BOOK 9: CHAPTER 38: THE AGONY OF STILLNESS

A bird rested upon Elijah’s shoulder while a two-tailed fox curled in his lap. He ignored both, instead focusing entirely on the stillness within him. His heart barely beat, he didn’t breathe, and his core remained perfectly dormant. There wasn’t a drop of ethera in his channels, and his every muscle stood tense.

Yet, his mind never stopped moving. The apertures remained open, spinning to create a powerful vortex through which he would not allow a single ounce of ethera to enter. It was worse than refusing to breathe. It was like suffocating, starving himself, and being dehydrated – all while sweet air and a feast lay before him.

It was an exercise in willpower, and Elijah wasn’t certain how much longer he could maintain it.

Still, he kept going, and each second felt like an eternity. There was no ignoring the strain. The agony of it remained at the forefront of his thoughts. To stop it, all he had to do was relax, to let his body, mind, and soul do what it so desperately wanted to do. That cycle was natural, but even so, Elijah resisted.

Seconds stretched into minutes, and minutes into hours. He felt every moment. He endured every instant of self-imposed torture. The pressure built and built until, at last, he could hold it no longer. Ethera exploded from his core, slamming into his channels to be joined by a deluge of energy coming through the apertures in his mind.

He gasped, his shoulders slumping as his heart went wild.

The movement startled the bird, and it threw itself into the air. The fox was no less shocked, and it disappeared into the brush only a second later. But the effects didn’t stop there. Every organism within a ten foot radius fled the area, terrified of the surge of ethera within him.

For a few moments, Elijah felt like he was in the middle of a heart attack. Sweat beaded on his forehead, while his chest tightened, and his breath came in ragged gasps. It only took a couple of minutes for him to normalize, but it felt like hours before he felt like he’d returned to some measure of equilibrium.

Only then did he lay back on the spongy forest turf and let out a long, slow sigh.

It was far and away his best attempt yet, though he knew he still had a long way to go before he was ready to advance his soul cultivation. Doing so required him to maintain perfect control over the ethera in his body, which was a skill that, according to the guides he’d read, normally took a lifetime to achieve. Children were taught the skill from a young age, normally via a series of exercises that just weren’t possible for someone with Elijah’s power. They built those skills over time, adapting to increasing strength until, when the time came, they were prepared to take the step.

Elijah didn’t have that option.

Even if he’d started his exercises the day the world had changed, it would have been too late.

Thus, his struggles.

But he was convinced that he could make it work. He just needed to be diligent with his practice.

Slowly, he stretched his cramping limbs, then pushed himself to his feet and looked around. The forest of his island had recovered since the invasion, and yet, some scars lingered – both in the land and in the glaring absences in his mind. Not feeling Susan was a huge blow, and not just to him. Bubba and Annabelle were still distraught, though, as had been the case with the crab, Elijah had no idea how to address their distress.

Only time would heal those wounds.

After spending a few more minutes stretching, Elijah decided to get a short workout in. So, he spent the next few hours engaged in physical exertion. It wasn’t all that effective – at least as a training method – but running and swimming settled some of his thoughts. He’d also run the tower earlier in the week, but he’d been more than a little disappointed to find that it was even easier than it had been the last time he’d entered.

And it was almost useless in terms of progression.

According to Nerthus, a tower’s difficulty was based not only on the highest level of the entrants, but also was capped by the world’s ethereal density. It seemed that Elijah’s power had begun to outpace Earth’s, which wasn’t surprising. It did frustrate him though.

The rewards were just as disappointing, and he’d already passed them on to Carmen in the hopes she – or someone else working in the Forge of Creation – could make use of them.

By that point, Ironshore’s fighters routinely made use of the tower, so there was no shortage of rewards floating around.

Once Elijah had completed his nearly useless training, he returned to the grove to soak in his hot tub. The children – including Hope – were there getting lessons on cultivation from Nerthus. That took up a good portion of their days, and the rest was spent working on their skills. Most wanted combat classes, but a couple wanted to become Tradesman.

Unfortunately, there were no future Scholars among them. And Elijah hadn’t felt anything within them that suggested anyone would become a Druid.

That was a bit of a disappointment, but according to Nerthus, it was not an unexpected turn of events. Druids weren’t unheard-of, but they weren’t common either. It took a very special sort of person to follow that path, both in terms of aspects and demeanor. Most didn’t have that in them, so the likelihood that he’d find someone like that in Ironshore was practically nil.

Still, he’d hoped.

The idea of meeting other Druids – that hadn’t been corrupted, like in the Trial of Primacy – had been in the back of his mind for some time. He’d kept an ear to the ground in the hopes of hearing a rumor that might lead him in that direction. But so far, he’d heard nothing even remotely promising.

Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

That served to reinforce his loneliness.

Sure, he had family like Carmen, Miguel, and Nerthus. He had close friends like Ron, Atticus, and Kurik. Slightly weaker friendships with a host of other people, too. But there was no one to share his burdens.

Maybe that would change one day.

He was also surprised that the parents had allowed their children to return. Certainly, he’d have thought twice about doing so if they were his responsibility.

After only a few more minutes, Nerthus dismissed his impromptu class, and most of the children scattered. According to the spyggent, training was necessary, but giving them free time to connect with the grove was important as well. When Elijah expressed some concern that the island’s wildlife might pose a danger, Nerthus insisted that he could keep an eye on them.

Hope remained within the grove, though, and she soon found her way to Elijah.

“Master Druid,” she said, with a mock curtsey.

Elijah couldn’t help but grin. “Hey. How’s the cultivation going?” he asked.

“It’s progressing. Slowly. Nerthus says I’m not that far from getting to Body of Wood. I need a few more levels, though. And more practice with the exercises. The soap you made helps a lot, too.”

“That’s great, Hope. You’ll get there in no time.”

“That’s the idea,” she said with a grin. Then, she headed off toward the dock. A couple of other children were ahead of her, presumably because they needed to return to the city.

“Why aren’t they terrified of me?” Elijah asked when he felt Nerthus beside him. “They should be. By now, they know exactly what I’ve done.”

“They trust you.”

“But why?”

Nerthus answered, “I don’t know. Perhaps it’s because they have gotten to know you a little. Maybe it’s because they’ve begun to develop a connection with the grove and, by extension, you.”

“Maybe. How about you? Are you okay?”

“You know I am. Stop asking.”

“I’m just –”

“Worried. I am fully recovered and working toward getting stronger. Nothing like that will ever happen again. You have my word on that,” Nerthus stated. It was easy to forget that Nerthus likely had trauma of his own. But as much as Elijah wanted to help him, he just didn’t know how.

“I’m here for you,” he said. “You know that, right? You’re not alone. If you want to talk or…I don’t know…just know that I’m here.”

“Thank you, but I am fine.”

Left unsaid was something that had been on Elijah’s mind since Nerthus had nearly died. If he’d used the Primordial Loam on himself instead of the tree, then perhaps the spryggent would have fared much better. Elijah still regretted not insisting on it, but he knew that would have fallen on deaf ears.

After that, their conversation predictably came to a screeching and awkward halt. So, it wasn’t long before Elijah decided to head to Ironshore. It wasn’t just that he had some errands to run – he did – but he also felt it was important to show his face in town. That way, people could once again grow accustomed to his presence.

Because he could no longer deny that the vast majority of the residents were terrified of him. It was obvious the second he entered the city, with every eye following his path through the city. They reminded him of prey animals when confronted by an apex predator. Even though they were sure he wasn’t there to hunt them, their every instinct screamed at them to keep a wary eye out for an attack.

It was disappointing, but he couldn’t blame them.

After walking through town for a few minutes, he found his way to his first destination – the Forge of Creation – where he found Carmen predictably hard at work. She didn’t have time for him, so he quickly moved on, stopping at Mama Lou’s for an early dinner. The patty melt wasn’t exactly beef-based, but it was close enough that the creation was still incredibly tasty.

And even more importantly, Sue Anne didn’t treat him any differently than before the attack on his island. The same couldn’t be said for the other diners, many of which finished their meals in record time and scurried out of the diner. Before Elijah had finished his meal, the place was empty.

Sue Anne said, “Don’t let them get you down. We all know you’re not a monster.”

“I’m not so sure,” he replied.

“Well, if you are a monster, then you’re our monster. They’ll get over it.”

Elijah hoped so.

But he wasn’t optimistic. That was the cost of going down the road he’d taken. He’d set out to create a warning for anyone who chose to cross him, and he had accomplished that goal. The side effect was that the warning was just as relevant for his allies as his enemies.

It didn’t matter, though. He couldn’t change the past, and even if he could, he wasn’t certain that he would. His reasons remained just as valid now as they had been when he’d made his choices.

After finishing his meal and paying Sue Anne, he found his way to his next destination, where he picked up a bunch of premade meals made by some of Ironshore’s best Cooks. Most had been prepared from the whale meat, but he’d traded much of that for other varieties.

Once he’d paid his fees, he slipped those meals into his Arcane Loop, where they would remain indefinitely fresh. Of course, he also had plenty of dried rations that he stored in his Ghoul-Hide Satchel, and though they were a sight better than eating monster meat, he didn’t look forward to them the same way he looked forward to the prepared meals.

His penultimate stop was to collect some coffee he’d had roasted. Not only would it provide a powerful buff – he wasn’t sure how much in terms of attributes, but he knew it was much stronger than any he’d had before – but the last thing he wanted was to be caught out in the wilderness without the comfort of his favorite beverage.

Finally, he headed to the Branch. He’d made a habit of visiting each day in the hopes of receiving a message from Sadie. She’d been inside the Primal Realm for months at this point, and with every passing day, he felt more pessimistic about her situation. She was still alive. He knew that because Ivanka had sworn to inform him if she learned otherwise.

But that didn’t dispel his worry.

Unfortunately, there was no message from Sadie. Nor was there one from Ivanka, which was a relief. However, there was a single message that he hadn’t expected.

Sender

Recipient

Oscar Ramirez

Elijah Hart

I need your help. Please come to Bogotá. There are Spires there. Come south, and find me. I don’t know where else to turn.

Elijah didn’t hesitate to send a message back telling Oscar that he would be there. Part of it was loyalty to someone he considered a friend. Not a close one, but someone he both liked and respected. However, Elijah couldn’t deny that he was also driven by a need to do something, to distract himself from the consequences of his recent actions. He was self-aware enough to recognize that the latter reason probably played more of a part in his decision than the former.

So, without further ado, he headed back to the island so he could prepare for what he suspected could easily turn into a long trip.