The Young Miss Refuse To Love
Chapter 155: The truth
CHAPTER 155: THE TRUTH
Qi Jianyi’s eyes widened in shock, disbelief washing over her like a cold wave. "How...?" she murmured, the word barely escaping her lips.
Her gaze trembled with a mixture of fear and confusion. How could her mother possibly know that name? It was a name she had never spoken aloud. A name belonging to someone who, as far as the world was concerned, does not exist here.
A name she had locked away so tightly, to the point that she sometimes doubted its reality herself.
So how could Mother Qi possibly know?
"What? Are you asking me how I know that name?" her mother asked, her tone shifting into something firmer—more serious.
"Tell me, Jianyi. Who is this Song Chengfeng?" Her voice lowered, now heavy with concern and insistence.
Still too stunned to respond, Qi Jianyi opened her mouth, but no sound came. She knew she couldn’t lie to her mother—not about this. So instead, she bowed her head, letting her hair fall to cover her expression, hiding the pain that flickered in her eyes.
"Where... where did you hear his name?" she finally asked, her voice barely above a whisper, trembling as if the name alone had weakened her.
The stronger her reaction, the deeper Mother Qi’s curiosity grew. Who was this man—this Song Chengfeng—who haunted her daughter’s sleep and made her soul look worn with sorrow?
"Sometimes, in the middle of the night, you cry in your sleep," Mother Qi explained gently, "and you keep calling out his name. Your father and I, we’ve both heard it. It’s been years, Jianyi. Don’t you lie to me now. I want the truth. Who is this man?" Mother Qi had been holding back this question for so long, choosing silence over confrontation.
Every time she saw her daughter wear that lifeless expression or sit quietly with hollow eyes, she wanted to ask. But she hadn’t—until now.
"Who is Song Chengfeng?" she pressed again, her voice calm but resolute.
The moment his name was spoken again, Qi Jianyi’s lips parted. Her expression shifted. It was subtle but unmistakable—an avalanche of emotions surfacing all at once: sorrow, yearning, guilt.
Her eyes reddened as tears brimmed, threatening to spill.
"Song Chengfeng..." she repeated, as if saying his name made him real again—made all the memories come flooding back.
"Song Chengfeng..." she whispered once more. This time, the dam broke. Tears streamed down her cheeks as soft sobs escaped her lips. Unable to contain the pain any longer, she collapsed into her mother’s arms, hiding her face in her embrace.
Mother Qi’s eyes widened at her daughter’s sudden breakdown. The sternness she held moments ago melted into gentle concern. Wrapping her arms tightly around her child, she comforted her silently, heart aching.
"Why are you crying like this, my girl? Is it that painful... just to speak about him?" she asked softly.
Qi Jianyi gave a small nod, unable to find her voice amidst the sobs. It was as if years of buried emotions had cracked open, spilling out the grief she had tried so hard to ignore.
For the first time in a long while, she let herself cry freely—cry for everything she had lost and everything she still couldn’t let go of.
Knowing her daughter had been bottling her emotions for so long, Mother Qi chose not to press further. She simply held her, allowing Qi Jianyi to cry until her pain eased. It didn’t matter who that man was.
What mattered to her, as a mother, was that someone had made her daughter suffer this much.
No parent in the world could bear to watch their child crumble—especially when that child, once so vibrant and full of life, now looked empty, constantly lost in thought.
Qi Jianyi wept for a long time, until her tears dried and her eyes became red and puffy. Only then did she slowly pull herself away from her mother’s embrace, lifting her sleeve to wipe away the remnants of her sorrow.
"Mom..." she called out, her voice soft and hoarse.
"I’m here, Jianyi," Mother Qi replied gently, her tone soothing, full of unwavering love and patience.
"Will you believe what I’m about to say?" Qi Jianyi asked hesitantly, her gaze wavering. When her mother first mentioned Song Chengfeng, the weight of his memory hit her with full force.
She realised just how much she missed him. And that pain—deep, quiet, relentless—had become even more unbearable because she had no one to share it with.
Sometimes, she even questioned whether he was real at all, or just a beautiful figment of her imagination.
"You are my daughter. If I, your own mother, won’t believe you, then who else in this world will?" Mother Qi replied firmly, clearly upset at the thought that her daughter had been carrying such a heavy burden alone.
She had never doubted her daughter, and it pained her to think that Qi Jianyi felt she couldn’t confide in her.
Whatever had happened between her and this Song Chengfeng must have hurt her deeply—so deeply that she had chosen silence for all these years.
"Song Chengfeng..." Qi Jianyi began softly, her voice tinged with nostalgia, "was a man who liked me—a lot." A faint smile played on her lips as she lowered her eyes. The sorrow in her expression slowly gave way to warmth as she recalled him.
"He was arrogant. Always acted like he didn’t care, like the world didn’t matter to him—but around me, he was completely different. He’d follow me around, pestering me with that smug look on his face." She let out a soft chuckle at the memory.
"Sometimes I wondered how someone so cold to everyone else could act so soft, even cute, when it came to me. When everyone made assumptions about who I was, he was the only one who ever asked. Really asked. He wanted to know me—what I liked, what I dreamed of, what I feared." Her voice trembled slightly, but her smile grew.
"Even when he realised that what I wanted in life would eventually lead us down separate paths... he didn’t walk away. He stayed. He insisted on loving me anyway, in whatever time we had."
As she spoke, the light in her eyes flickered brighter. She wasn’t just reminiscing—she was reliving every moment. The man she remembered wasn’t flawless, but to her, he had been home. The one person who saw her as more than the young miss of the Qi family.
To Song Chengfeng, she was just Qi Jianyi.
A place where he could be soft, vulnerable. A safe place to fall.
"But he hurt you," Mother Qi interjected gently, unable to suppress her concern.
Her brows furrowed. It didn’t make sense—how could someone who meant so much to her daughter also be the cause of her tears?
"If he truly loved you, why would he let you cry like that?"
Qi Jianyi shook her head slowly, as if to dismiss the thought.
"No, Mom," she said firmly. "It wasn’t him who hurt me."
She looked up, meeting her mother’s eyes. Her voice trembled slightly as she continued, "I was the one who hurt him."
She drew in a shaky breath, swallowing back the lump in her throat. "I ruined us. It had nothing to do with him."
Then, barely above a whisper, she added, "He only ever loved me."
"I should’ve stuck to my decision," Qi Jianyi whispered, wiping the fresh tears from her eyes. "But I got greedy. I accepted his love even though I knew I shouldn’t have. Mom... even at the very end, all he ever wanted was to stay by my side."
Her voice cracked as the guilt weighed heavily in her chest. She felt undeserving of tears—because she wasn’t just a victim in her own story.
She had ruined him. And in doing so, she ruined herself.
"What are you saying, Jianyi?" Mother Qi’s brows furrowed, concern darkening her expression. "How bad could it have been for you to talk like you’ve lost him forever? What decision are you talking about? Why did it stop you from being with him? What do you mean by ’even until the end’?" Mother Qi struggled to piece together her daughter’s scattered confessions.
The way Jianyi spoke of Song Chengfeng—it was as if... he no longer existed. Qi Jianyi forced a smile. She had to. If she didn’t, the tears would start again.
"I love our family," she whispered. "I love my life."
The words puzzled Mother Qi even more. How did loving her family and cherishing her life have anything to do with losing the man she loved?
"I wanted to come home," Qi Jianyi said, turning her face away. She couldn’t look her mother in the eye. Not when the truth hurt this much. "I wanted to come home... so I hurt him."
"Qi Jianyi, what nonsense are you talking about?" Mother Qi’s voice rose slightly, anxiety creeping into her tone. Though her daughter’s words were vague, the feeling they left behind was unmistakable. Unease. Dread.
"Stop being vague and tell me clearly. No more riddles, Jianyi," she urged, a faint tremor in her voice. Qi Jianyi took a shaky breath and reached out, her fingers trembling as they gently wrapped around her mother’s hand.
"Seven years ago... after I finished my final exam, just before I was supposed to come home..." she paused, steadying herself. "I suddenly woke up in a different world."
Her voice was slow but unwavering now. She was done hiding. And so, for the first time, Qi Jianyi shared the truth—the impossible secret she had buried deep in her heart.
She told her mother everything: about how her soul had been swapped with another Qi Jianyi, about the unfamiliar world she found herself trapped in, and about how she lived someone else’s life with no idea how to return to her own.
Mother Qi gasped, her hand flying to her mouth. Her eyes widened as she struggled to comprehend what she had just heard. A full minute passed in stunned silence as the truth sank in—her daughter’s life had been stolen.
"I met him in that world," Qi Jianyi finally said, voice soft and laced with grief. "Song Chengfeng. He was He Zeqing’s friend. That’s how we met. We were just acquaintances at first, but then... we fell in love."
She shut her eyes, letting the tears fall freely.
"He knew, Mom. He knew I wasn’t the real Qi Jianyi of that world. But even with all that—he chose to stay. He didn’t care. He still chose me." Her voice broke as she turned to face her mother, shame swimming in her eyes.
"I used him. I used his feelings because I was scared. Because I didn’t know how else to survive without losing my mind. I clung to him even when I knew I would leave someday." She squeezed her mother’s hand as her voice dropped into a painful whisper. "I just wanted to come home. And through it all... he never blamed me. He just loved me. Even when he knew I would leave. Even when I did."
"I can’t even regret my decision because coming home, being with you, dad and Jianning is all I want. I love him. But I love you guys more. I was such a jerk wasn’t I?" She laughed between her tears, appearing more heart wrenching than she already was.