CHAPTER 54: DO WE NEED A REASON?

"I don’t understand the reason behind it," Qi Jianyi said, her voice calm, though her heart was anything but.

On the surface, she met Song Chengfeng’s gaze steadily, giving away nothing. But beneath that calm exterior, her mind raced, a thousand questions swirling like a storm. Why now? Why him? How had she landed in a situation where she had to fend off feelings she never anticipated?

Song Chengfeng’s response was no more reassuring than the silence before it.

"This kind of thing...do we even need a reason?" he muttered, almost to himself, as if testing the words on his own ears. He didn’t sound convinced, and Qi Jianyi certainly wasn’t either. His eyes flickered with uncertainty, a vulnerability he rarely let surface.

She studied him, her mind carefully sorting through the best way to dismantle this fragile moment.

"I’m not asking you to accept me," he said, more insistently now. "Won’t you at least consider me?"

Qi Jianyi drew in a deep breath, forcing herself to remain composed. He wasn’t making this easy. Song Chengfeng wasn’t the kind of man who begged for affection. He was collected, distant—yet here he was, asking her for something she couldn’t give, something she had no interest in giving.

"I don’t have the time for that," she finally said, her words deliberate, though there was an underlying edge of regret. "And I believe that this kind of thing always has a reason behind it."

She glanced at him, knowing her answer wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but it was the only truth she could offer.

"It’s not about whether I would consider you or not. I just have no interest in that kind of thing. So, young master Song, stop where you should—before you end up getting hurt." Her voice grew quieter, almost tender, but not enough to soften the blow.

It wasn’t an accusation. It wasn’t a warning either. It was a simple truth, one she knew he wasn’t ready to accept. Sometimes, she mused, the truth can be as sharp as a blade, and no matter how gently you try to wield it, it always leaves a mark.

Song Chengfeng’s expression barely changed, but Qi Jianyi could sense the weight of her words sinking in. His eyes, still steady, flickered with something that made her heart clench for a split second. It was the quiet realisation of rejection—not from a single moment, but from the gradual understanding that this was never going to end the way he had hoped.

How could she explain herself further? He wanted to talk about love and relationships, but how could she respond when everything in this world felt so... temporary?

Qi Jianyi let out a soft breath, her thoughts slipping into a familiar refrain. What does any of this matter? She didn’t belong here, in this world. No matter how real it felt, this was just a novel setting, a place where every conversation, every interaction was scripted for someone else’s entertainment.

She had no intention of playing along, no desire to indulge in a romance that had no future. She would leave, she would find her way back to her real world, to the life that was waiting for her beyond these pages and find the original Qi Jianyi.

And so, what was the use of talking about love with Song Chengfeng when she believed, deep down, that she would disappear from this place, from his life, sooner than he expected?

She couldn’t allow him to indulge in feelings that would only lead to heartbreak. If she did, it would only prolong the inevitable.

Better to sever the feelings now, before it had a chance to grow into something that would hurt him. She could see the sadness in his eyes, even if he refused to show it. But it was better this way. Better to let him down now, before any more damage was done.

Song Chengfeng remained silent, the weight of her words hanging between them. She wanted to get out of the car, to escape this suffocating tension, but something kept her rooted in place for just a moment longer.

"In your eyes, am I handsome?" Song Chengfeng cut through the intense atmosphere in the car with his sudden question.

Qi Jianyi tilted her head, confused. She couldn’t understand how her heartfelt advice was changed to a sudden bolt of questions about his look.

"Am I?" He questioned again upon seeing the confusion in Qi Jianyi’s eyes.

Not fully understanding the reason behind his question, Qi Jianyi could only nod her head honestly. Anyway, Song Chengfeng was indeed good looking.

"If you could rank me, what is my rank with my good looks?" A small playful smirk curved on his face as he asked that.

Qi Jianyi seriously pondered upon his question. Completely drifted her from their original solemn conversation.

She stared at his face carefully, analysing his face even in slightest detail.

Song Chengfeng’s skin, once deeply tanned from years in the sun, had lightened since his retirement, but it still held a faint bronze hue. His black hair was neatly kept, adding contrast to his slightly softened complexion.

Sharp, defined eyebrows framed his face, giving him a naturally intense look. But it was his eyes that stood out the most for Qi Jianyi—striking and commanding, as if they could see right through her, leaving a lasting impression with every glance.

Song Chengfeng was, without a doubt, the most good-looking man she had ever seen. Every feature seemed perfectly in place, from the cut of his jaw to the piercing depth of his gaze, radiating a quiet strength and elegance that made him impossible to ignore.

There was something about him that was both rugged and refined, a combination that left her momentarily breathless, as if she were staring at someone who belonged to a world apart from her own.

"You’re the first," Qi Jianyi said breathlessly, turning away from him as if the air between them had grown too heavy. She refused to admit how close she had come to being mesmerised by his presence. His striking looks were undeniable, but her pride wouldn’t allow her to acknowledge it aloud.

Song Chengfeng noticed the subtle shift in her tone, a proud smile creeping onto his face. He tried to maintain his usual composure, but the satisfaction was too obvious, breaking through the cracks of his stoic facade.

"Then that means I have a chance," he declared confidently, nodding his head in satisfaction, as though he had already won a victory.

Qi Jianyi tilted her head, eyebrows raised in disbelief. "What chance?"

Song Chengfeng didn’t hesitate, his shamelessness cutting through the air like a blade. "You think I’m good looking. That means I have a chance to woo you."

Qi Jianyi blinked, genuinely taken aback by his boldness. "What gives you that confidence?" She was bewildered—how could he be so sure of himself?

"The dramas on TV," he said without missing a beat. "The female lead always says no woman would reject a wealthy and good-looking man. Qi Jianyi, I’m both rich and handsome. I was a soldier, and in our world, we don’t have the word ’give up’ in our dictionary."

Qi Jianyi stared at him for a moment, both amused and exasperated by his logic. She didn’t know whether to laugh or roll her eyes at his audacity.

Who would have thought the retired soldier’s life was too boring to the point of believing anything that was said in the drama?

"You should watch less dramas. Lest you got influenced by them." Qi Jianyi sincerely advised.

"I won’t force you to accept me. So, at the same time. Don’t stop my feelings. I don’t have a reason now, and maybe I will never have a reason for what I feel right now." Song Chengfeng looked at her with a calm look, so calm that he managed to make Qi Jianyi nervous.

"Maybe in the future, you will understand this kind of thing, don’t even need a reason." He softly reminded her.

Love was something far too complicated for humans. For Qi Jianyi, love required an overwhelming reason to exist. It wasn’t some whimsical feeling that drifted aimlessly into people’s hearts.

No, there had to be a cause—a spark ignited by logic, circumstance, or fate. You needed a reason to love, to be in love, and to be loved in return. To her, it was a matter of inevitability, not coincidence.

However, Song Chengfeng’s view of love couldn’t have been more different. To him, love was undefined, a nebulous concept that refused to fit into neat categories or be confined by reason. You could never exactly point to what love was or explain why it appeared.

He had never been in love before, yet here he was, navigating unfamiliar emotions with the blind confidence of someone who wasn’t afraid to stumble along the way. He didn’t fully understand his feelings for Qi Jianyi, but did that matter?

Was it love at first sight? Or did he simply enjoy looking at her, being near her? No matter the cause, one thing was clear to him—this wasn’t boredom.

His feelings ran deeper than a fleeting distraction, and even if he couldn’t yet name them, the thought of Qi Jianyi rejecting him before he even had the chance to try felt wrong. It gnawed at him, a frustration that burrowed beneath his cool exterior.

It was as if she had denied him an opportunity before he could grasp it, leaving him with a lingering discomfort that was foreign to him. Being a man of action, Song Chengfeng wasn’t accustomed to the helplessness of not knowing how to respond, and it frustrated him to no end.

"I will wait," he said softly, though there was a quiet resolve behind his words. "After all, I have nothing else to do. Qi Jianyi, if there’s one thing I lack the least right now, it’s time. I have all the time in the world to wait for you to give me a chance."

His rough voice, usually so distant and commanding, held a softness, a tenderness that felt completely out of character. It was as though he had unintentionally peeled back a layer of himself, revealing something vulnerable beneath the surface.

For a moment, his words almost bewitched her, wrapping her in a spell she didn’t quite understand. Or perhaps she was simply too stunned to process what he had said at all.

By the time Qi Jianyi had gathered her thoughts, she was already inside her dorm. She couldn’t even recall what she had replied to him. All she knew was that Song Chengfeng’s words lingered in her mind like a question left unanswered.