambling nonsense.

Sitting in the pilot's seat, Kasenhis said stiffly, "Lupin, be a dear and land a couple solid punches on that stinky mutt in the back."

Lupin clicked his tongue. "That's not very nice…" But his hands didn't stop moving. He undid his seatbelt, turned around, and gave Sirius two solid punches.

"..."

"Pfft.. You okay?" Harry asked, trying not to laugh but feeling that it wouldn't be very polite. So he opted for pretending to be a decent person, at least for now.

"I'm fine," Sirius mouthed back at Harry. As he spoke, he unbuttoned his coat, revealing a stash of Men's Style magazines—every issue from 1992.

Sitting up front, Kasenhis listened to their murmuring and glanced back. Then, puzzled, he reached out and took one of the magazines. He could've sworn this magazine wasn't published until 2004… how had it come out so many years early?

"Uh… is it really okay to read this kind of thing while flying a plane?" Sirius asked awkwardly as he handed Harry a copy, then passed one to Lupin, and finally noticed the one in Kasenhis's hand.

"I totally understand you guys, but can you not corrupt Harry? That magazine is still a bit too spicy for a thirteen-year-old sprout like him," Kasenhis said, snatching the magazine that had turned Harry beet red and casually tossing it onto Lupin.

"Uh… Professor, I think…" Harry started awkwardly.

"There are two main quests in life, you know what they are?" Kasenhis ignored him and asked instead.

"What?"

"Eating and lewd stuff," Kasenhis replied seriously. "And from the looks of it…"

He turned to glance at Harry. "You've probably had enough to eat by now."

Harry flushed even deeper at Kasenhis's vague yet blatantly suggestive words.

"I get it. Boys your age—who doesn't keep a few 'skimpy dressed mags' stashed under the bed? Totally normal. Just… could you at least read that stuff behind your professor's back next time?" Kasenhis said with a long-suffering sigh, like a concerned parent.

Harry suddenly had a flash of inspiration. "Do you want a look?"

Kasenhis's expression stiffened. "What do you take me for? I read alchemy journals! Lupin, give Sirius two more punches—for setting a bad example for the blooming flowers of the magical world!"

After Sirius received two solid punches this time, Kasenhis, feeling it would be unfair to scold one and not the other, and not wanting Harry to sit around bored during the long trip, reluctantly pulled out an alchemy journal from his ring and handed it to Harry. "If you're bored, read this instead."

After receiving the journal, Harry glanced at its size, then looked at the remaining magazines inside Sirius's coat. Without hesitation, he grabbed one at random, stuffed it into the alchemy journal, and began reading.

Up front, Kasenhis turned back to glance at him.

Seeing Harry staring at the book without blinking, he nodded in satisfaction. That level of focus was impressive—already at the realm of "in books, one finds beauties." Still, it wasn't quite enough.

After all, true alchemy masters really could achieve "golden mansions in books"… as in, literally conjuring gold by hand.

Content, Kasenhis kept flying and began humming a tune. After a while, he glanced back again.

Harry was still sitting there diligently reading the alchemy journal, looking utterly absorbed.

His face was even flushed.

"Harry, are you feeling sick?" he asked casually.

Harry touched his face—it really was burning. "Pretty warm. Do we have air conditioning?"

Kasenhis shook his head. "I'm just a humble alchemist, not some high-tech engineer. Of course there's no such fancy thing as air conditioning." As he spoke, he reached his hand out toward Harry.

Just as Harry instinctively clutched his book tighter, a bunch of square ice cubes suddenly dropped from Kasenhis's hand like they were coming out of an ice maker.

"Whoa, perfect! I brought some whiskey!" Sirius excitedly pulled a bottle and a glass from his pocket, dropped in an ice cube, poured himself a drink, and was just about to take a sip—when he remembered the one currently driving and keeping everyone alive.

"You first!" He shoved the glass toward Kasenhis's mouth.

"Nope." Kasenhis refused, glancing at Lupin and nodding approvingly—no drinking while flying, no flying while drinking.

Lupin: Very good.

The next second, Kasenhis betrayed Lupin's trust: "I installed an automatic liquor cabinet on the plane." As he spoke, he pressed a button on the central console and said, "Whiskey on the rocks."

Almost instantly, a robotic arm handed him a glass of whiskey with ice.

The two in the backseat were dumbfounded. Harry was silently wondering—with such badass tech, is it really that hard to make air conditioning?

Meanwhile, Sirius wore an expression of pure envy. Voice-controlled mobile liquor cabinet? Bloody hell, that was stupidly cool.

"...Are you sure it's safe to fly this thing while drinking?" Lupin finally asked the one and only rational question in the entire plane.

Kasenhis gave him a speechless side-eye. "You kidding? I'm a seasoned pro!"

The very next moment, in broad daylight, a bolt of lightning struck the two propellers of the aircraft squarely.

_________

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