Chapter 286 - 286 - You Thought You Won, But Actually You Lost Big - Konoha: The Thirty-Year-Old Uchiha Can’t Be Bothered - NovelsTime

Konoha: The Thirty-Year-Old Uchiha Can’t Be Bothered

Chapter 286 - 286 - You Thought You Won, But Actually You Lost Big

Author: Euridome
updatedAt: 2025-09-02

The Hokage office was packed, clans whispering among themselves. Off to the side, arms crossed, Uchiha Izuna stood alone, scanning the crowd for his big cousin Gin—only to realize the man had disappeared.

Then, cutting through the murmur of shinobi talk came a jarring, familiar hawker's cry that made Izuna's face burn with shame.

"Beer, soda, mineral water~ peanuts, sunflower seeds, porridge~"

"Make way, make way~"

There he was. Uchiha Gin, pushing a cart piled high with snacks of every kind, calling out like a street vendor.

The clansfolk barely reacted. This was Gin, after all. His antics shocked no one anymore. In fact, people started buying.

Akimichi Shinji, as a true Akimichi, believed no shinobi should go without snacks. Pointing at a bag of chips, he asked eagerly:

"Gin-san, how much is this?"

"Only 1000 ryō~"

"What?! That expensive?"

Back outside, the same chips sold for a hundred at most. Here, ten times the price!

"Expensive? This is the Hokage's office. You think snacks here come tax-free?"

Gin winked slyly. Shinji caught the hint.

"…Alright, one bag."

Coins clinked. Shinji ripped open the bag immediately. Crunch, crunch.

Soon others joined in. "Give me sunflower seeds!" "Got bananas?" "Coke! I want ice-cold Coke!"

The stall was mobbed. Snacks gone in minutes. Gin pocketed the bills with a smug grin.

"Tch, such easy money. Should've stocked more."

"Big cousin! How could you disgrace the clan like this?!"

Izuna's face flushed red with shame as he dragged Gin aside, scolding.

"Making money isn't shameful." Gin waved him off. "Can family honor be eaten?"

At that moment, Sarutobi Sasuke shuffled closer, banana in hand, whispering:

"Gin-san, did you hear? The Hokage is setting up another leader position, equal in rank to himself."

"For real?"

"Of course! No lie."

So the secret had leaked after all. Tobirama had sworn it wouldn't spread until the Daimyo's decree arrived—but here it was, gossip among clans.

"Big cousin, what's Hashirama planning?" Izuna frowned.

"Whether it's medicine or poison, we'll just watch." Gin stuffed his cash into his pouch, unfolded a stool from his bag, and sat lazily.

Though the idea had been his, meant to secure Madara a rightful post instead of waiting forever for Hokage succession, Gin already suspected White Hair would meddle.

Sure enough, the doors opened. Hashirama entered in the Hokage robe, with Tobirama and Madara behind him. He froze at the sight: shinobi munching snacks, women chatting over sunflower seeds, laughter echoing.

This was supposed to be a solemn council. It looked more like New Year's tea time.

"Cough! Quiet, everyone!"

Hashirama infused chakra into his voice, booming across the room until silence fell.

"Hashirama-sama, why summon us so suddenly?"

An old elder stepped out, tone flat, lacking respect. Gin eyed the clan symbol on his robe—Senju elder, no doubt. Just as shady as Tobirama had described.

"Great Elder, be at ease. I called you all here to announce something."

Hashirama's gaze swept the room. Some faces showed excitement—they'd already heard rumors. Others furrowed brows, wary of what was coming.

"I alone cannot handle all village affairs. Thus, we create another position, equal in authority to Hokage. The Daimyo has already signed off."

He raised the decree high.

"W-what?!"

Shock rippled through the room. The Senju elder's face turned black as coal.

"Hashirama-sama, how could you not consult the clan?!"

"Great Elder, watch your words."

Tobirama's eyes flashed as he stepped forward coldly.

"The Hokage belongs to Konoha, not to the Senju alone. Don't ever speak like that again."

Even Hashirama, usually gentle, was furious. The elder had overstepped.

"What will this new leader's duties be?" a clan representative asked.

"The title is 'Village Secretary.' Equal power to me. One manages civil affairs, the other military."

Hashirama explained Tobirama's drafted plan in detail.

Hearing it, Sarutobi Sasuke's shoulders slumped. "So much power… way out of our league." His banana suddenly tasted like cardboard.

Gin leaned over. "What's this, Sasuke? Not going to try? You might roll the dice and win a motorcycle."

"No thanks! Our clan can't afford that gamble." Sasuke waved frantically.

"Boring." Gin sighed, then called out: "What about you, Tenyo? You're young and capable!"

"Not interested, goodbye!" Hyūga Tenyo bolted instantly. Typical Hyūga—masters of retreat.

Meanwhile Izuna whispered, thrilled: "Big cousin, our brother's finally going to make it!"

Gin shook his head. "Not so simple. Look at White Hair—smiling like a snake. He's plotting something."

Indeed, Tobirama's sly grin never left his face.

"Silence! We will now vote to select the Village Secretary. Nominations and self-nominations are welcome."

Hashirama's voice echoed.

"Perfect! Sasuke, we'll nominate you!" Kenichi clapped his friend on the back.

"Get lost! You want me dead?!"

"I nominate Senju Tobirama."

The Senju elder raised his hand. For him, keeping leadership in Senju hands was everything—even if it meant supporting a rival within the clan.

"WHAT?!"

Izuna shot to his feet, fury burning. "I nominate my brother!"

On stage, Madara's lips curled in a rare, soft smile. He glanced sidelong at Tobirama, eyes gleaming with challenge.

"Any others?"

No one spoke. Only the crack of sunflower seeds breaking in Gin's mouth.

"…Why are you staring at me? I'm just watching." He shrugged.

"Then the candidates are Senju Tobirama and Uchiha Madara."

Hashirama's heart twisted. Both men were precious. Choosing would tear him apart. So he passed the choice to the clans.

"Each of you will vote."

The clans murmured among themselves.

"Who to choose?"

"Of course Tobirama-sama. Just days ago, the Uchiha raid squad locked me in a cell for a whole night! You think I'll vote for them?"

"Right. Uchiha abuse their authority as guards. If one of them leads, they'll terrorize us even worse."

Others whispered: "Don't forget—Tobirama is the Hokage's brother. Supporting him is the safest path."

Gin overheard everything. His lips twitched. Then he turned to Tenyo.

"Tenyo, who'll you vote for?"

The Hyūga youth smiled faintly. "For you, Gin-san, I'll support your cousin Madara."

Gin blinked. Unexpected loyalty. He almost felt touched.

But then—a Hyūga messenger leaned in and whispered to Tenyo. The young man stiffened, face pale then red.

"Sorry, Gin-san. My father's orders…"

Gin only sighed, eyes full of pity. "It's fine. You tried."

Meanwhile Izuna's hope crumbled. Around them, resentment against Uchiha was clear.

"See? I told you to build friendships, but you ignored me. Now look—no allies." Gin shook his head.

On stage, Madara felt the weight of it too. He'd dreamed this role would give him legitimacy, a chance to stand beside Hashirama as equals. But Tobirama had played the game perfectly, letting others lift him up.

Hashirama's apologetic gaze stabbed Madara's chest.

"No need, Hashirama. I was naïve."

Madara exhaled slowly. Failure didn't break him. It only revealed where he'd misstepped.

Tobirama, meanwhile, feigned innocence, lips twitching upward despite himself.

"Hmph. I refuse to sully myself by stooping to you."

Madara turned his head coldly. Tobirama had manipulated the clans too well.

Inside, Tobirama was already laughing. He'd leaked the plan early on purpose, whispered to fence-sitters, tightened the leash on his Sarutobi disciple, nudged the cautious Hyūga leader. Even giving Uchiha the guard post had been a trap—turning their pride into a liability.

Konoha was his chessboard. And today, his pieces crowned him Village Secretary.

Hashirama sighed deeply. Ballots were counted.

As expected—Tobirama won by a landslide.

Izuna clenched his fists. "Big cousin! Aren't you going to do something?!"

Gin only spread his hands. "What can I do? When it comes to scheming, our whole clan combined can't beat that one White Hair."

He'd imagined Hashirama would insist on Madara, making the two brothers co-leaders. But Tobirama had swooped in early, claiming the role meant for the future.

Gin exhaled, watching Madara's defeated but unbroken figure.

"…Maybe it's for the best. The dream of Hokage is still alive for him."

(End of Chapter)

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