CHAPTER 39: CHAPTER 39: TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT

A lie. A necessary lie.

As he turned to leave, Meical’s voice stopped him. "Don’t forget, Kaizar, you were the one who pushed me away first. You said you wouldn’t regret it, right? Then let’s do this your way."

He walked past Min-jae without so much as a glance, his cloak brushing his arm as he went by.

For the first time that night, Min-jae felt the chill not from the wind but from the words he knew he’d come to regret.

Min-jae barely made it past the front steps before his knees buckled. The world tilted, the floor rushing up to meet him as a dull ache spread through his body.

"Shit..." he muttered, vision flickering. He had forgotten he hadn’t eaten all day. His head felt hollow, his stomach cramping.

"Lord Kaizar!" one of the maids cried. She rushed forward, her skirt rustling, as another knelt beside him, trying to lift him by the shoulders. Their voices blurred together, a chorus of worry and panic.

"Get water!"

"Call for the physician!"

"He’s burning up, someone hurry!"

But the edges of his vision were already darkening. The last thing he saw was the flicker of a light above him before everything faded to black.

When he opened his eyes again, the room was dim and quiet. The faint scent of sandalwood still lingered in the air. His head rested against something firm and warm.

He blinked.

Strong arms held him close.and when he tilted his head up, he found himself in Meical’s arms.

He knew he had passed out, so how did he end up here?

The dim light cast soft shadows across Meical’s face, tracing the sharp line of his jaw and the exhaustion in his eyes. His thumb brushed unconsciously against Min-jae’s shoulder.

Min-jae sighed softly. What was he even doing?

He’d built walls so high just to protect himself, and yet here he was—collapsing in the very arms he’d been trying to avoid.

He told himself it was for the best, that keeping distance would make everything easier when the time came.

But easier for who?

They were married. Bound by name, by law, by something that ran far deeper than either of them wanted to admit.

Could he really keep pretending they were strangers sharing a home?

If he took Seraphine down, Meical would still be his. That was what he’d told himself from the start. So why did it feel like he was the one losing?

He let out a quiet breath and shifted closer, unable to help it.

Meical was warm,.steady in a way that made his own heartbeat slow. The faint sound of his breathing filled the room, grounding him.

Min-jae closed his eyes. He always felt so small beside him, but Meical never treated him like someone lesser. Never once had he looked at him with pity or condescension.

Only warmth. Only quiet, patient warmth.

For the first time since yesterday, Min-jae let himself rest, his cheek against Meical’s chest, the slow rhythm of his heartbeat pulling him under again.

He didn’t know when he’d fallen asleep. Only that, for a brief moment, he stopped fighting it.

When Min-jae’s eyes fluttered open again, the faint golden light of dawn filtered through the sheer curtains.

His body felt heavy, and warmth still cocooned him. It took a few seconds before he realized that warmth wasn’t the blanket...it was Meical.

Meical was awake. His dark eyes were open and fixed on him silent and unblinking, as though he’d been watching him for hours.

The moment their gazes met, Min-jae’s chest tightened.

He turned away, trying to slip out of those arms, but the instant he moved, Meical’s hand tightened around his waist. The motion was firm, leaving no room for escape.

"Don’t.." Meical said softly, his voice deep with fatigue but steady.

Min-jae froze, his back to Meical’s chest.

"Tell me the truth.." Meical murmured, pulling him back until they were face to face, breath mingling in the small space between them. "Why are you really doing this? Why are you pushing me away?"

His voice cracked slightly, just enough to make Min-jae’s throat ache.

"You know those words I said yesterday?" Meical continued. "I regret them. I don’t want you to ignore me. I want you to light up when you see me. I want you to share the same room again. To bathe with me like before. I just.." his voice softened, breaking into a whisper. "I want you to be free around me again."

Min-jae’s chest rose and fell unevenly.

Always I want. Always what he wanted. No one ever asked what Kaizar wanted, what he—Min-jae wanted.

He let out a shaky sigh. "You’ve never asked me what I want, have you? Why do you say these things? What could you possibly gain from them?"

Meical stilled. His lips parted slightly, but no words came out. For the first time, he seemed at a loss.

What did he gain? What was he even chasing? He didn’t understand the distance Kaizar had built between them.

Considering how their marriage came to be, there was only one explanation he could think of.

"Are you worried we’ll fall in love?" Meical asked quietly. Then his eyes softened, as if the realization had struck him like lightning. "Or... are you worried I’ll fall in love?"

Min-jae’s breath hitched. His eyes widened, and he looked away quickly, heart hammering in his chest.

In the novel, Kaizar never cared about Meical. The two of them had been nothing but political partners.

But this wasn’t that world anymore—was it?

He wasn’t Kaizar, no matter how much the novel said he was.

He didn’t think like him.

He didn’t feel like him.

He was Min-jae.

And his goal here was to destroy Seraphine, to avenge Kaela, to right the wrongs of a story already written. But now... he didn’t even know which role he was playing anymore.

What was he running from?

His throat tightened as the answer formed in his chest. Himself.

Because deep down, he knew, he didn’t mind this closeness. He didn’t mind the way Meical’s hands felt against his skin, or how his voice could undo him with a few quiet words.

He didn’t mind being pinned beneath him, breathing the same air, sharing the same space.

He turned back slowly. Meical was still watching him, waiting for his reply.

"That’s right.." Min-jae said quietly. "I’m afraid of that. I think we’re too close. We need some distance."