CHAPTER 148: BLOODY KISS

Damon’s lips roamed mine hungrily, like a starved man who hadn’t had a taste of euphoria.

It felt like my soul was being sucked out of me from that one kiss. It was maddening. But I didn’t want it, I didn’t want my soul stolen away, I didn’t want this roughness, my insides didn’t sing, nor did my heart flutter, I felt dead inside.

I beat my fist against his chest with all my might before successfully pushing him off me with a growl.

My face flushed with anger, eyes burning into his with an intensity that could freeze the ocean. There was no amount of curse I could throw at him that’d ever be enough; nothing could ever bring this devil to his knees.

He did a good job ruining me, and I despised him for it.

Damon gave me a bloodied grin, using his thumb to rub against his lips. I gasped in realization, tasting the sweetness in my mouth.

With a shaky hand, I wiped to see blood, his blood.

"It was about time you fed. Maybe I should’ve given you more."

More. My insides clenched at the thought of having that flavor again, and my heart broke. Why did I want it? I should shriek at him right now, but I was afraid that if I spoke, it’d be me begging for more.

As if sensing my internal tumult, he conveyed with delight in his tone. "Taking blood from your favorite source is like having a mouth orgasm but barely scratching it. Don’t fight it, Lou. Let it guide you."

I took one step back when he came closer, but he was at me before I could react.

"I’m only here to fulfil my duty to you." His wrist pressed against my mouth. "Your pupils are dilated. Go back to that hall, and they will see you for what you are. As much as I want to see such chaos, I won’t. Not with you in the middle of it."

My eyes turned glassy, and I squeezed them shut, but I didn’t pull away. I felt my teeth extend, and what happened next was ecstasy.

I held his wrist to keep him there, moaning as the flavor flared on my tongue.

I heard a grunt from Damon, but I was too busy trying to relish the flavor. I was drunk from the first taste, and now it felt like I was under a haze.

"If you keep going like this, Lou... I won’t be able to hold back," he murmured to my ear.

He held me close, and I thrust his wrist deeper into my mouth, drinking loudly.

"Easy..." he soothed, but I only got hungrier.

"We shouldn’t have let her starve, brother..."

My heart momentarily stopped, and I opened my eyes.

Drevon.

The look on Drevon’s face was indistinct, like gazing at blank paper without a vaguest trace of words. A chill dipped my spine.

Damon freed me. "You can feed her now. I have done my part," he said, smirking.

I thought Drevon would attack Damon, given how impossibly still and appeasing he was, but he didn’t acknowledge him at all.

Damon left.

I have always found solitude and a sense of warmth in Drevon’s presence, but it was nothing like that anymore. Tears were running down my face as I maintained eye contact with him, but there wasn’t any retort from him; he was like a statue, and I wasn’t sure if he was breathing.

His molten crimson eyes were lethargic, and nothing gave away what he could be thinking. I was terrified by his apathy, and on the other hand, I was saddled by the feeling that I had betrayed him.

With a heavy heart, I stepped past him, and I hoped, prayed that he would take my hand, but he didn’t, and I didn’t either.

~•~

Despair.

It was unlike anything I have ever felt. It unfurled only in my chest, and I felt like dying. I was hysterical as I used the water from the fountain, splashing it on my face multiple times.

I used the back of my hand to wipe my mouth, sobbing all through. I was a mess, and the tears weren’t stopping.

I was in pieces as I pictured the look on Drevon’s face; it haunted me like a livid nightmare. I wish I had stayed, I wish I had held his hand, or I don’t know, just did something, but I didn’t have the courage to face him.

I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t ask to be a snowblood.

I held my throat. This craving, this fucking craving. I wanted to rip my throat out to be freed of this desire.

"There you are."

I threw a look over my shoulder and found Sloane coming. I quickly pulled out a handkerchief and wiped my cheeks and mouth. I adjusted my skirt and composed myself.

I may be in pieces, but I won’t let her see it and feed off it.

"I was wondering where you went. I sent the servants to come get the moonflower you failed to bring. I gave you a simple task, and you couldn’t accomplish it. Is there anything you’re capable of doing?"

I chewed the inside of my mouth. "The servants were free then. I shouldn’t have wasted my time running errands for you."

She giggled. "Running my errands just showed how unfit you are."

"You never get tired, do you?"

Her eyes roamed my face. "What’s the matter, Eloise? Are you unwell?"

"Is there anything else to do? I should get to it then," I said, not wanting to endure her.

"Your eyes, you were crying, weren’t you?" She pulled out her handkerchief and stretched it for me to take. "Wipe it off, you look tragic."

I scoffed.

"Cheer up, for your life won’t be over. When I become queen, there will still be hope for you, but as for your marriage with Drevon..." She exhaled sharply. "I’m afraid only one of us will hold that title now."