CHAPTER 269: DO YOU HATE THE IDEA SO MUCH?

"How much did you hear?" Kade asked after another long pause. Before moving on to try to figure out how to handle it, he had to find out whether Felix had been able to overhear EVERYTHING that was important... Or maybe he was just trying to delay the inevitable conversation, it was hard to tell.

Regardless, Felix answered bluntly, "From a while before you started discussing the mating ceremony that you were allegedly planning to have with me, all the way until my father suggested you should return to the pack house."

"Oh," Kade went silent, rubbing the side of his neck bashfully. Because of everything that had been said afterwards, he had kind of forgotten about that part... But he had indeed declared that he was going to marry Felix. Without Felix’s knowledge and approval. He threw the Omega a furtive glance...

However, to his surprise, Felix appeared perfectly calm. Serious, of course, because the topic they were discussing was no laughing matter, but not angry, or disgusted, or displeased, or anything. Not even reproachful.

His heart skipped a beat. He had said that to Wilder only to show that he had no intention of letting Felix go - which he didn’t, but it was also because Felix himself clearly didn’t want to go to the Moonhill Pack. If Felix wanted to... Then Kade wouldn’t stop him. He would just have to do his best to follow him, since he had no intentions of giving up on his future cute little mate - but even if Felix understood that, it was unusual for him not to shoot Kade down instantly. Normally, he wouldn’t even take it as a joke. So, if he wasn’t getting angry or anything, could Kade take it as a good sign? Perhaps...?

"You were thinking that, since I had two fated mates at the same time, I might be able to bond with you again through the mating ritual, even without breaking my bond with Jared, right?" Felix asked, his eyes on the head of the fox he was stroking, as he tried to avoid looking at Kade, too self-conscious to even take a glance at his face. "I admit that it’s an... interesting idea, but it wouldn’t work long-term."

"And why is that?" Kade pressed his lips, trying to hide his excitement. The fact that Felix was even considering it made him unbearably happy, making him forget about his earlier defeat, at least for a while!

"Well... If I am bonded with another Alpha, then it’s possible that I might be able to finally break my bond with Jared. That’s what you had in mind, right?"

"...Right."

He hadn’t. Actually, Kade hadn’t thought that far. It had crossed his mind that he might be able to form another bond with Felix through the mating ceremony, since they had been fated mates before, but it was just an idea that suddenly popped up in his mind. He hadn’t had time to properly consider it, and there was certainly no evidence that might support it. He wasn’t going to expose himself about it now, though.

Luckily for him, Felix was still stubbornly staring at the fox, and hadn’t noticed the hint of guilty conscience in his expression. "Right," he nodded his head, picking his words carefully. "Let’s say we do it, and it works. But... Then what?"

"Hmm? What?" Kade tilted his head.

"If I can’t break the bond with Jared because I have no other mate, then once that bond is severed, I might not be able to break my bond with you... And while I might be able to be bonded to more than one person at the same time, there’s no telling whether you will be able to do the same. Even if we were to have our mating ceremony in secret, without anyone else’s knowledge, besides maybe your parents, of course... If you weren’t able to bond with another Omega in the future, it would cause you problems..."

The room went silent. So silent, that it seemed even quiet than ever before. Felix chewed on his lip, wanting to look up to steal a glance at Kade’s face, but at the same time, not daring to do it...

"...Do you hate the idea of being my mate so much?" Kade asked eventually. Although Felix still couldn’t see his face, the tone of his voice was so hollow, that it made his heart instantly drop...

"That’s not it!" he rushed to deny it. "That’s not it at all... I..." He bit his lip again. Honestly, he didn’t know how he felt himself. Was he not attracted to Kade? Sure, he was! Did he not care about Kade? He couldn’t say that he didn’t... Did he dislike Kade? Well, the Alpha was annoying sometimes, but he couldn’t say that he did...

But there was also Remi. And while Felix still didn’t know what to do with the fox, and planning the future with him seemed impossible, for obvious reasons... His feelings toward this fox of a witch weren’t exactly platonic either. So, how could he give any answer to Kade, when his feelings were such a mess?

Besides, that wasn’t even the only reason. Even without Remi, there was one very important factor that made him want to keep a distance between himself and Kade. He took a deep breath to calm himself down, and said,

"You’re the heir to the Bloodmoon Pack. And I... don’t want to be a Luna. I don’t want to be the Luna of a medium-sized pack, and most certainly not of a supreme pack. That’s... not the right place for me. I’m not suited for the position, and I don’t want to do it either."

For a long while, Kade didn’t say anything. So long, that Felix couldn’t take it any longer, and finally forced himself to steal a glance...

And their eyes met.

Felix stared into those deep, purple black eyes, that were looking back at him intently, even forgetting to breathe. It was only when Kade spoke up again that he managed to snap out of it.

"I... understand," Kade said with difficulty, his voice strained. "I... don’t want to force you to do anything you don’t want. But... I’m not the leader of the pack yet. Anything can happen. So, for now... Can we forget about my position a bit?"