Surviving the Assassin Academy as a Genius Professor
Chapter 143: DLC [Professor of Hero Stories]: Hotfix Ver2.3.2a(7)
Help me? How?
At this point, when I’ve been pushed so far that I’ve landed in a trash bin, is there still some way left?
A way to connect even to a past version that’s already passed?
│ㅅㅇ)
│ㅇㅅㅇ)
│ ...(ㅇㅅㅇ)
PeepingStar steps out from where it’s always hidden outside the system window.
Then, as an emoji, it starts darting around everywhere.
(ㅇㅅㅇ) is searching....
Then it stops in front of something.
(ㅇㅅㅇ): Found....
It found something.
( ㅇㅅㅇ)[]
Something that, in PeepingStar’s perception, is represented by an empty box.
( ㅇㅅㅇ),,,?[]
Then it tilts its head in confusion.
( ㅇㅅㅇ),,,¿[]
( ㅇㅅㅇ),,?¿[]
It keeps looking confused.
(ㅇㅅㅇ) is troubled.
(ㅇㅅㅇ) doesn’t know how to use []. Because it only ever sneaks around outside.
It’s starting to feel completely useless for something that boasted it would help me. So I took a moment to think too.
What is this []?
(ㅇㅅㅇ) is thinking....
(ㅇㅅㅇ): Hm....
Ah. I get it now.
In the original game, there was a device expressed like that—a machine used by the stars, like a computer, called the “Akashic Record.”
In short, PeepingStar was like an old man who didn’t know how to use a computer.
In that case, I know how to handle it.
But if I try to explain directly, it’ll get spooked and run.
‘I need a way to indirectly communicate my intention to PeepingStar.’
Nowhere in the original game was there any method like that.
PeepingStar was always just portrayed as a suspicious eye watching from afar.
(ㅇㅅㅇ): Hmm..........
(ㅇㅅㅇ): ...Hmm.......
(ㅇㅅㅇ): ......Hmm....
(ㅇㅅㅇ): .........Hmm.
(ㅇㅅㅇ): Hmmm.........hm.
But in this hazy flow of time, its string of “hmms” repeating dozens of times was starting to seriously get on my nerves.
You just have to press the damn button, don’t you know that?
‘Press the power button, you dumbass....’
It was as I was grumbling to myself in irritation.
│ (ㅇㅁㅇ) !
│) =3
It panicked and ran away.
Unbelievable.
What is this, a damn comedy skit?
But somehow, even though the stars are divine beings, they all act like children, so it kind of made sense.
│)
│ㅇ)
It cautiously peeked its head back out.
I hurriedly cleared my mind.
I half-closed my eyes.
│ㅇ) is startled.
│ㅇ) mustn’t wake a sleeping person.
Sleeping person?
Ah.
Right, PeepingStar likes people who are asleep. Because then it can spy freely.
...Wait. Then it must think I’m still asleep.
I got a good idea. I decided to speak as if I were sleep-talking.
‘Mmm... the button... gotta press it... you stupid idiot....’
No idea if this will work,
but I’ve got nothing else.
│ㅇ)
│ㅅㅇ) ?
│ㅅㅇ) The human is sleep-talking.
│ㅇㅅㅇ) ???
│ㅇㅅㅇ) Now that I think about it, here’s a button.
│ㅇㅅㅇ) ‘Click’
│ㅇωㅇ) smiles. [] is booting up.
Nice.
The bastard found the answer.
I can’t use the stars’ device, and PeepingStar is a tech-illiterate fool, but together we can do it.
Like a blind man and a cripple helping each other.
‘Search... platform... zzz...’
(
Once we got the hang of it, everything started moving smoothly.
‘Search... Hiaka Academy...’
(
‘2.1.5... version... download...’
(
‘No, not that one...’
(ㅇωㅇ )?[]
‘Zzz...’
(ㅇωㅇ )a[]
‘Lower...’
(
(
(
⋮
After repeating the search a few more times, PeepingStar seemed to have found something in the Akashic Record.
Two rooms of information had been revealed.
What we were looking for seemed to be in one of them.
Shouldn’t be a problem.
We’ll just open both.
Or so I thought.
(
( ㅇㅅㅇ)[]
Its expression hardened.
What now?
(ㅇㅅㅇ) is troubled.
(ㅇㅅㅇ) has only one Star Fragment it can use.
Why?
Because of (ㅇㅅㅇ)’s ruined sense of economic planning. It failed to save properly.
I’m gonna lose it.
Using the “Akashic Record” requires Star Fragments, and the bastard only had one left.
But we had found two “final rooms.”
(ㅇㅅㅇ) has no choice.
(ㅇㅅㅇ) decides to borrow from the “sleeping one’s” pocket.
The bastard quietly approaches me.
As a true peeping pervert, it doesn’t even register it as stealing.
(ㅇㅅㅇ) ....
Problem is,
(ㅇㅅㅇ) is disappointed.... The “sleeping one’s” pocket holds not a single Star Fragment.
...It was because I used up all my Star Fragments earlier to call on FortuneStar□.
(ㅇㅅㅇ),,, in short, the “sleeping one” was a pauper. (ㅇㅅㅇ) is speechless at his abysmal financial habits....
Unbelievable. This little shit.
Who are you to talk...
Anyway, so we’re stuck with one coin.
PeepingStar deliberates between two final rooms:
Brown-eared Bulbul
Hiaka Academy Ver 2.1.5 RIP Download
Only one chance.
(ㅇㅅㅇ) ....
With just a single coin, PeepingStar hesitates before choosing.
‘Bulbul?’
Brown-eared Bulbul? That’s a sketchy folder name.
Also, the “rip version download” sounds suspicious too.
( ㅇㅅㅇ)☞
It hesitantly reaches for one of the two.
Its hand moves toward the rip version.
The moment the finger approached and the preview popped up, I accidentally sneezed.
(ㅇㅁㅇ) !?
Stop. Absolutely not that one!
───
【Preview】 HiakaAcademy RIP version 2.1.5 download HiakaAcademy RIP version 2.1.5 download It seemed like it would be there. It was truly an overwhelming thrill. Thank you, Bond. Thanks to you, I feel so relieved now. HiakaAcademy RIP version 2.1.5 download No need to thank me. Kim smiled and reached out his hand. Nicola responded with a joyful handshake......
───
It’s not the rip version! That junk brings me back to the days fifteen years ago when no one gave a shit about copyright. Rip version downloads were always clickbait, and they never actually contained the files!
‘Bulbul... hmm....’
(ㅇㅁㅇ) ??
(ㅇㅁㅇ) ...
(ㅇㅂㅇ) is strangely tempted to choose Bulbul.
You really can’t tell I’m awake, huh.
Anyway, at the end of this clumsy three-legged race—
│ωㅇ) has discovered [Ver 2.1.5 RIP Version]!
We had reached our destination.
[Downloading HiakaAcademy Ver2.1.5 RIP Version]
Finally.
The past that the System⧉ was so desperate to keep hidden.
It pierced into my mind in the form of a glowing blue dot, carrying the [Stigma] of PeepingStar│ㅅㅇ).
Download in progress...... 0.01%
At the same time, from the downloaded portion, a version name surfaced.
‘Ah, this is.......’
I couldn’t hide my surprise.
There was a powerful hint as to why the System⧉ was so mortified—and why Adele had so many odd reactions: like getting furious at the claw machine or the sexualized depictions of women. It didn’t need much explanation.
Just the version’s name was enough.
Ver2.1.5... Hiaka Academy (Subculture Character Collection Ver)
Ah.
***
Let’s summarize.
Ver1 was a computer game.
Ver2 is the world of possession like the one we’re in now.
Looking closer at Ver2—
Ver2.3 is the current build.
Ver2.2 remains unknown.
Ver2.1 was a character-collection type game world that included Adele. A world where pretty and cool characters were drawn in gacha rolls. My guess is, Adele was one of the characters who waited to be summoned by someone there.
‘......So it takes a world-shaking change to shift from 2.1 to 2.2 to 2.3.’
For example.
If Korea is 2.3,
Then Joseon is 2.2,
And Goryeo is 2.1......
‘If that were all, this would just be a past world.’
But.
‘For some reason, the past and present are starting to link together.’
It’s like saying Admiral Yi Sun-sin showed up during the Trump administration riding a “Turtle Aircraft Carrier.”
‘I’ll need to take my time understanding all this.’
⋮
How much time passed after that?
If I had to guess, the judgment of the stars had taken place, and a verdict had been handed down by Transcendence✯.
In the meantime, PeepingStar│ㅅㅇ)—a being who exists purely to witness others' breakdowns—seemed to have run off to the System⧉ to spill everything that happened.
When I came to, I was back in [Offline]. The fake Dino lowered his head and said,
“We were wrong...”
The usual smirking attitude was gone. He looked sullen. Probably got chewed out badly.
Then he added that he’d been punished by Transcendence✯ and held liable for reparations.
“Reparations?”
“Yeah. We have to return 100 Star Fragments, plus the 327 that you used......”
“Only 100? After dragging things this far?”
“...We want to give more, but anything more would break the balance of the world... and since we chose ‘rollback’ as the follow-up response, we’re running short on resources...”
The bastard was on the verge of tears.
So it’s a ‘rollback’...
From the System’s point of view, that must’ve been a painful decision.
It takes an insane amount of effort, from what I know.
“They also told me to deliver a sincere apology.”
“Elaborate.”
“We interfered way too much with the Overworld just to cover our internal affairs. Of course, Adele was a potential threat, so some interference was necessary. But our method was wrong. We caused you a lot of harm because of it... We sincerely ask for your forgiveness.”
Then the fake Dino bowed flat to the ground.
“...But can I maybe make one request?”
“Speak.”
“As I understand it, you’ve now gained access rights to 2.1.5. If possible, could you maybe... not go into it?”
“.......”
“It’s just... that version is a really embarrassing part of our past...”
“I refuse.”
“.......”
“Anything else?”
“No. I’m sorry.”
I turned my back. Toward the portal to the [Overworld] that had opened behind me. Then, something came to mind, and I said,
“Three thousand.”
“Huh?”
“Give me 3,000 Star Fragments, and I won’t look at version 2.1.5. I promise.”
“W-What?! That’s insane...! That would completely throw off the world’s balance...!”
“I don’t give a damn about the balance of the world. I care only about my own survival and happiness. Go fetch them. Before the download finishes. Or I’m connecting to 2.1.5.”
“.......”
Then suddenly, I got a hunch, and I whipped around. Fake Dino was holding up his middle finger in shock.
“Five thousand.”
“...Wh-What?!”
“Tell your master this: because you flipped me off, it’s 5,000 now.”
“W-Wait...!”
“And you. Change yourself back into Dino. If next time I see that face of yours again, 2.1.5 or not, I’ll go on a rampage and obliterate every last thing in the Overworld related to the System⧉.”
“I-I’ll change back! I’m sorry, okay? But 5,000 is really...! ...Hyung......!!”
Ignoring him, I stepped through the portal.
And just like that, the chaotic hotfix came to an end.
***
“Old man ★ 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ★ hates humans.”
“...Why?”
“Why else? For being so lowly and yet holding far too much power. There’s no other race that lies to itself that much. So you should learn to hate humans too.”
“I like humans...”
“I said hate them.”
“...But I like them...”
A chilly but sunny weekend afternoon.
Some time had passed since the rollback. I was putting my tangled affairs back in order.
“Would everyone like some food?”
First things first—we ate.
“But why are you suddenly cooking now?”
“I’ve been buried in research so long my head was spinning. Just wanted to get some air. Anyway, how does it taste?”
The taste...
“.......”
It was horrible. The stew was sweet. Like she swapped sugar and salt.
“Eh? Where are you all going? You should finish your meal...!”
I glanced over and saw Cain and Abeltus quietly trying to slip away.
“Hehe... I’m, uh... full...”
“Old man hates humans, and thus hates human food...”
And yet Ran was eating heartily.
“Oh dear, is it really okay?”
“It’s delicious.”
“Really?”
Then I remembered how Ran had dipped her finger in engine oil the other day and said it had a nice flavor. ‘......’ Yeah.
After that, I suggested she slightly adjust her research topic. She accepted without hesitation.
Next, I called Adele over and made a request—as a friend.
“A request?”
“Don’t fight with Ran.”
“Huh? Of course not~ Why would we fight? I’m super grateful she ate my soup.”
“And don’t use the ‘Curse of Instant Death.’”
“.......”
That must be the kind of expression you make when you slam your forehead into a wall.
Adele stared blankly at me, then gave a forced smile.
“...You knew, huh.”
I calmly accepted her secret.
“Don’t use it.”
“...Okay.”
“This isn’t just a verbal request. If you honor my request, I’ll put more weight behind your thesis. And when the new semester begins, I’ll recommend you for an assistant professorship.”
“What?”
Adele’s eyes widened.
“Whaaat...!?”
I had hesitated until now because I wasn’t fully sure whether she was a threat or not. But after everything that happened, I was convinced.
Adele posed almost no threat.
‘Except for just two unknowns.’
Adele Muang of Kreutz, and the origin of the ‘Curse of Instant Death.’ Those were still unanswered questions.
⋮
Download in progress...... 1.2%
⋮
That, too, should have its answer within this.
One way or another.
“Waaaah, what do I even do now...!?”
Adele was jumping for joy.
Then she ran over to the old man, the child, and Ran, and bragged.
She got a round of applause from all three.
⋮
The cold spell passed, and the seasons rolled on.
I regrouped with the Dante Assassins and resumed training. The kids poured themselves into fundamental combat drills without pause.
Winter break was drawing to a close. And soon—
The true betting table would open.
Our Dante Assassins—
Would begin robbing the casino known as the Empire.