CHAPTER 434: PAIN EQUALS LOVE

"...Lady Aokitsu, what should we do?" a maid asks as I enter a room holding Pandora’s daughter. I keep her firmly in my arms because she’s squirming.

"First, we’ll deal with the food." I studied a great deal; Freya made me learn all sorts of things, even about Pandora, and one easy thing to notice is that Pandora and her children need a lot of food at the beginning, so Lycoris must want food too.

"I’m not sure what she can eat, so I want you to prepare milder, lighter meals, preferably nothing too hard, and mainly using meat." Considering she’s Pandora’s daughter and a dragon, meat should be best.

"Also, find someone to take her measurements, since Pandora requested it." While they do that, I need to decide what to do with the room Lycoris will stay in. However, considering Pandora, it’s better to put Lycoris in a room near Pandora’s and leave the most important decisions for Pandora herself.

"I’ll wait here now, so be quick." I say, closing the door and setting Lycoris down on the floor. She quickly runs off, darting around the room and looking at everything that seems even slightly interesting for a while. I hear the maids leaving as I turn to look at the room.

’This one should do...’ The room is large, isn’t being used, and is close to Pandora’s room. I walk over to the window and see that it’s well reinforced and sturdy, so there’s no risk of Lycoris escaping through here.

I heard Freya and Elena talking about Azazel, and apparently Azazel really likes to run away and dash all over the place, so maybe Lycoris will do the same. That’s why I need to ensure the room is hard to escape from.

"...KYAAA??!!!" I let out a scream when I feel an unpleasant pain in my tail. I spin around and see Lycoris biting my tail. She has a firm, strong bite, clinging onto my tail.

"..." By instinct, I think about pulling her off quickly, but with the strength of her bite, if I try, I’ll hurt her. And if I hurt her, Pandora will kill me. Tears of pain stream down my face because my tail is sensitive.

I try walking around the room to see if she’ll let go, but she maintains her bite and is dragged along by me. Even when I shake my tail, she doesn’t let go, only clamping down even harder.

"If you weren’t Pandora’s daughter, I’d throw you out the window for the disrespect... How far I’ve fallen... From leader of a race to a child’s babysitter." I sit down on the bed, disappointed with myself.

I’ve fallen so low... My people don’t even respect me anymore. When I go out on the street, other beast-men in general look at me like I’m a traitor for being submissive to Pandora.

Even though it’s a rule that when we lose in a battle of that type, we have to submit to the winner, I think the fact that I bet the entire race on that war is what made the others hate and despise me.

And it really hurts. I did what I thought was best for my people, and all I got was their anger and hatred while I lost my freedom.

’It’s so unfair...’ I didn’t know about these things. I was uneducated despite my age. I only started learning things when I began living in this castle. Freya made me understand many things, and my many mistakes during the war.

"..." I look at the girl attached to my tail. She starts chewing on my tail. It hurts, but it doesn’t cause serious injury. I’m much stronger than her, so it’s just unpleasant.

After a few minutes of this, she finally realizes she can’t eat it, so she stops biting and spits out the fur that came loose. She sticks her tongue out, trying to remove the strands of fur from my tail.

"Great, now that..." I was about to speak, but she leaps onto my arm and bites down, fixing herself to my arm and sticking to it. I see her teeth; they’re quite sharp for a baby who’s a newborn.

She lets out small growls while staring at me with a challenging look, as if she could devour me starting with my arm.

"...Haaa..." I let out a sigh. I see this is going to take a long time yet. Looking at this, it’s obvious she won’t give up trying to eat me, and she’ll fail because my resistance is high.

"Do what you want." I say, not caring about it anymore. It won’t make a difference, and at least it’s better than having to search for her if she ran away.

...

...

...

"Okay Zephyra, finished?" I ask Zephyra, who is still sucking and licking my tail. She finally starts to pull her mouth away when I ask.

"I-I’m done..." She speaks as if it were strange to have the authority to stop eating, since before my tail would leave on its own instead of her being able to stop when she was satisfied.

"Great, how do you feel?" I ask, getting up from the bed and looking at her. I take the two trays of food that I know she won’t eat and throw them on the floor for the shadow sharks to eat.

’At least she doesn’t react to my voice, or it would be horrible to fix that.’ I think about what to do while staring at Zephyra. She looks "fine," but she isn’t really well.

’Maybe letting Zephyra take care of Lycoris alone will help a little with this.’ I rub my eyelids, thinking of thousands of ways to deal with this, but none are guaranteed to work.

’Bringing Tsukuyomi seems like the best option.’ Zephyra needs stability that I can’t give because I can’t touch her and I’m the source of her trauma. Staying too close will only stagnate any progress.

"Zephyra, would you like to go for a walk? Or would you like some ice cream?" I ask, trying to get her back to normal. Maybe going outside and trying the ice cream she likes so much will help.

"N-No..."

"I see... that’s fine... whatever you wish, my queen. However, I won’t be able to spend much time with you soon, so we’ll have to make the most of the time we have now." I say honestly, though disappointed she refused.

’Ice cream seemed like a good option... What a pity she refused...’ It’s soft, so she wouldn’t have to chew and could eat without worry.

"..." We stay silent for a while, her staring at me and me at her. She seems to be thinking about something, her face blushing, breathing with short sighs that somehow sound lewd.

She seems anxious and tense with nothing happening, and I think about what to do in this situation.

"P-Pandora... can we..." She tries to speak but trails off, as if asking me for something is wrong.

"You can ask, Zephyra. I’ll do whatever you want." During the pregnancy, she could never ask for anything, and if she did, she was hurt, so it makes sense she’s afraid to ask for things now.

"..."

"I-I feel empty... it’s hot and... it’s strange..." She speaks while blushing, opening her legs. I see her panties are soaked and wet, making clear what she wants even without asking directly.

’...Would having relations now go against her mental healing? Or would stopping abruptly just make everything worse?’ I ponder the weight of the two choices.

"...We can do it for today, but in return, I need you to try to leave the room tomorrow and take a walk outside, at least for a little while." I’m going to fetch Tsukuyomi and Eclipsya tomorrow, so I can’t have Zephyra stuck here.

I’ll also make it clear that the maids and Aokitsu must keep an eye on Zephyra to see if she falls into some strange collapse.

"T-Thank you..." She murmurs as I approach her. I extend my hands to touch her, but I stop briefly. However, to have something, I need to touch her, so I try to at least be gentle.

I gently touch her hips, and just that makes her tremble and stick her tongue out, breathing erratically. But I move my tail to her pussy, fitting it inside her, slowly pushing in until it’s inside her.

"Aahhhh..." She lets out a comfortable moan as if this were something she had been waiting for for a long time. Her breathing stabilizes a little, even though her pussy is completely drenched.

’She’s still as tight as always...’ It’s pleasant, but it’s not for me to enjoy; it’s just to give her some calm right now.

I hug her, a gentle and calm hug, something she hasn’t had for a long time. I look at her hands; she seems to want to hug me back, but her hands tremble and she pulls them away as if touching me were wrong.

"I love you, Zephyra." When I say that, I feel her tears dripping onto my shoulder. Her crying intensifies, and she gives sighs she tries to hide, as if even crying were wrong.

"Y-You... still love me?" she asks tearfully, a doubt that actually hurts me a little, since it’s as if she doubts my love despite all the proofs of love I’ve given her.

’Still?...’

"I never stopped loving you... I love you so much." I say, stroking her back. She still has her draconic parts visible, so I see her tail wagging on the bed.

"C-Can we... stay like this?" she asks, trying to establish some control, however minimal.

"Yes, we can, my love." I agree with her.

"...Could you say... that you love me?" she asks in a broken tone, as if asking for this were a crime.

"I love you."

"..."

"I love you, Zephyra. I can say that as many times as you want." I try to speak in the gentlest way I can, stroking her despite her tremors.

"...Really?"

"Yes, I really love you."

"..."

"Can we... stay like this... for a while?" she asks again while I patiently play with her hair.

"Of course, for as long as it takes."

"..."

"..." She just starts to cry silently, a different cry from before, and I just comfort her calmly and patiently to prove my love to her.

"...P-Pandora... it doesn’t hurt..." She speaks with a disappointed tone, which makes me freeze as I start to look at her emotions; it’s a real mess covered in desperation.

’She wants me to hurt her?’ I wonder what’s going on in her mind, but she seems disappointed, sad, and even deceived because I’m being gentle.

’In that cave, she said she loved me despite the pain...’ It seems things are very wrong here. She shouldn’t have to feel pain to think that I love her.

"...G-Gahh" I grab her throat and squeeze hard, making her choke. Her breathing accelerates, her heart beats wildly while her pussy tightens. Normally, this would be bad.

But a deep blush appears on her cheeks as the color of her emotions is covered by lust and love. She gives a happy smile as if she’s finally receiving the "words" of love she was seeking.

’...Is this it?... Has our relationship been reduced to pain to show love?’ I feel irritated and frustrated as I release her throat. She collapses on the bed with a satisfied smile, as if she had received an incredible romantic declaration.

The look of satisfaction on her face is what irritates me the most. I know it’s my fault she’s like this, but for her to reduce my love to the same thing as violence is simply unpleasant.

’Damn that Yandere Pandora.’ She is responsible for the body; she should have managed to make things smoother for Zephyra.

Zephyra finally moves with some courage, but it’s only to take my hands and place them on her neck.

"D-Do you love me?" she asks while I squeeze my hands tightly around her neck, leaving marks and making her gag.

"Yes, my queen, I love you very much." I say, watching the aura of her emotions intensify even more and her orgasming just from that. If she wants it to be like this, then it’s fine by me.

"And you, my queen, will you obey me faithfully?" My more sadistic side emerges in this.

"Y-Yes... I-I love you... aaahhh"

"I didn’t ask that." I squeeze harder, rubbing the tip of my tail against her womb.

"I-I will... o-obey," she says as I decide on the approach she must take.

"That’s right, my love. You must always obey me because I know what’s best." If she wants to be hurt, then I’ll hurt her to prove my love as many times as necessary, and I’ll use that to slowly get her accustomed to not needing pain anymore.

It’s easier to force her to obey with pain than to try to fix her all at once. As long as she obeys, I can just keep giving orders and pleasure to help her brain return to normal.

She looks at me lovingly, making it clear that she doesn’t want autonomy. It’s not that she can’t, but to protect herself, her mind has decided it’s better not to do things alone and just obey. This is her comfort zone.