The Girl Wants to Be Murdered
Chapter 51
TL/Editor: Butter Cat
Status: 4/week mon-thurs
Illustrations: none
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〈 Chapter 51 〉 Chapter 51. Truth.
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If someone were to ask me what my position was at the academy, at the Museion, I probably wouldn''t be able to answer right away.
But if they kept asking, I would eventually answer, after much deliberation, that I was a ''mercenary''.
...It''s just too vague, you see.
Officially, I was a student enrolled at the Museion, but I didn''t bear any of the obligations that other students typically had, like paying tuition fees.
Rather, I was on the receiving end, getting paid regularly like a salary.
In exchange, you could say, I had to lead or teach certain classes, but that''s beside the point.
For instance, just like now.
"—Therefore, today, we''ll start with a brief explanation from Miss Han, and then proceed with the lesson using the textbook."
"....Yes."
I had gotten used to this by now, so I got up from my seat, carefully moving my chair back without making a sound.
Eyes, eyes, eyes.
As I was met with a barrage of stares from a dozen or so pairs of eyes, I forced my trembling legs to move, walking towards the front of the classroom.
‘Sis… Are you sure you’ll be okay…?’
‘Hehe! Don''t worry, Alice. Just trust this big sis!!''
‘.....You, idiot.’
In my mind, I recall Alice''s worried expression as she saw me off.
And behind her, Saelli, giving me a disappointed look as I boasted.
Honestly, it didn''t seem like I could fall any lower… But as an older sister, I couldn''t show any weakness, so I responded to Alice with a confident voice.
Completely oblivious to the fact that I was about to ride a roller coaster to hell.
So, what would I say if I could go back to that time?
.....Hmm.
—Alice, save me....!!!
—I lied when I said I was okay…!!
—I want to go back…!!
…I''d probably say something like that.
Really.
Why didn''t I stay with the lovely Alice instead of coming here alone?
Ever since I arrived, I''ve been kicking myself every day, regretting my decision, but there''s no way to turn back time.
History has no room for "what ifs."
The only thing that exists here is my ''will'' to teach this class....
The only thing that awaits me is, my own doom...!!
"…Uh… um, first of all, mercenaries are often hired for their highly skilled and specialized roles(?), such as cavalry or archers. The famous Buhur cavalry, is one such example."
Ueueueueueue....
I don''t even know what I''m talking about, but I somehow managed to compose my trembling voice and continued the lesson with a straight face.
Is this loud enough…?
It... it should be...right?
While keeping an eye on people''s reactions, I kept swallowing my saliva, worried that they might notice my trembling voice and quickening intonation as I spewed out my explanation.
…Though it seemed the teacher next to me had seen through everything.
Her face was composed, maintaining the image of a stern teacher, but up close, I could see the amusement in her slightly raised eyebrows and the corner of her lips clearly revealing her true feelings.
To think earning money would be this difficult.
An intense reality check, something I had never experienced before, hit me.
"They don’t count lancers by the ‘head’, but rather, group them into ‘lance’ units, and contracts are actually signed per ‘lance’ as well. The reason is… For one lancer to exist, they need at least five assistants and attendants—"
"""..........."""
This attention is too overwhelming.
Truthfully, I''m just a beginner, who hasn''t even been doing this for a year.
Truthfully, I''m ashamed to even be called a mercenary.
Truthfully, I only got this opportunity because the personalities of other mercenaries my age were all messed up.
But they seemed to be mesmerized by my ''mercenary'' title, and every time I stood at the podium, the intense gazes following me only added to my burden.
I just came to the academy to slack off, thinking it would be a cushy job, after listening to my seniors.
There was a reason everyone had smiled and seen me off…!
But even as my insides were turning upside down in real-time, there was a separate reason that was really destroying me inside.
"........."
Looking here, looking there.
This way, that way.
There was someone observing my every move, as if trying to search for something,
You could call it paranoia, but my intuition, honed from my past experiences, was telling me it was true.
That she was watching me intently.
Those shifty, seemingly out-of-place (??) eyes, what are they so desperately trying to find in me?
A gaze that some might welcome, or some might even be happy about.
But for me, who had felt a deep sense of unease towards her from the moment we first met, it was anything but welcoming.
I had also been startled and terrified when I heard that she would be in the same classroom as me.
And I had thought that I should never let Alice and her meet, no matter what.
Because.
Her name was Remi Akaia.
The princess of the Tesillia Kingdom and a student at the same academy as me.
And—
—Alice''s real family.
"....The word ''Freelancer'', was also coined from this—"
A shudder runs through my body.
Why can''t anything in the world flow smoothly?
I continued the lesson, my heart filled with complaints.
By the way.
Only after ten minutes, was I finally freed.
Hiiing.
**
The crack of dawn, when kind children like Alice would have been fast asleep.
Bad adults who were neither kind nor a child, the kind you could find anywhere, were wandering in the cold, damp night air, treading on dew-wet grass.
Just walking, wherever their feet took them.
With no destination in mind, aimlessly.
"....You know what I''m going to say, right?"
"......."
Except for the chirping of insect, it was an incredibly quiet dawn in the forest.
A perfect silence, so serene it felt like it would be a shame to break it.
In it, I was the one who opened the dialogue first.
Well, I was the one who woke this person up and brought them out here in the first place.
The cruel monster who had mercilessly devoured the villagers that had attacked Alice.
And the person Alice called ''Big Sis Elli'', the one she followed like a real family.
Saelli.
She was standing beside me now.
"—Speak, Saelli. No, please tell me. What happened to Alice in the past?"
With a mix of anger, fear, and sadness in my voice. I asked her.
"......."
But she didn''t react to my question at all, just looking up at the empty sky.
With a resigned expression, as if she had finally accepted what was to come.
She stared at the invisible stars, the night sky above us, painted a dark grey by the thick clouds that had gathered.
The confrontation between me and her.
It had all started when I took a bath with Alice.
It’s embarrassing to admit, but I was learning basic swordsmanship from Alice, who was physically handicapped.
When Alice first offered to teach me swordsmanship, I was skeptical and watched with worry, but the moment I saw her swordsmanship, as if the sword was alive, I was mesmerized, and before I knew it, I was doing push-ups as she instructed.
…Well, I have my own fantasies too, you know.
Swish, swish, like that. Swish! You know what I mean.
Of course, the sword she wielded with one hand didn''t seem to carry much force, but even to a beginner like me, the sharp trajectory the sword left behind was high level.
Especially since the person who did it had a ''Huh, this works?’ look on her face.
Well, that''s how it happened.
After that, it was simple.
Saelli, as a precautionary measure, would always be present during my lessons, and I was growing steadily under Alice''s tutelage.
In fact, her teaching was so detailed and easy to understand that even a beginner like me could grasp it.
They say effort is often expressed through blood and sweat, right?
Thanks to that, Alice and I would both be covered in sweat after each training session.
So usually, Alice would take a bath first while I continued training, and then I would go in after her...
But that day was different.
We were both tired, so we decided to cut the training short and take a bath together.
Of course, Alice said that I would be uncomfortable seeing her body and offered to let me wash first, but I insisted it was okay and grabbed her wrist, and we entered the bathroom together—
And that became the root of the problem.
"...The uneven surface of her wrist. Seeing it up close, it was clearly a ''bite mark''. And then, I remembered what Alice had told me before."
"......."
"I don''t want to believe it, but I have to ask."
Of course, it would be a lie to say I wasn''t prepared.
I already knew that Alice didn''t have a wrist, having lived with her, and I also knew that her body was covered in countless scars, hidden by her clothes, memories that were etched into my mind.
So I thought I would be okay.
But as always, I was stupid, an idiot who couldn''t control herself.
The first time.
When I saw Alice''s naked body, without a single thread of clothing, right in front of me, my previous resolve crumbled, and my mind went blank, I couldn''t think straight.
I was so grateful that my body, which had instinctively turned her around so she couldn''t see my face and embraced her from behind, was functioning properly.
''…Sis?''
''… Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.''
Scars,
Scars,
And, more scars.
Her body was covered in scars.
Even when Alice softly called out my name, I didn''t answer, afraid that she would notice the tremor in my voice, I just stayed still.
Muttering apologies, which would never reach her.
It was sad and pathetic.
Why. That question wouldn''t leave my head.
The scar that ran across her stomach, reaching her back, I couldn''t even imagine what kind of pain she must have endured to get that.
There was a spot on her calf, where the flesh had been gouged out, as if someone had dug into it with something sharp, so deep that I could see through it with my own eyes.
And when I saw her wrist, the clear bite marks of something, I realized I had opened Pandora''s Box, a box that should have remained sealed.
To that extent, the wounds I saw directly with my own eyes, right in front of me, came as too great a shock to me.
Enough to make me instinctively turn my head away.
''......!!'' S~ea??h the NovelFire.net* website on Google to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.
I desperately tried to suppress the urge to vomit.
After a long struggle, when I finally came to my senses, my gaze was fixed on something else, anything but Alice''s body.
At least it was a relief that Alice was still embraced in my arms, so she didn''t see me looking away from her body.
Yes.
I had, once again, made the same mistake.
That''s why I had to know.
To prevent myself from repeating that mistake.
Even if what I''m peering into is just a part of an abyss with no visible end.
I had to know.
"Tell me everything."
"........"
Alice''s past.
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