CHAPTER 174: CHAPTER 173: THE WEDDING APOCALYPSE

The world was on fire not literally—well, except for the western gardens, where Seraphina had "accidentally" dropped a meteor during rehearsal—but metaphorically, the world was ablaze with tension.

The night before the wedding, a fragile ceasefire held across the Academy courtyard. A campfire flickered at the center, its smoke curling up into the star-dappled sky. Around it, the brides sat in a ring like predators circling prey.

That prey was Rei Velvet, who sat hunched on a log, chewing the inside of his cheek like a condemned man chewing his last meal.

Drakana tore into a spit-roasted boar with dragon teeth, blood and grease dripping down her chin. Lilia sat opposite her, polishing her staff like a lawyer polishing evidence. Seraphina stood, wings half-furled, halo glowing faintly as if even Heaven couldn’t decide if it was blessing or condemning her. Emilia fiddled with scissors, clipping stray sparks from the fire just to hear them hiss. And Rosette? Rosette calmly carved a wooden coffin figurine, her expression serene.

Velveria, as usual, presided over the chaos like a demonic conductor of a very doomed orchestra. She sat cross-legged on a floating chair of obsidian, sipping wine from a goblet shaped like a screaming skull.

The conversation, predictably, turned murderous.

"So," Drakana said, gnawing bone in half with her teeth, "who gets the honor of killing Velveria before she marries our mate?"

Velveria smiled sweetly. "Aw, you’d kill your future sister-in-law? Touching."

Lilia slammed her staff into the dirt, sparks of holy energy spitting. "No! I shall exorcise her in the name of divine matrimony. Marriage to a demon is heresy!"

Seraphina flared her wings. "Correction: I will smite her in celestial fire. My Rei deserves a heavenly union, not an infernal one!"

Drakana roared back, "Bah! I’ll crush her with my claws!"

Emilia twitched, scissors glinting in the firelight. "No... I’ll slice her dress to ribbons before she reaches the altar. Imagine her shame!"

Rosette’s quiet voice cut through their shouts. "I’ve already laced her bouquet with poison. She won’t even make it past the vows."

The campfire popped and sparks drifted upward.

Rei raised a shaky hand. "...Has anyone considered not killing anyone? Maybe... you know... just letting me live a normal life? Coffee, naps, zero murder?"

Five pairs of glowing eyes turned toward him.

"...No?" he muttered.

[Diplomacy Attempt: Failed.]

[Who needs peace when you’ve got premarital bloodlust?]

As the arguments rose to fever pitch, Rei inched backward, inch by inch, until the shadows of the courtyard swallowed him. The campfire roars dulled. The murderous debates blurred into background noise.

"Almost free," Rei whispered, slipping into the Academy halls. His heart thundered. His palms sweated. "Just need to get out of this madhouse. Maybe fake my death. Maybe join the monks in the north mountains. They don’t care about marriage, right? Right?!"

He tiptoed down the corridor, passing wedding decorations that looked more like preparations for an execution: black roses, crimson ribbons, obsidian candelabras that dripped wax like blood. The floor tiles reflected his terrified face.

Freedom was only twenty steps away then came the voice.

"...You shouldn’t wander at night, Master Rei."

Rei froze. His neck creaked as he turned. Rosette stood at the end of the hallway, veil fluttering though there was no wind. Her eyes glinted like black glass. She tilted her head, listening.

"I could hear your footsteps from the courtyard," she whispered. "Your heartbeat echoes through stone. Do you know how loud you are when you’re afraid?"

"...You tracked me by heartbeat?!" Rei yelped.

Rosette stepped closer, the shadows embracing her like a cloak. "Always. I could find you even if you buried yourself six feet under."

"That’s not reassuring!"

[Attempted Escape Detected.]

[Hunter Bride Active: Rosette.]

[Success Probability: 0%.]

[Next time, try hiding on the moon.]

Rosette reached him in three silent steps and pressed a small vial into his hand. Inside, crimson liquid shimmered.

"What’s this...?" Rei asked, trembling.

"Sleeping draught," Rosette said, voice even. "For you. So you can rest before the ceremony. You need strength."

Rei swallowed. "And if I don’t drink it?"

Her lips curved in the faintest smile. "Then I’ll feed it to you."

"...Right. Bedtime it is." Rei downed the vial with the resignation of a man signing his death warrant.

Dawn arrived like a death sentence. The Academy bells tolled, each chime echoing like nails hammered into a coffin. The entire campus had transformed overnight. Crimson banners draped the walls. Obsidian roses bloomed unnaturally along every pathway. Demonic musicians tuned instruments that wept instead of played.

At the altar of doom—constructed directly in the Academy’s Grand Hall—Velveria stood radiant in a gown of obsidian silk, trimmed with midnight fire. Her veil shimmered like black smoke. Her smile glowed with the satisfaction of ultimate chaos achieved.

"Beloved brother," she purred, "your big day has come."

Rei was not walking down the aisle. He was being wheeled—strapped into a rolling chair of despair, bound with velvet ribbons that looked suspiciously like restraints. His expression was that of a man heading for execution.

[Main Quest Updated: The Demon Wedding.]

[Sub-Objective: "Proceed down the Aisle of Despair."]

[Penalty for Failure: None because failure is inevitable.]

On either side of the aisle, the yanderes assembled. Each one wore a bridal gown.

Lilia’s was radiant white, glowing faintly with sanctified enchantments. Seraphina’s burned with holy fire, forcing servants to run around with buckets of water to keep the drapes from catching. Drakana’s was plated with dragon steel, sparks flaring with every step. Emilia’s gown looked like twelve dresses brutally stitched together, fluttering like a stitched monstrosity. Rosette’s was elegant black lace embroidered with Rei’s name hundreds of times, each stitch like a threat.

They stood in rows, glaring daggers at each other, every smile more homicidal than the last.

The Headmaster—an elderly man whose beard was already singed from yesterday’s meteor mishap—stood trembling at the altar. He raised a staff, surrounding himself in layers of glowing magical shields.

"D-dearly beloved..." he stammered. "...we are gathered here—please don’t kill me—to unite in holy—oh gods I regret this—matrimony..."

The doors slammed shut behind them, locks clicking with a sound like a guillotine blade dropping.

Rei jolted. "...Did someone just lock us in?!"

[Final Event Triggered: Apocalypse Wedding Battle Royale.]

[Rules: Only One Wife Can Win.]

[Optional Rule: Unless they all do.]

[Survival Rate: 0%.]

[Thank you for playing "Who Wants to Be a Widower?"]

The Headmaster barely finished the opening line before the first blast erupted.

Seraphina’s wings spread wide as she conjured fire halos. "By divine right, I claim this groom!"

Drakana roared, her gown shredding as dragon wings burst forth. "Over my dead body, angel!"

Lilia slammed her staff down, chains of holy light whipping around the floor. "Yes, exactly—over YOUR dead bodies!"

Emilia lunged with scissors raised high, screaming, "I’ll cut you all out of the picture!"

Rosette simply stepped forward, eyes calm, drawing an array of hidden blades from her bouquet. "...Begin."

The Grand Hall exploded into chaos. Obsidian pillars cracked. Fire, light, poison, scissors, claws—all collided in a storm of murderous bridal energy. Demons in the audience screamed and scattered. The orchestra kept playing, though, because of contracts.

Rei writhed in his wheeled chair, ribbons tightening as if enjoying his suffering. "STOP THIS! THIS IS A WEDDING, NOT THE END TIMES!"

[Correction: This IS the End Times.]

[Event Title: Wedding Apocalypse.]

[Duration: Until Groom Faints or Explodes.]

The brides clashed in the center, their gowns tattered, eyes blazing, every strike louder than thunder. Velveria sipped her wine at the altar, looking delighted. The Headmaster crouched behind his shields, whimpering.

Rei’s chair rolled helplessly closer to the altar, dragged by enchanted ribbons. His heart hammered, his breath caught and his sanity cracked. The System chimed one last time.

[Apocalypse Wedding Battle Royale Initiated.]

[Condition: Only One Wife Can Win... unless they all do.]

Rei’s scream echoed across the Grand Hall—And the screen of reality itself seemed to fade to black.

Rei’s scream tore through the hall like a battle trumpet, except instead of inspiring armies, it inspired everyone present to fight harder for his hand... or his corpse.

The orchestra, still under contract, shifted seamlessly from "Wedding March" to "Funeral Dirge Polka." Violins screeched. The organ belched smoke. One poor flutist got knocked out by a flying bouquet dagger.

The Headmaster sobbed, "I should’ve retired five years ago..." while adding another twenty shield layers and stuffing a flask into his beard.

Velveria toasted the carnage with her skull goblet. "Ah, love. Nothing is more romantic than wholesale destruction."

Rei’s chair jolted forward another few feet, ribbons pulling him inexorably toward the altar like doom itself had RSVP’d. "WHY IS THIS CHAIR SELF-PROPELLED?!"

[Feature: Groom Delivery System Activated.]

[Efficiency: 92%. Trauma: 200%.]

[Free shipping and handling. Too bad you can’t return yourself.]

The brides crashed together in the center: fire against steel, light against shadow, lace against claws. Every strike rattled the stained-glass windows. Every vow-turned-battlecry shook the hall’s foundations.

"HE IS MINE!" they roared together, each with a different adjective for ownership—holy, eternal, bloody, fiery, poisoned—while Rei’s sanity ticked further into negative numbers.

From the balcony, the Poultry Delegation chanted in unison: "CLUCK IF HE WEDS!" before being incinerated by stray dragonfire.

Rei wailed. "I didn’t even get a cake yet!"

[Cake will be served... at your funeral reception.]

And so began the wedding apocalypse in full.

To be continued...