CHAPTER 50: DON’T LOVE HER... LOOK AT ME INSTEAD

Rosalia — POV

I had been so full of myself—so consumed by my own emotions—that I completely failed to notice how pale Rosalia’s skin had become, or how unnaturally flushed she looked.

All I could think about was refusing to let this girl hate me.

Refusing to hear even a single word of hatred directed at me.

Because I couldn’t bear it.

I simply couldn’t.

So when I pinned her down, forcing her to repeat what she had said earlier...

I expected her to snap back, to yell that she only reacted that way because I had angered her.

I expected denial, maybe irritation.

But instead—

She looked straight into my eyes with a gaze overflowing with love and desperate attachment, and said:

"I...I love you—so please... don’t love her. Look at me instead..."

Everything inside me froze.

Before I could process her confession, her body went limp.

She collapsed.

She fainted—her breathing heavy, her face burning red with fever.

"Damn it."

I had let my emotions take over and completely overlooked Rosalia’s condition.

"Damn it, Cassel. How can you be this stupid?"

I cursed myself as I adjusted her limp body in my arms, placing her carefully across my lap. She looked so small like this—too small, too fragile.

"Rosalia... Rosalia, wake up."

I patted her cheeks, shook her lightly—but she didn’t respond.

She’d been fine just minutes ago.

Is this... the backlash from using her healing power on Henry?

I thought her power was different from Mary’s—since last time, she didn’t collapse like this.

In my previous life, when the zombie virus infected Cecil and Mary healed him, she spent days bedridden with fever and sickness afterward.

I’m such a damned idiot. I should’ve realized sooner.

I should’ve seen how pale she looked, how shaky her breath had become.

"I’m sorry... Rosalia, I’m so sorry."

I pulled her feverish body against my chest, feeling her burning through my clothes.

Then I pressed a soft, trembling kiss onto her forehead.

"I love you. I love you to the point of madness. I nearly lost my mind when you said you hated me. I’m sorry. I can’t help clinging to you—I want to invade you, possess you entirely. This obsession I have for you... It’s like nothing I’ve ever felt. You’re the only one I ever loved in both my lives. I’ve never felt anything for anyone else."

My voice cracked.

"I’m sorry... forgive me."

I held her like that for a long time, listening to her uneven breaths, the soft whimpers slipping through her fever.

I considered calling a doctor...

But no doctor could heal this kind of supernatural backlash.

Medicine was useless.

All I could do was wait.

And pray her body didn’t give out.

"Rosalia..."

...

"Boss, we’ve reached the borders of City B. If we drive for less than an hour, we can enter the security base."

Robin’s voice cut through the suffocating silence inside the vehicle.

Henry sat beside him, silent and pale.

Reez and Frederick were behind us.

Frederick hesitated before asking quietly, "Boss... should we enter directly, or wait for Miss Rosalia to wake up?"

The car fell silent again.

Reez shot Frederick a sharp glare, and he shut up instantly.

Silence...

It had become the new normal.

Ever since Rosalia fell unconscious—sleeping night and day for four whole days—the air around us had turned cold, heavy, suffocating.

We had been traveling nonstop.

Fighting zombies, clearing roads, losing people along the way.

Two cars broke down.

One exploded after a fight inside it.

Some got bitten and died.

Others lost their minds and attacked their own team.

So much happened while you slept, Rosalia.

Shouldn’t you wake up now?

Please... please wake up.

I feel like I can’t hold on anymore.

At first, I reassured myself.

She’d wake up within two days.

Three, at most.

But her coma dragged on.

The worst part—her temperature kept rising.

Her fever was so high I feared her brain would fry.

Medicine didn’t work.

Cooling cloths didn’t work.

Food and water...I was barely able to feed her by the mouth-to-mouth method.

Nothing worked. These past days were the most terrifying, horrifying days I have ever lived through.

Not even the moment I was being eaten alive by zombies felt this empty... this paralyzing.

I was never afraid of facing death.

Not even when I blew myself up.

But now...?

I looked down at my hands—hands that were holding Rosalia—and realized they were trembling, almost imperceptibly.

I had somehow managed to hold myself together during these past days through sheer force of will.

But every second that passed without seeing those beautiful grape-colored eyes open... pushed me closer to the edge.

Closer to losing my mind entirely.

I think... I actually killed a man who stood in our way a day ago.

It wasn’t that he didn’t deserve it—he was a murderer, a criminal, and he held a child hostage.

But if I were in my normal state, I never would’ve chosen to reveal my power like that...

I never would’ve torn him apart limb by limb in front of all those people.

What is happening to me?

What should I do?

"Boss, it’s okay. Rosalia is strong—I’m sure she’ll be fine. Let’s get to the base and rest. When she wakes up, we’ll surprise her."

"Boss, have some snacks. Henry, you too—you barely ate these past days."

Liz’s expression tightened with worry as she glanced at Henry, who sat motionless by the window.

Even though everyone else was worried about Rosalia too, the two people who had changed the most—the ones who were affected the deepest—were undoubtedly Henry and me.

How ironic.

Just four days ago, I wanted to fight Henry, beat him bloody for daring to hug Rosalia.

But now, looking at his disheveled, hollow appearance...

I couldn’t bring myself to feel anything but pity.

Because I knew—my own appearance was probably even more miserable than his.

"I’m not hungry," Henry murmured, looking like a ghost.

Even the sly fox looked dead inside.

"Let’s head to the safe base and get settled first. If Rosalia doesn’t wake up by then, we’ll search for someone with healing abilities and try them."

But I barely heard their voices.

My entire focus was on the burning girl sleeping in my arms.

Wake up, Rosalia.

Wake up... before I lose my sanity completely.