CHAPTER 41: THE LOAF THAT BROKE THE MAN II

The ground didn’t just shake—it roared, like the earth itself had eaten bad tacos and was ready to revolt. The donut fountain wobbled, spraying frosting like a sugary geyser. The crowd scattered, screaming, as cracks spiderwebbed through the cobblestones. I stood there, still glowing, wondering if I’d accidentally summoned an earthquake with my Loaf powers.

"Cecil!" Lilith snapped, grabbing my arm. "What did you do?"

"Nothing!" I protested. "I just made a donut! A big one, sure, but—"

A massive claw burst from the ground, followed by another. The cracks widened, and up came the ugliest creature I’d ever seen: a hulking, doughy beast with crusty scales, baguette-like spines, and eyes that glowed like overbaked cookies. It roared, spraying crumbs everywhere, and I swear it smelled like burnt toast.

"BEHOLD!" it bellowed. "I AM CRUMGOROTH, SPAWN OF THE YEAST VOID, SUMMONED BY THE LOAFBEARER’S HUBRIS!"

Vorren stepped forward, cracking his knuckles. "Right. Time to punch some bread."

Jex hid behind a barrel. "I told you eating that loaf was a bad idea!"

Mister Fog floated up, sipping his tea calmly. "Fascinating. It’s a gluten demon. Weak to water and self-doubt."

I raised my hands, feeling the Loaf’s power surge again. "No problem. I’ve got this." I pointed at Crumgoroth, and—ZWOOM!—a barrage of croissants shot from my fingertips like a buttery machine gun. They slammed into the beast, sticking to its crusty hide like delicious shrapnel. It staggered, roaring, but didn’t fall.

"Nice try, Loafbearer!" it sneered, swiping a claw that sent me skidding across the square. My ribs screamed, but the Loaf’s energy kept me upright. I rolled to my feet, grinning like an idiot.

"Alright, Crumby," I said, "let’s see how you handle this." I clapped my hands, and a massive rye loaf materialized above the beast, dropping like a meteor. THUD! Crumgoroth flattened under it, letting out a wheezy oof that smelled like stale sourdough.

The crowd cheered. A random merchant shouted, "Get him, glowing guy!"

Lilith sighed, pulling her scythe. "You’re enjoying this way too much."

I was. The Loaf’s power made me feel like I could bench-press a castle. I summoned a pair of baguette nunchucks and charged, spinning them like a discount ninja. Crumgoroth swatted the rye loaf aside and lunged, but I dodged with unnatural speed, landing a solid WHACK across its snout. Crumbs flew. The beast howled.

Vorren barreled in, tackling Crumgoroth’s leg and sending it stumbling into a fruit stall. Apples and oranges exploded in a juicy cascade. Jex, ever the opportunist, started lobbing dinner rolls from his stash, each one bursting into tiny clouds of flour on impact.

Mister Fog waved his hands, summoning a shimmering mist that smelled suspiciously like burnt sugar. "Begone, yeast fiend!" he intoned, and the mist coiled around Crumgoroth, making it sneeze violently. Sneeze-sneezes, mind you, that sprayed doughy globs everywhere.

I was about to summon another loaf when my stomach gurgled again. Not the earlier rebellion—this was different. Deeper. Like the Loaf was trying to send me a bill for all this power. My knees wobbled. My vision swam. And then, without warning, my bones felt like they’d turned to jelly. Not literally, thank gods, but close enough. I collapsed in a heap, baguette nunchucks clattering beside me.

"Cecil!" Lilith shouted, slicing through one of Crumgoroth’s spines with her scythe.

"I’m fine!" I lied, flopping like a sad pancake. The Loaf’s power was still there, buzzing faintly, but my body was staging a full-on strike. "Just... need a quick nap."

Crumgoroth loomed over me, its cookie-eyes gleaming. "PATHETIC MORTAL! YOUR BODY CANNOT CONTAIN THE LOAF’S MIGHT!" It raised a claw to squash me into next week’s bread pudding.

Before it could, Lilith leaped onto its back, scythe flashing like a guillotine on a bad day. "Not today, toast-face!" She carved a chunk out of its shoulder, sending a spray of doughy bits into the air. Vorren grabbed the beast’s other leg, twisting it like he was wringing out a wet towel. Jex, screaming something about "soup supremacy," chucked his last roll, which exploded into a cloud of flour that temporarily blinded the monster.

Mister Fog floated above, chanting in a language that sounded like a recipe read backward. A wave of shimmering water—yep, actual water—crashed over Crumgoroth, soaking its crusty hide. The beast shrieked, its body softening like a bagel left in the rain, and collapsed into a soggy heap.

Lilith landed beside me, panting. "You’re an idiot."

"But a living idiot," I wheezed, still sprawled out.

Vorren hoisted me over his shoulder like a sack of overconfident flour. "We’re getting you home before you summon a pie dragon or something worse."

Jex scurried after us, muttering, "I’m never eating bread again."

The manor was a welcome sight, its crooked roof and slightly haunted vibes feeling like a hug after the day’s chaos. Vorren dropped me onto the kitchen floor, where I lay like a deflated soufflé. Lilith kicked open the door, and Mister Fog floated in, still sipping his endless tea.

That’s when I heard her voice.

"Cecil Dreggs, what in the seven hells have you done this time?"

Yvra Bororo stood in the doorway, arms crossed, looking like she’d just walked out of a royal portrait and into my disaster of a life. Her dress was pristine, her expression a mix of fury and exasperation, like she was debating whether to slap me or hire someone to do it for her.

I propped myself up, still jelly-limbed. "Yvra! Fancy seeing you here. Come to admire my new title? Loafbearer, at your service."

She stepped closer, looming over me. "I came to tell you the King’s doubled your bounty again. And to make sure you don’t ruin my family’s name any further."

Lilith smirked. "Too late for that."

I grinned weakly. "Yvra, stick around. I’m just getting started."

She sighed, long and suffering, but didn’t leave. And as my crew bickered around me, I felt the Loaf’s power flicker in my chest, promising more chaos to come.