18 - Self

The shattered sky now seemed brighter, more divinely beautiful. The shades of his acclamation devoured the air. It was all a spectacle to help Sakuto acknowledge who he really was.

“That old man tried to rip you out of here, but our power of adaptation has befriended the crystal.” Soulkuto explained. “Now, we can share this moment together.”

Soulkuto extended his pearly white hand.

“Come, let’s go.”

“Where?” Sakuto asked.

“Does it matter?” Soulkuto asked back. “As long as you don’t let go of me, you’ll be fine wherever you go. It won’t matter what direction you walk.”

Sakuto held his hand, and they started walking. The school’s roof now materialized itself as a white glowing pane.

A loud thundering noise caught Sakuto by surprise, but Soulkuto didn’t seem to care. The thunder roared as if it attempted to strike Sakuto, grab him and take him away, but that couldn’t be allowed. Soulkuto flicked his fingers, and the strange thunder that kept staring them down was destroyed.

“What was that?” Sakuto asked.

“I let the interrupter know that his efforts are futile.”

They walked for longer, it felt so peaceful that Sakuto started to lose track of his footsteps. The more they walked, the more their altitude increased. The more vibrant the skies appeared. It felt like they were climbing a mountain.

“Do we need to do anything other than just walking?” Sakuto asked.

“You can do whatever you feel is right.” Soulkuto replied. “Just keep walking. And keep holding onto me and the little guy next to you. Make sure he’s not alone.”

“Right...” Sakuto nodded. He somehow didn’t get surprised that Smallkuto was walking next to them, holding his other hand.

“You’re in pain, aren’t you? Soulkuto asked.

“I guess.”

“You have no reason to lie to me. I’m you.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”

“And what do you feel right now?”

“Dunno. It feels like an awakening, but...more peaceful. I can’t find the right words for it.” Sakuto replied. Smallkuto eagerly nodded.

“It is an awakening.” Soulkuto said. They walked for a bit longer. Sakuto’s shadowy trail followed him, wiggling around on the glowing ground like a tail. “Does this make sense to you?”

“Yeah.”

“Good.” Soulkuto said. “See, a divine acclamation is the release of your soul. You did all of that fancy stuff, you broke your limits, yadda yadda...but you were far from fully awakening it. You didn’t truly grasp what you unleashed, it’s like you never believed in it. Your soul...is so uniquely complex and beautiful in its own way.”

“People say it’s scary. Everyone said my soul presence feels strange or scary.”

“They fear what they can’t understand at first sight.” Soulkuto said. Sakuto slowed down a little, his eye wide open. “And many don’t look beyond that first sight.”

“Fear is a standard response to the unknown, the unachievable. And given time, fear turns into hatred. And hatred unlocks the true monstrosity of a human’s heart.” Soulkuto explained. “You being high up in these mountains is the reason you’re resented by those at the bottom. They can’t even see the mountain for what it is.”

“Yeah, I know about that.”

“It’s also the reason you feel so alone.” Soulkuto said.

Sakuto stopped.

“Why did you stop walking?” Smallkuto asked, stopping next to him.

“Because things like these make me slow down and think.” Sakuto said. “And a lot of times, I end up overthinking. And it hurts. It makes me think I wasn’t even supposed to think anymore.”

“Sakuto, listen to me carefully, okay?” Soulkuto said, turning to him.

“Okay, I’m listening.”

“It hurts being alone, doesn’t it?” Soulkuto said. “Sometimes, you just wish someone would hold your hand and tell you that everything would be alright.”

“Yeah, something like that.” Sakuto agreed. “And a hug too. A hug would be really nice.”

“But in the end, nobody is there.” Soulkuto sighed. “And it hurts you. It hurts you so much you want to rip your own head off and tear your heart out. No matter how much you tell yourself that you’re fine, you’re still suffering from the same soul-crushing loneliness that haunted you, and the same loneliness that will continue to haunt you forever.”

“And even if I have people I trust, I still feel alone...” Sakuto said.

“That’s right. And it makes you feel guilty too, doesn’t it? It makes you doubt yourself. And hate yourself. Oh, it makes you hate yourself so badly. I know best.”

“I’m alone because I’m different, aren’t I?” Sakuto asked. “I’m something that shouldn’t exist.”

“You are different, Sakuto.” Soulkuto said. “But let me ask you this.”

“Why not embrace it?”

“What do you mean?” Sakuto asked.

“So what if you’re alone?” Soulkuto asked. “Does it make you anything less than the others?”

“You can’t be like me and be happy.” Sakuto said, a little sad. “If I accept it, that’s the same as accepting that I’ll never be happy.”

“Here’s what you misunderstand, Sakuto.” Soulkuto said, putting his hands on Sakuto’s shoulders. “Tell me, can a man who spent his life in the mountains truly understand the joy of running in a golden field of wheat or a peaceful emerald pasture?”

Sakuto quietly gasped.

“Why make a sad face for lacking something you’ll never grasp? So what if it’s something that all those other people think is the embodiment of happiness and a measurement of worth?” Soulkuto asked. “You should be looking forward to the things that can make you happy. The things that you can understand, those within the domain of your mindscape.”

“To them, you are a flaw of the world. But to you, they’re all just a bunch of morons running in a field.” Soulkuto said, leaning a little closer. “Who cares about them?”

“What I’m trying to say is...”

“You need to live and act upon your soul.”

“Just the way you want to. With no regrets, no doubts, and no hesitation. Just the way that makes you happy.” Soulkuto’s eyes gained the same shade of gray painted with a soulful color.

“Sakuto, you deserve to live.”

Sakuto stepped back.

“Say that...again...?”

“You deserve to live.” Soulkuto said. “You shouldn’t hate yourself for who you are. You just need to stop holding yourself back. Go out there, explore the mountains. Fulfil whatever wish you have. Do what you think is right, and don’t back down on it.”

“Hah...I don’t think anyone’s ever told me that...” Sakuto teared up. He smiled a little.

“You are worth so much. More than you could imagine.” Soulkuto said. “Just these thoughts and conversations alone make you priceless.”

“There’s so many things that are great about you, and there’s so many things that you’re good at, or you want to be good at, or are, or can, or want to, or need to or have to...”

“There’s so many people that have put their faith in you, that trust you or want to trust you. There’s so many of these priceless soulful bonds that you have or will have or want to have.”

“There is so much you make a difference in.”

"And there are so many people that would miss you if you gave up."

“So you truly do deserve to live.”

“So please..."

"Never let your soul be extinguished.”

Sakuto didn’t know how to react. He just stared at Soulkuto, accepting every word he said, and somewhat wishing he said more.

“Once you leave this place, you won’t see me. Probably ever again.” Soulkuto said. “You’ll feel like you’ve been blind your whole life, and you just gained sight again.”

“I’ll never see you...?” Sakuto asked.

“Yeah, and the same goes for the little guy. But you won’t need to worry about it. Because as long as you hold onto us, you’ll never lose us.”

Sakuto tried to walk again. His legs felt heavy, but he managed to make the first step, which felt so excruciatingly heavy and painful.

“It’s hard, isn’t it?” Soulkuto said, his and Smallkuto’s silhouettes slowly fading away. “No matter how many speeches I give, you still feel the pain. The abyss finds a way to latch onto you. It’ll try to drown you, but as long as you trust me, you’ll be fine.”

“But you have to keep walking.”

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“No, forget that. Run. And keep on running.”

“You want to get out, don’t you? Then run.”

Sakuto walked faster and faster, eventually, he started sprinting. The environment became more and more glowy, until everything was a pure, divine white. He kept sprinting.

“Trust yourself, and never stop.”

“Keep running...”

“Faster...”

“Faster!”

"Even if the abyss is there, even if you're in pain, even if life seems utterly hopeless and pointless..."

"Please, tell me..."

“Will you live?”

Sakuto paused for a while. Through tears, he managed to quietly utter a response.

“I’ll...try.”

“I promise I’ll try.”

Sakuto sprinted so fast that the images around him became a blurred mess. His vision shut down, and he lost all feelings in his body, all except a feeling of enlightenment. He felt the edge of the crystal.

Everything was quiet. It was dark too. But he found comfort in the darkness. Not because it allowed him to give up, but because it reminded him that he was now above it. He felt awake.

“To live the way my soul desires...and to accept my soul and to put my trust in it.”

“Everything flooding my mindscape, including the abyss, is in my arsenal.”

“ ✦ To be a true soulful...with no regrets. ✦ ”

He was no longer alone. He had himself.

[00:17]

“The crystal’s presence is concealed because of the active deadzone that’s bound to it.”

“But I know that it should be in this very room!”

Mukawa was under fire from Nightseer, but he, albeit with great difficulty, managed to break into the building. He, with the help of his weapons and comrades, broke through the many barricades and finally reached the top room.

“Fuck, he’s dead...” Mukawa said, looking at Fedor’s corpse and the blood gushing out of his fatal wound. “It’s okay old man, your sacrifice-”

“Mukawa...”

“What?” Mukawa said. The look of utter confusion on Kana’s face planted a rather unfortunate thought into his mind.

“The crystal’s gone.” Kana said.

“What do you mean it’s gone?! Look around! It can be anywhere!”

“No, look.” Haruki said. “There’s his corpse, there’s the wires...the crystal just isn’t here.”

“No...”

“It couldn’t be the Heisei...both of their divisions were being held off. And whoever else it was...fuck...fucking damn it...”

“It has to be here.” Mukawa said, panicking. “Turn this whole room upside down until you find it! We’re not going back unless we have it, and if we don’t, then we might as well be dead!”

“Mukawa, it’s not here.” Kana said. “There’s a certain schematic when it comes to soul crystal operations. The crystal could only be in one place, the table. Someone snatched him.”

“Which means the external pull from the console to guarantee recovery can’t happen either.”

“No...no, no, no, no, no...” Mukawa hyperventilated.

“The last hope...”

“GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!!!”

The crystal, however, was snatched by someone who had the most personal and even selfish reason to snatch it. She ran outside, under the starless sky...

“I told you I’d get you.”

“You’re not getting away from me this easily, Sakuto.”

Ichika ran as fast as she could, going south-west. She escaped the general area of operations and went inside one of the buildings, a nine-story apartment complex with a flat roof. She climbed up to the top floor. The crystal was still dripping shadows on the ground.

She got into the building before Mukawa got there. And when he did, she climbed out of the window on the top floor and ran away as fast as she could.

“I’ll get you out of this thing.”

“I’m sure you’ll get out on your own, but you’re taking your sweet time there.”

“And I’ll have you all to myself. And we can talk things out...”

What Ichika failed to notice, however, was someone following her. He slowly crept up to the top floor, and broke into the apartment Ichika was hiding in. As Ichika climbed the rusty ladder attached to the top floor’s balcony and went up to the roof, she took a while to take notice of a potential pursuer.

She got her firearm out, but Nacht was faster. He shot her in the hand, knocking Ichika’s handgun down. Another few shots aimed at the handgun decommissioned it completely.

“What a lucky find...” Nacht said, unsheathing his bayonet and tightly holding onto it with his other hand. “I’m gonna have some real fun killing you, you know that?”

“Shit...I have neither weapons, nor soul prowess...”

“The only thing I have...”

“You know, all the insects I managed to kill or have fun with these days, all of them were boring.” Nacht said, approaching Ichika. “Everything is boring, and it fucking sucks. But look at what you have in your hands.”

“It’s something actually worth my time.” Nacht smiled.

Ichika contemplated advancing and fighting, but it would be stupid to rush someone with a knife with your fists. She stayed on the defensive, keeping her distance. She clung onto the crystal as if it was her own heart.

“If my purpose is to serve Lady Aizawa, and I know that life has no purpose, what am I?” Nacht asked, licking his lips. “I want to forget about her. I just want to skin you alive and get that gemstone...and have as much fun with it as I want...”

The crystal started oozing shadows. Part of the shadows enveloped Ichika’s hand and sealed the wound shut.

“What’s that? Can he hear us?” Nacht laughed. “Is this his way of shitting himself out of here? You know, he was defenseless when I got him the first time...”

Nacht shot Ichika in her hand again, as if to mock those shadows. She gasped in pain, but her attention was still captured by the crystal. At last, she truly felt it. And decided to trust it.

The reason Fedor remained close to the soul crystal was because of one of its unique traits. Once the process inside was complete, the only thing left was a little push. Something from the outside to get the person inside out. Since Fedor had access to the console, he could do that with ease.

The pool of shadows grew larger, as if the crystal melted into it. In this case, the little push took place the moment Sakuto sensed Ichika’s soul. Ichika took notice of that. Small cracks began to appear on the crystal, illuminated with a gray hue that was enchanted with droplets of colors.

Nacht, who was at the other edge of the roof, started to quickly advance. And Ichika, in a fit of desperation, threw the crystal at him. Upon impact, the soulful that was inside, was finally unsealed...

“ ✦ Divine Acclamation... ✦ ”

“ ✦ Regretless Soulscape!!! ✦ ”

The world was shaken for a second time.

Every single soulful present in the area would bear witness to Sakuto’s statement. They weren't just stunned, they were straight up paralyzed. But unlike his weaker releases, this time, it was the real deal. Regretless Soulscape at its full power. It was now an acclamation that Sakuto could release with honesty and understanding.

“Nightseer, we’re retreating.” Katya said over the phone.

“What about the pet?”

“I’m definitely not saving that thing!” Katya said. “We gotta run for our lives.”

“The seal is lifted!” Jian exclaimed. She quickly used her soul expression to snipe and destroy the building that caused them so much power. “Quick, advance!”

“I’m connecting to Mr. Kamiki.” Yuuka said.

“What’s the matter?” The response was almost immediate. The question was relayed slowly, as if Kaito already knew the answer.

“Mission successful.” Yuuka said. “He’s free. You probably felt whatever the hell this was just now.”

“I did.” Kaito said. “Excellent job. Give him some space to breathe, take care of him, and return safely. You all did a spectacular job.”

“Especially you, Sakuto.”

“I knew you had it in you.”

“He’s back...” Oskar said, smiling. “He’s fucking back!.”

“This is where Ichika ran off. She should be fine now that he’s free...” Ausra said. “Holy shit, what the actual fuck is this guy’s acclamation?!”

“It’s strong, isn’t it?” Oskar asked with a chuckle. “That’s him. That’s my brother. The strongest fucking soulful in the Heisei!”

The environment around Sakuto was painted gray and blessed with a colorful bliss, the same being true for his iris that regained its strength of will. He stood at the edge of the roof and glanced at Nacht, the mere thought of hesitation forever expunged from his mindscape, replaced by utter concentration with a hateful undertone. The shadows he chose to trust enveloped him and danced like flames to the tunes of the wind that blew at his face. Some of them joined together, conjuring a pair of shadowy wings behind him...

Sakuto utilized the destructive factor of his acclamation to rip apart the buildings that Nacht tried to escape to. Once they were all destroyed, Nacht found himself face to face with a soulful he tried to kill so badly, but now started...fearing?

“What the hell...is this...? Get away from me, or I’ll kill you!” Nacht said. His voice, for the first time in his existence, was shaky. He drew his soul-bound weapon, a katana with a pitch black handle.

“What is this?”

“I can’t bring out...my divine acclamation?!”

“Is it because I’m scared?! No, no no no no no, I’m not scared! If nothing matters, nothing is worth fearing!”"

"I cannot fear sentimental garbage like you!"

Nacht charged at Sakuto, swinging his blade. Sakuto calmly parried his attacks with his own blade and counterattacked, landing a few slashing blows on Nacht’s body. He unsummoned his weapon. Sakuto used his shadows to launch an array of tentacles with sharp edges. The pierced through Nacht’s hands and arms, and later on, restricted his legs. They pinned him onto the half-destroyed wall of a nearby building. Sakuto slowly approached his prey.

“W-what the hell is wrong with you?! I hate you!” Nacht said.

“An experimental soul, isn’t it? Makes sense why it makes zero sense. It’s not a soul, it’s an incohesive amalgamation.”

“Whatever. I’ll fucking kill you.”

The tentacles started stretching Nacht’s limbs apart. The pain was almost unbearable, and Nacht screamed in both agony and fear. Parts of his shoulders and thighs started bleeding, some patches of skin started to open up.

But it appeared that Sakuto applied too much force - the wall behind him was destroyed, and Nacht used the moment to quickly escape the deadly grasp. He summoned his weapon and sliced the shadows apart, before rushing at Sakuto and swinging his blade...

Accelerated adaptation, an ability to dim and detect souls and an option to destroy everything indiscriminately...these were all parts of his acclamation. They were immensely powerful on their own, but they all made sense. There was one more aspect, one more ability hidden among them, however, that made the theoretically impossible happen. It was, in fact, the ability that won the war.

The ability that allowed Sakuto to destroy Otto Richter’s Replicator was the peak of his acclamation, or its so called ‘release’. It was an ability that broke the rules of soulfuls.

It was the divine strength to destroy a soul-bound weapon...

“ ✦ Regretless Soulscape Release... ✦ ”

...and to shatter the part of the soul that was present inside.

“ ✦ Soul Breaker!!! ✦ ”

Sakuto swung Withering Strelitzia and broke Nacht’s soul-bound weapon.

Nacht couldn’t do anything. He couldn't even comprehend what happened. He was now mere prey. Sakuto raised his hand, and a stream of shadows restrained Nacht again. They crucified him on a shadowy cross.

A moment later the shadowy tentacles dug into Nacht’s body. They cracked his nails and toenails open and went into him, causing unbearable pain to Nacht who screamed with no calm. The tentacles grew tiny little blades on them and sawed through Nacht’s insides, almost killing him from the pain itself. They invaded far too deep into his organism, they were bound to kill him. Sakuto raised his weapon and pointed it at Nacht.

“Aleksei...” Sakuto whispered to himself.

“I’m sorry for doing this to your body, but I know you’re no longer in there. All that is left is this filth.”

With one motion, Nacht’s body was ripped apart. Only his severed head remained intact, and Sakuto made sure to stab it with his blade. Everything else was reduced to bits and pieces trying to float on a small pool of blood.

“I feel dizzy...”

“It’s nice to be back...but...I think I know why the old man had-”

He fainted. At least Ichika got there in time to take care of him.