CHAPTER 39: WELL, THAT WAS A WASTE

Lanz finally spotted them, his three dumbasses of destiny.

Same table as always and the same exact f*cking seating arrangement. Kenji sat front and center, hunched over his usual spaghetti tray, stabbing at the noodles like they owed him money.

Leo was chilling next to him, sipping melon soda like a 90s anime character who knew he was cool. Except for the fact that this guy was not

Hiro sat across from them, double-wielding chip bags.

"Man, I’m so excited for the Tier 1 raid," Kenji blurted between slurps. "I can finally level up properly. Level 7, baby!"

"Right? Bye bye level 5 me," Hiro added, half his sentence muffled by chips.

"Thank god a BB-Rank’s watching over us," Leo said, leaning back with the confidence of a man who thought melon soda counted as hydration.

Then, without warning, Kenji tilted his head just slightly and sighed. "Though... I wish Lanz could come..."

"Yeah..." Leo and Hiro said together, in perfect accidental harmony.

It took a second for that to register.

Lanz, who had been standing behind a vending machine like the nosy little gremlin that he is, felt his heart implode just a little bit.

They loved him. These idiots love this idiot.

The corners of his mouth curled up as he clutched his chest like some tragic telenovela heroine.

’Y—You bakas... You lovable, emotionally-stunted fools. I knew it. I f*cking knew it,’ he thought, eyes misting dramatically. ’You can’t live without me. Admit it.’

Then Leo, unknowing destroyer of moments, glanced around the cafeteria. "Wait. Where the hell is he anyway?"

"Oop, that’s my cue," Lanz whispered understand his breath.

He sprang into motion, strutting out from behind the vending machine like he’d been summoned by the power of affection and sheer self-importance.

"Heyyy, my lovely and dearest friends~" Lanz greeted in the most cursed uwu voice he could conjure, arms wide like he was hosting a game show.

Hiro squinted up at him. "Who the hell are you and why did you take over Lanz’s body specifically?"

"And here I was, trying to be nice," Lanz muttered, already dropping the act.

Leo barely looked up. "That’s exactly why it’s so unsettling."

Before Lanz could retaliate with sarcasm, Kenji perked up and pointed a fork in his direction. "Oh yeah! We gotta talk about the eastern district gate challenge!"

"Let him eat first, idiot," Leo interjected with a flat look.

"Hang on," Lanz said, already turning toward the cafeteria line.

"Can you get me another bag of chips while you’re at it!" Hiro called after him.

Lanz gave a lazy thumbs up over his shoulder, already halfway to the food counter.

He didn’t even mind, his boys literally wuv him. They just didn’t know how to say it out loud like normal people. Which, honestly, makes sense because these four are NOT normal in the head.

The school cafeteria at Velmordop East wasn’t fancy, but it got the job done. There were the usual trays of rice meals, meat skewers, and scrambled eggs with hotdog slices that showed up like clockwork every week.

Spaghetti was popular, the kind that came in a plastic container, sweet-style with bits of ground meat and shredded cheese barely holding on.

Chips were dumped near the bread station in a lopsided basket. Most of them were air with the emotional support of five pieces of corn puff.

Drinks sat in an old vending cooler near the exit: melon soda, bottled teas, and the occasional mystery fruit juice nobody trusted but still drank anyway.

Lanz picked up a bag of chips, grabbed the default rice meal, and made his way back to the table.

"Thanks," Hiro said, mouth already ready for round two. Pause.

"No problem," Lanz replied, plopping down beside them. He didn’t even bother opening his tray yet.

"So..." he began, dragging it out just a little. "How was it?"

The table went weirdly quiet for half a second.

Leo was the first to speak, eyes deadpan. "It... was... ass."

Kenji tried to soften it. "It wasn’t ass-ass. It was just... you know, a little disappointing. We were kinda bummed that Theodore lost to that Zero guy."

"Yeah, f*ck that guy," Hiro exclaimed, stuffing another chip in his mouth.

Lanz blinked and thought to himself, ’The hell did I just hear?’

"Wait, hold on. What’s your guy’s problem with this Zero guy anyway?" he asked, playing it cool even though his brain was very much not cool. If anything, it was overheating.

Kenji leaned back in his chair. "It’s a long story."

"Yeah, just know that Theodore should’ve won," Hiro said, nodding like he was talking about a national tragedy.

"You guys sound like losers, you know that, right?" Leo said with a shrug. Then he closed his eyes, sipped his drink, and muttered under his breath, "But you’re right. He should’ve won that sh*t."

Inside Lanz’s head, about eight alarms were going off. Full red alert, sprinklers, and every f*cking system failure possible.

’WHAT THE ACTUAL F*CK?! THEY HATE ME??!!’ Lanz thought like the distinguished gentleman that he is.

He stared at them, completely betrayed and a little personally attacked. These were his best friends. The same guys that felt bad for him earlier not being able to attend the raid. And now they were siding with someone random?

Well, it’s not like they know it’s Lanz. But let’s let him have his dramatic moment.

He forced a chuckle, trying to act like a normal functioning human being.

"O—Oh... I see. Who is this Theodore guy anyway?" Lanz asked, trying very hard to keep his voice casual. Like, totally not jealous at all casual.

Kenji leaned forward, slurping what was left of his spaghetti. "He’s a chill guy, guy. His full name’s Theodore Prune."

Lanz squinted. "Wait. Wasn’t he the one who soloed that Tier 2 Gate last month? The one in the canal district? It flooded half the training arena. Was that near Velmordop Public North?"

"Yeah, that guy," Kenji confirmed with a nod.

Lanz nearly choked on his rice. That was the guy? That beast of a hunter who had pulled off a freaking water-slide finisher mid-raid?

’How the hell did I beat that guy?!’ he thought, eyes blank. ’Was he on low battery? Did he trip and knock himself out mid-fight against that Death Knight? Was he allergic to the air in there?!’

"You guys are so lucky to meet him," Lanz said, forcing the kind of smile you give when you realize your friend just accidentally threw out your homework and called it garbage.

Kenji wasn’t done. "Oh, don’t worry, he’s coming to the Tier 1 raid too."

Lanz blinked. "What?"

"Yeah! Since it starts... what was it? Wednesday?" Hiro asked, turning to Leo.

"Yeah, Wednesday," Leo replied, already popping open another melon soda.

"Oh, right! Anyway, he said he’d come the day before," Hiro continued, completely oblivious to Lanz’s rising spiritual crisis.

"Why’s he coming?" Lanz asked, trying not to sound like he was panicking.

Leo answered, "He’s kinda this new apprentice at the guild the student council president hired. You know, the one guarding us during the raid."

"He told us he’s coming to observe the BB-Rank hunter," Kenji added helpfully.

"But we’d like to believe he’s here because he missed us," Hiro said with absolute sincerity, as if this was a romcom and they were long-lost childhood friends.

Lanz blinked again, twice.

His internal monologue had entered some kind of sarcasm-induced overdrive. ’Right. Missed you. That’s why CCC-rank prince charming Theodore is just casually flying in like he’s everyone’s favorite anime mentor. Wonderful. Love that for me.’

"Uh huh, that’s great," Lanz said, smile slowly approaching its breaking point. "But... how did you guys get his contact info?"

Kenji grinned. "Well, let’s just say the four of us got along."

"Yup," Leo confirmed, like that wasn’t the most suspicious answer in existence.

"You sure you didn’t force him?" Lanz asked, half-joking. But honestly, he wouldn’t put it past them to cling to the guy like gremlins until he caved.

And then, they all laughed, loud, obnoxious, absolutely delighted with themselves. Hiro even wheezed into his chips.

Lanz then stared at his untouched tray of food and chewed on the corner of his pride.

’Well,’ he thought, eyes blank. ’That was a waste of aura farming.’

End of Chapter 39.

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ALT SYSTEM — USER PROFILE: ZERO

Level: 13

EXP: 64 / 130

Next Reward: +10 Stat Points to a chosen stat

Global System Tracking: DISABLED

World Rank Association: UNLINKED

Stats:

STR: 10 | AGI: 10 (Affinity) | VIT: 5 | DEX: 5 | INT: 11 | WIS: 5

[Available Stat Points: 0]

[Derived Stat — MANA: 55 / 55]

Skills:

[Crimson Slash Lv. 1]

[Phantom Stride Lv. 2]

[Blade Control Lv.1]

[Parry Timing Lv.1]

[Reflex Sync Lv.1] (Passive Skill)

[Combat Awareness Lv.2] (Passive Skill)

[Skill Fusion Menu: Active]

[Dev Tree: Tier 0 Access Granted]

[Developer Node – Fusion Core Anchor: Active]

[Skill Slot Available — Unassigned]

Equipment:

Aged Blade Fragment (??? Rarity) (Bound)

Goblin Dagger

Spiked Boar Tusk Shard

Lightweight Chest Padding

Boots of Basic Mobility

Fingerless Gloves (Basic)

Starter Cloak: Faded Black

Training Ring (+1 VIT)