CHAPTER 427: CHAPTER 423: THE OLD MONSTER WHO CARES ABOUT IMAGE

Yin Le numbly listened as Tuanzi recited the names of the dishes. Some dishes he had never even heard of. Even though this was the Diaoyu Platform, he still wasn’t sure if they were available here. He had no choice but to write them down in a memo. The catch was, Tuanzi was an illiterate cat who could only read the names aloud; when Yin Le asked her which specific characters were used, she just turned into a little repeating machine. Yin Le could only rely on his imagination and trial-and-error to guess. What made it even harder was that some dish names sounded very tongue-twisting, clearly having a foreign flair, making them impossible to guess. Yin Le could only write down characters that sounded similar, hoping the chef at the Diaoyu Platform would understand.

Then, he went out to order the dishes.

Tuanzi was clearly looking forward to it, pacing back and forth on the bed. She wondered if she could manage to take even a bite of every dish, given how many she had ordered.

Huai Xu also wandered around the room, glancing everywhere.

"This room is really big! Tsk tsk! It’s magnificent! Much better than those hotels we used to stay in," Huai Xu paused. "But there’s one thing that’s not good."

"What?" Zhou Li turned his head.

"They should have a computer here!" Huai Xu pointed at the desk. "One of those powerful computers that can play games and battle royales. I’ve seen those cheap hotels, the ones costing about a hundred yuan a night, include a computer."

"You make a good point."

"Right?"

"Hmm..."

Zhou Li lay flat on his back, quietly watching Tuanzi walk back and forth on the bed, stepping over his chest. He no longer paid attention to the Old monster.

Although the Diaoyu Platform State Guesthouse also served the public, it was only in certain areas. As long as you could afford it, had no prior offenses, and weren’t involved in indecent or disreputable activities, you could rent parts of the Diaoyu Platform for accommodations, meetings, or dining. However, some areas were almost inaccessible to ordinary people, such as the Yangyuanzhai Chinese restaurant and the building Zhou Li was currently staying in, which were used exclusively for hosting state guests.

Install a computer in *this* room? Zhou Li mused. Do they expect state guests to use it for surfing the internet or processing documents?

Mealtime arrived, and Director Zheng and his department’s chief director came to join them.

Zhou Li pointed at the air beside him and introduced, "This is the Close Attendant of the Demon King of Yu Country, Lord Dumpling... although you can’t see her. You can call her Miss Tuanzi, or Lord Dumpling. The title ’Lord’ is basically an adoption from our ancient customs."

"It’s a great honor to meet you."

"Pleased to meet you."

Both directors greeted her appropriately.

Tuanzi blinked her large eyes, her cat ears twitching. She looked puzzled and asked, "Can you see Lord Dumpling, MEOW?"

Zhou Li smiled and relayed, "Lord Dumpling says she is also honored to meet you."

Yin Le remained silent.

Fortunately, the other colleagues weren’t involved in this, he thought. Otherwise, I’d probably be in for it...

Next, Zhou Li introduced Huai Xu to the chief director. Like Director Zheng, the chief director was also very impressed by Huai Xu’s appearance and demeanor.

They all proceeded to the dining room and took their seats.

Yin Le whispered to Zhou Li from behind, "You’re out of luck. The servers here are usually gorgeous. And not just ordinarily good-looking—they possess a dignified, classy kind of beauty. But most of them aren’t around today; only two are left."

Zhou Li nodded politely, though he didn’t really care.

The dishes began to arrive one after another, but because there were only two servers, they came slowly.

The two directors and Huai Xu chatted idly, mostly about ancient history. Unsurprisingly, some of Huai Xu’s stories were fabricated. But it didn’t matter; even if he claimed some Emperor had three legs and that no one dared to say or write about it, they would probably believe him.

Such is the power of authority.

Zhou Li ate quietly, occasionally picking up food for Tuanzi and respectfully saying each time, "Lord Dumpling, please try this..."

This was to underscore Tuanzi’s status.

It made Tuanzi feel immensely satisfied, and her appetite improved significantly.

In contrast, Huai Xu behaved particularly ’appropriately,’ rarely reaching for food with his chopsticks, as if his mind wasn’t on the meal at all.

"Is it good?" Zhou Li asked Tuanzi softly.

"Delicious, MEOW!"

"Oh."

"Is this a state banquet, MEOW?"

"I don’t know if it counts."

"Zhou Li, you’re so silly~~"

"Have some of this."

Zhou Li served her another piece of squirrel-shaped mandarin fish.

A state banquet actually refers to a banquet held by the head of state or government to entertain state guests, other VIPs, or, on important holidays, prominent figures from all walks of life. Generally, these can be categorized as "hall banquets" (held at the Great Hall of the People) or "platform banquets" (held at the Diaoyu Platform State Guesthouse).

Zhou Li wasn’t sure if today’s meal counted.

Probably not, he thought. Tomorrow’s definitely will.

However, today’s meal did include dishes commonly served at state banquets. According to Yin Le, after hearing the list of dishes Lord Dumpling had reeled off, the head chef was so astonished that he decided to cook them himself. Therefore, purely in terms of food quality, tonight’s dinner was likely on par with a state banquet.

The difference lay in the level of formality and official designation.

As far as Zhou Li was concerned, the food was indeed delicious, but just as he had teased Huai Xu earlier, the flavors were too fresh and light. This was the complete opposite of the heavy oil and intense spices found in a dive diner. For example, he had ordered ’Boiled Beef in Chili Oil,’ a Yicai dish famous for its richness and spiciness. Here, however, it was prepared with reduced oil and chili, clearly to cater to the palates of older guests and to fit the ’state banquet’ style. But dishes like Buddha Jumps Over the Wall and stir-fried eel were exceptionally well-prepared.

Additionally, it seemed the kitchen was quite far away, as the dishes had lost their fresh-from-the-wok heat by the time they were served.

Therefore, what struck Zhou Li most was the ’high-end’ nature of these dishes.

Though, I’m not much of a gourmet anyway, he thought. If only Brother Nan were here...

「After dinner.」

Huai Xu returned to his room, sprawled out on the bed in a starfish pose, and stared lifelessly at the ceiling, feeling utterly despondent.

Zhou Li went to the bathroom to check the toiletries. They seemed slightly better than what he had brought, making him feel rather unsophisticated. When he came out, he calmly glanced at Huai Xu, then sat on the bed and began taking off his shoes. "What’s up?" he said. "So, to maintain your... portrayal of a venerable sage, you missed out on the meal. And now you want to grab the you from this morning and beat him up?"

"Kind of..."

"..." Zhou Li lowered his head and chuckled. "Too bad you only have the ability to Shuttle Space, not time."

"I’m dying..."

"Of hunger?"

"Both hungry and tired..."

"Well, if you knew it would come to this, why did you bother in the first place?"

Zhou Li lowered his head, suppressing a laugh. He rarely saw this Old monster so dejected. When was the last time? It seemed to be last spring when they had just met, and Huai Xu had tried to strike up a conversation with him, which he had ignored.

"I had no choice," Huai Xu said.

"Hmm?" Zhou Li looked at him, puzzled. "Why didn’t you have a choice?"

"I represent the Demons; I can’t behave like..." Huai Xu thought for a moment, "...like an ignorant child, shaming all demons."

"You actually consider that?"

"Not really. It’s mainly because you said I’m Master Ming’s student, and I can’t disgrace him." Huai Xu’s voice still carried a tone of utter despondency. "Though I don’t think there’s anything wrong with my usual self. On the contrary, a childlike heart brings the most joy. If you humans lived as long as we do, you’d eventually realize this too. Over time, you’d choose to pursue the purest happiness in the simplest way. But alas, you don’t live that long. So, your naive selves can’t understand us old-timers. You have your biases, thinking such behavior is childish and improper."

"Are you trying to explain why you’ve lived so long and are still so foolish?" Zhou Li asked, puzzled. "But didn’t you explain last time that it was because when you became a Demon, your entire body, including your brain, transformed into another state, and this was a lingering side effect?"

"I’m not explaining that! And I’m not foolish!" Huai Xu whipped his head around and glared at him fiercely. "I’m explaining my behavior today!"

"But why do you even care?"

"Living in this world, one inevitably has to care about others’ opinions. Normally, I don’t. But I have to care on my teacher’s behalf."

"Maybe Master Ming doesn’t care either?"

"He probably doesn’t, but I still have to care on his behalf."

Sounds so complicated... Zhou Li thought.

"So, how was my performance?"

"Great."

"I’m a professional," Huai Xu said, repeating his earlier line. He then added, "I spent a long time at home last night, thinking back. I tried to recall how those ancient humans—those talented scholars or great Confucian masters with elegant reputations—usually behaved. I even watched some TV and rehearsed for ages."

"Was it tiring?"

"I’m a professional," Huai Xu insisted. "Life is like a play; we’re always performing, every moment of every day. Everyone is."

"But..." Zhou Li hesitated.

"But what?" Huai Xu frowned.

"But don’t some ancient books say... that those who could heartily eat large amounts of meat and drink big bowls of wine also possessed great heroic spirit?" Zhou Li asked, looking puzzled. "Some stories even claim that certain individuals could devour a whole sheep or many pounds of meat in one sitting. When people heard this, they considered them great heroes, prime material for generals, full of valor."

"Really? Is that true?" Huai Xu sat bolt upright, his tone suddenly anxious. How could I have missed such a book?

"Really."

"Which book!?"

"Lots of books. I forget which ones specifically," Zhou Li said. "Definitely not in elementary school textbooks, though."

"Why didn’t you tell me earlier!" Huai Xu leaped from the bed, his teeth clenched, so angry he could barely breathe.

"You never asked me!" Zhou Li blinked. "It would have been so much better if you’d discussed it with me beforehand. Your act this morning was rather off-putting, you know? I haven’t even asked you to compensate me for that, and here you are, blaming me instead!"

"You..."

Huai Xu stammered, struggling for words for a long moment before finally blurting out, "Look at you! Ever since you started dating, you’ve even started talking like Li Daimao! You were never like this before!"

Zhou Li just hmmed.