I Only Care About Making Money And Not Love. I'm The Best Professional Simp!
Chapter 99 - Has Crown Prince Lu Gone to the Crematorium to Chase His Wife Today?
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"Are you okay?"
Wang Zhenzhen stared with concern at Wei Qingyu, who had been reading a book beside her.
Goddamn it!
What a sin!
Fate is truly unpredictable.
When Lu Xing liked Wei Qingyu, Wei Qingyu didn't accept him.
But when Lu Xing gave up on Wei Qingyu, Wei Qingyu miraculously fell in love with Lu Xing?
Damn it!
Wang Zhenzhen felt that art truly comes from life. The story of these two was much more interesting than a novel.
"I'm fine, Zhenzhen. Thank you for your concern."
Wei Qingyu closed the book in her hand and looked at Wang Zhenzhen with some gratitude.
If it weren't for Wang Zhenzhen chattering in her ear about sensibility and rationality, she might still be going in circles about why she liked Lu Xing.
Being thanked so suddenly by the flower on a high mountain, Wang Zhenzhen felt a little embarrassed!
She scratched her head. "It's nothing. The most important thing is that you've recognized your own heart... huh?"
Wang Zhenzhen's words came to an abrupt halt. She widened her eyes, staring in shock at the cover of the book in Wei Qingyu's hand.
On it was written—An Analysis of the Internal Logic of Romantic Relationships.
Wang Zhenzhen: ???
Holy f*ck!
Huh?
What the hell are you reading?
She had always thought Wei Qingyu was reading some academic book, or at the very least, an extracurricular book.
After all, when Wei Qingyu read, she was always so serious.
No one had told her that Wei Qingyu was reading this kind of thing with such a serious expression?!
"Why are you reading this?!"
Wei Qingyu looked at Wang Zhenzhen's shocked expression with a dazed look. "Is there some kind of prerequisite for readers of this book?"
Uh...
Wang Zhenzhen was suddenly stumped.
There was no prerequisite, it just felt a little too terrifying for Wei Qingyu to be reading this kind of book!
Wang Zhenzhen scratched her head. "I just feel like you reading these books is a little OOC."
(TL: OOC = Out Of Character.)
Hearing this, Wei Qingyu took out a few more books from her drawer. "What about these? Can't I read these either?"
"Also, what is OOC?"
Hmm?
Wang Zhenzhen glanced at the books Wei Qingyu had taken out.
Can AI Have Emotions?
[[100 Little Things About Love]]
[[How to Cultivate and Nurture a Precious Love]]
[[A Compendium of Love Confessions]]
Wang Zhenzhen was dumbfounded.
Holy f*ck!
How is the title of each of these books more explosive than the last!
She really couldn't imagine Wei Qingyu reading a compendium of greasy love confessions with such a "flower on a high mountain" face.
Fuck!
Lu Xing, you brat, your sins are truly deep!
Give me back my otherworldly flower on a high mountain, ahhhhh!
Wei Qingyu didn't get an answer for a long time. Thinking that her books weren't useful enough, she asked sincerely.
"Zhenzhen, I've never been in a relationship before. Do you have any books to recommend to me?"
"I'll take reading notes and write a review to give to you."
Wang Zhenzhen: ...
What kind of proper person needs to read and study before falling in love?
But Wei Qingyu felt that her behavior was very normal.
"When you encounter something you don't understand, you need to study more and have a large amount of input."
Wang Zhenzhen held her forehead. "You're not an AI! Why do you have to gain experience through a massive amount of learning materials?"
"Besides, the books you're studying are completely out of touch with reality!"
Out of touch with reality?
Wei Qingyu looked at Wang Zhenzhen with a dazed expression and asked with a thirst for knowledge, "Then what kind of books are in touch with reality?"
Wang Zhenzhen showed a mysterious smile, took out five books from her schoolbag, and slapped them on Wei Qingyu's desk.
"Read this! This is in touch with reality!"
Hmm?
Wei Qingyu looked over. The covers of the books were basically a man and a woman kissing.
[[Sweet Pampering! Has Crown Prince Lu Gone to the Crematorium Today?]]
[[The Madam Runs Away with the Ball, Mr. Gu Sees Red and Begs for Forgiveness]]
[[After the Contractual Divorce, the Crown Prince of the Capital Circle Regrets It!]]
(TL: Wang Zhenzhen is one of us?)
Reading these book titles, Wei Qingyu fell into a silence.
After a long while.
She suddenly said.
"Do I really have to be sent to the crematorium?"
"Do I pinch Lu Xing's waist, or does he pinch mine?"
"I regret it, but I never had a contractual marriage with Lu Xing. What should I do?"
Wang Zhenzhen: ...
Blind student! You've found the critical point!
But after Wang Zhenzhen's demonic guidance...
Wei Qingyu really did feel that her feelings for Lu Xing were clearer.
So this time, she still chose to believe Wang Zhenzhen.
But thinking of Lu Xing's conversation with Li Dachun this morning, she asked another question.
"Zhenzhen, can I ask you about a word?"
Wang Zhenzhen patted her chest. "Just ask. I've been on various novel websites for many years. What word don't I know?"
Wei Qingyu was relieved and asked very sincerely.
"Can you tell me what '1' is? Why did the sports committee member say he is a '1'?"
Huh?
Holy f*ck!
Wang Zhenzhen was shocked!
Oh my god!
I've stumbled upon a huge melon!
(TL: This is an hard joke to understand. Li Dachun was talking about the Engel coefficient, he was talking about food.
In Chinese LGBTQ+ slang, particularly within the gay community, numbers are used to denote sexual roles:
1 : Refers to the "top" or the insertive partner in a male-male sexual relationship.
0 : Refers to the "bottom" or the receptive partner.
0.5: Refers to someone who is "versatile."
Wang Zhenzhen being "cultured" as she is knows these slangs and thinks that Li Dachun is saying that he is gay and likes to be on top.
As for the Melon it's a slang for gossip, as the people who laze around and gossip or watch it unfold eat melon seeds.)
...
For a whole afternoon–
Li Dachun felt a gaze from somewhere sizing him up.
He even looked at the back door and the window in horror several times, thinking it was the homeroom teacher, Li Juanfang, peeking.
But unfortunately.
It wasn't.
Li Dachun was really confused. Who on earth was secretly looking at him?
If you have the guts, look openly!
After Li Dachun told Lu Xing about this feeling, Lu Xing said with a smile.
"That depends on whether it's a man looking at you or a woman looking at you."
Li Dachun scratched his head. "How so?"
"If it's a woman looking at you, you can get ready to get out of being single."
"If it's a man looking at you..."
Lu Xing didn't finish his sentence, but Li Dachun got it and furiously punched the air.
"If it's a man looking at me, he must be jealous of my muscles!"
"He must be trying to secretly put milk tea powder in my protein powder!"
"No! I have to carry my protein powder with me recently!"
Lu Xing: ...
Kid, you're invincible.
Guaranteed to be single for a lifetime!
After saying a few more words to Li Dachun, Lu Xing picked up his schoolbag and left the school.
When he saw the Bentley not far from the school gate...
He knew it was Auntie Wen who had come personally again.
Sigh.
Actually, he had thought about it carefully later. Auntie Wen was a pretty good person.
Beautiful, rich, and without any strange quirks. And she didn't delay paying her wages!
And among all the clients, she was the only one who cooked for him.
Auntie Wen just didn't trust him.
That was all.
Back then, Auntie Wen would rather say she was a widow than say that Nannan was not her biological child.
From this, one could see that in her heart, Nannan was really important.
Lu Xing was still grateful to Auntie Wen. Before he discovered the surveillance, he had secretly enjoyed the warmth of a home for a few days.
Investigate if you want. For a person like Auntie Wen, to have endured until now to investigate his background was a miracle.
As a professional simp, he absolutely could not show a long face to the client during work hours.
Lu Xing took a deep breath, showed a sunny and cheerful smile, and walked towards the Bentley.
Click.
He opened the car door.
Lu Xing smoothly sat in the passenger seat.
A second before Auntie Wen spoke, he pulled out a rose from behind his back like a magic trick.
"CEO Wen, Happy April Fool's Day too!"
...
...
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