CHAPTER 259: CHAPTER 259: THE EARTH SPIRIT HAMMERED INTO A PILLAR

EDITOR: DRAGON BOAT TRANSLATION

Ren Suo rubbed the dead skin on his calves with the sole of his foot while using his laptop to record the keywords of the ’pillar life experience’ of the last customer from Shenhai City.

Even Ren Suo himself was a bit surprised that he had made it to the fifth day of "Midnight Walker" without incident.

Since Dai Yuxing was the first customer and she left early, Ren Suo expected a bunch of Tactical Cultivators to come looking for a free meal before long. If that had been the case, Ren Suo would have had no choice but to load a previous save—he could only skip Shenhai City and look for other countries or cities to set up his stall.

Dai Yuxing had said that the Tactical System targeted big city parks because of Yellow Hair and specific intelligence from spies planted within the Federation. So, all Ren Suo had to do was avoid those places. There were plenty of foreign cities with second-rate "Concealment Concentration" to pick from.

But as the night passed, the customers who came all harbored murderous intent. They were typical, antisocial Demons and Ghosts. Ren Suo then let his guard down and seasoned their meals for them.

Ren Suo also noticed that, generally, the earliest customers were easier to understand and more tolerant of strong flavors. With these customers, Ren Suo only needed to extract the keywords to be almost certain of satisfying them.

However, in the last hour, the customers became more dangerous. Not only did Ren Suo need to extract keywords, but they also became very particular about the flavor’s saltiness. Too much "Joy," too little "Confidence," or not enough "Love"—they would all slam the table and demand a fight with the female store owner.

At this point, Ren Suo could only deal with each picky Strange Creature with a punch.

When it came to the last customer, essentially the boss of the level, it was always a struggle. Ren Suo just tried his best to exploit their specific weaknesses to debilitate them.

But so far, aside from Ben Gang City’s boss who happened to be taken down by chance, the bosses of the other four levels were only slightly weakened.

The boss from Shenhai was even more surprising—because it was a ’Strange Creature,’ and even more so because it didn’t try to dine and dash and was willing to share its experiences.

This was also the first time Ren Suo encountered a ’Strange Creature’ customer. This customer had a rather unique appearance—he wore a black robe embroidered with golden dragons, was completely hairless, his head shiny, his skin tender, with big eyes, a small mouth, and was a little kid less than one meter tall.

But as soon as he opened his mouth, Ren Suo knew for sure he wasn’t a Demon, Ghost, or Devil.

"Sister, I want a ton of cement, the hot kind! Not the 1:1 watery kind that you use to fill toilet cracks, I want the 1:3 kind for the right taste!" the Bald Kid demanded, slamming his hand on the table.

The order was the most bizarre Ren Suo had ever seen; what’s more, the female store owner actually brought out a bucket of cement.

Then the Bald Kid began recounting his life story.

"I’m a pillar," he said.

The Bald Kid lit a cigarette, took a deep drag, and the cigarette vanished in one inhale, his expression one of world-weary depression. "I’m under the overpass on Yan’an Road, that Coiling Dragon Pillar... You know about the Coiling Dragon Pillar, right?"

"At the time they were constructing the overpass, they couldn’t drive the pillar down at the convergence point of the overpasses from all four directions. Later, they brought a Mage who performed rituals there before they managed to drive the pillar down."

"Not only that, they wrapped the entire pillar in stainless steel and bronze dragon-patterned sculptures. After I awoke, I realized that the people at the time thought there was a Dragon Vein there; the Mage was supposed to be ’Banishing Dragons,’ and the dragon-patterned sculptures were meant to ’Suppress Dragons’..."

He finished a cigarette with every sentence, and his cigarette box was already half-empty. "But the fact is, the Mage’s efforts had no effect, and those dragon-patterned sculptures were meaningless. It was only because, after the Mage came, the construction team switched to more powerful piling machines, so they managed to drive the pillar down."

"As for why the pillar has dragon-patterned sculptures, I’m not clear on that. Maybe they had too much money back then, or maybe the leaders were superstitious," he said.

"’Until a year ago, I awoke to find myself turned into a pillar.’ The Bald Kid’s face was etched with gloom. ’I feel I’m quite unlucky.’"

"Because I’m the Earth Spirit of this place!"

"The pile was difficult to drive down at that spot because, hundreds of years ago, I had reinforced the rock layers for my own protection, ensuring no mining could occur nearby. I thought no one would bother me, right?"

"Who would have thought that today’s humans are so damn strong? That Mage too! He performed his rituals, sure, but he also poured shit on my head! If he hadn’t died ages ago, I would definitely have gone to settle accounts with him. Then they drove down the pillar, which smashed me to smithereens, and I could only attach myself to the pillar."

"Nearby Earth Spirits all came to mock me. I’m the only Earth Spirit imprisoned within a pillar, and I’m so furious!"

At this moment, the Bald Kid pointed at his head. "Because of the pillar, I can’t even Shape-shift to something taller; I can only take the form of this little imp, no different from how I looked hundreds of years ago... OUCH!"

The cigarette stub in his right hand jabbed his bald head, and he yelped in pain, looking utterly ridiculous and adorable.

Finishing the cigarette, the kid once again banged on the table forcefully. "Hurry up with the cement, I’m so hungry!"

And Ren Suo, with his laptop, was left completely baffled.

Is that all?

He had deliberately consumed a cup of Holy Water, and although it triggered a special effect "on the house," it now seemed as if he hadn’t drunk any at all.

When the Bald Kid was recounting his life experiences, not a single keyword came up!

Shameless! He actually swindled me!

As expected, there was no way one could breeze past the final boss with Krypton Gold; what a scam. Ren Suo, who nearly got conned, decided to be more careful in the future and not waste effort on the last customer again.

As for this Bald Kid, Ren Suo had no choice but to let it experience what it felt like to have "shit poured over its head" once more.

However, at this moment, the ingenuity of a Level 4 Player, or rather, the "Seeker of the Dao Correction Hat" that Ren Suo was wearing, finally came into play.

Is Holy Water really useless?

The purpose of Holy Water was to extract the Desires and Resentments emphasized in the customer’s words. Since there were no keywords, it meant that this customer didn’t care at all about what he had just said.

He didn’t care about the freedom lost from being hammered into a pillar, the tragedy of having shit poured over his head, the humiliation of being ridiculed by other Earth Spirits, or the anger of waking up after hundreds of years only to find himself in such a predicament. The Bald Kid didn’t care about any of it.

The Holy Water was not completely ineffective; it was reminding Ren Suo that the Bald Kid was indifferent to these matters, and that trying to appease or provoke him based on these things would be pointless.

Continuing this line of thought: the Bald Kid didn’t care about becoming a pillar, nor did he mind having shit dumped on his head. When he talked about these things, he even found it amusing. And his smoking—it seemed more like mimicking other smokers; he didn’t really think it was great, just amusing.

Yes, he was a playful little kid.

Hundreds of years ago, Shenhai was just a small fishing village, far from the Spirit Vein of the Central Plains, so it’s unlikely that the intelligence of the local Earth Spirits was very high.

So the Bald Kid was dangerous; he could, at any moment, out of amusement, cause accidents with serious casualties.

What did he fear the most? Boredom. What was he most looking forward to? Novelty.

Soon, Ren Suo knew exactly how to flavor things.

The female shopkeeper took out three bottles and poured them all into the cement: one of "Creation," one of "Happiness," and one of "Freedom."

The Bald Kid took the bucket of cement, guzzling it down much like one would consume ice cream.

After he finished, he wiped his mouth, looking at the shopkeeper in a daze, and then suddenly burst into hearty laughter.

"Wouldn’t it be fun if I made the statues on the pillars fly into the sky at midnight?" mused the Bald Kid. "If I say to every driver passing by, ’I’m right behind you,’ that sounds like it would be a lot of fun!"

"Thanks, sis, I’m gonna go back and play!"

Halfway out, the Bald Kid came back. He fumbled inside his clothes with his hand, rubbing vigorously, and eventually produced a small, grimy pellet. "A gift for you, sister!"

The female shopkeeper took it and looked:

**Earth Spirit’s Grimy Pellet**: Eating it increases Health Points by 1,000 and Attack Power by 100. When used as a seasoning in food, it can inflict damage equal to 50% of an enemy’s Health Points.

Watching the Bald Kid’s departing figure, Ren Suo felt that Shenhai City was about to witness the emergence of the most terrifying troublemaker in history...