CHAPTER 45: CHAPTER 45 HEARTBROKEN AND DRUNK

*CADEN*

“Actress, Alora Harper set to wed non-celebrity groom, on August 10th.”

I read and reread that headline over and over again unable to believe it.

No.

This couldn’t be true but the news spread, getting displayed on numerous news channel, even on TV.

Alora was getting married?!

I rushed into my car and headed for her house.

It was the early hours of the morning. I had been unable to bear seeing her on a date with another man and so I left yesterday.

And just this morning, news about her getting married in a week’s time was everywhere.

It had to be fake news.

I got to her house and ran up the stairs.

I pounded on the door of her room.

“Alora, it’s me. Open the door.” I just needed her to debunk this to me in person.

The door opened and she looked sleepy.

She rubbed her eyes.

“Caden, what’s urgent that you...”

“I saw the news, it’s fake, right? The news about your wedding?”

She stared up at me.”I’m getting married.”She informed me.

“To who?”

“You saw him yesterday.”

“You’re getting married to a guy you met yesterday?!”

“We’re getting married in a week’s time if that counts.”

“That isn’t enough time to...”

“Our moms are friends, he’s a good guy.”

I grabbed her shoulders.”Are you being forced to do this? Is someone threatening you?”

Someone had to be.

She couldn’t just get married just like this.

She tugged off my hands from her shoulders.

“I’m getting married because I want to. What’s it to you anyway? Why would you show up at my house so early to ask me this? Why are you so bothered by it? Do I even owe you an explanation. Whatever we had ended eight years ago, we have nothing to do with each other now.”

It felt as if I just got stabbed.

I nodded.”Right, we have nothing to do with each other.”

She angrily walked into her room and slammed the door on my face.

************

*ALORA*

After that day, I barely saw Caden. Hanks and Jerry were the ones following me around.

For some reason, I felt disturbed and I couldn’t understand why.

I felt bothered, I felt uneasy.

During the dress fitting, the joy on my mother’s face was palpable.

It made me feel that this was worth it.

I had almost lost my life twice recently. And I felt I hadn’t made my mother happy enough.

So I wanted to do that now. It’d only be for a month and then I’d go back to my normal life.

Someone once asked me what I was so afraid of, why was it so hard for me to let anyone in, to give a man a chance.

I guess, I had a thought impeded in my blood, a thought that love would ruin me.

I was scared of getting attached to someone and then all of a sudden, one day, you’re learning how to live without that person.

A lot of men made promises to be different, but I didn’t want to learn the hard way.

That was why I was so closed off.

So against letting my guards down.

Because I was scared it might cost me everything.

*****************

*CADEN*

It was the day before Alora’s wedding, before she weds another man.

I had been burying myself with work, giving myself little to no time to think about anything.

But tonight, I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

And so I was at the bar, drinking my feelings away.

“Man, I’ve been trying to reach you for days.”I glanced sideways to see Mason.

“You won’t pick my calls, your receptionist and security at your company strictly refused to let me in, claiming you weren’t accepting visitors at the moment. I was really worried about you.”

I guess I couldn’t hide anymore, might as well let him see how pathetic I was.

I continued to drink, ignoring him.

“Seeing how you look right now, I guess the news is true. Alora is getting married. Hanks had told me about the arrangement so far, the bridal store, I...I had refused to believe it. How could you let this happen?”

“Is there anything I can do about it?”

“Does she love the man she’s getting married to?”

“I don’t know. She met him a week ago.”

“Then maybe she’s getting married to him for another reason.”

I scoffed.”What other reason could she possibly have? Maybe she fell in love with him at first sight.” I let out, miserably.

“Why didn’t you tell her about how you feel about her? You could’ve told her you loved her!”

“And then what?”

“I saw you guys kissed, I thought...I thought you two were...”

“The kiss meant nothing to her. She said we have nothing to do with each other now.”

“I still think you should have told her your feelings.”

“And hear her reject me? I don’t think I could bear to hear her say she doesn’t love me. She doesn’t even have to say it now. I already know and that’s enough.” I grabbed the bottle and started to gulp it down.

Gosh, why was I tearing up right now?

I put down the bottle, I knew I was getting so drunk now.

I turned to face Mason.”I...I love her. I love Alora.”I admitted. “The past eight years has been very difficult and lonely. But thoughts about her kept me going. When I got out of jail, I thought it was pointless to go after her now, she was at the start of her career at that time and doing so well already, I didn’t want to be a bother. So I tried to move on from the feelings I had for her. But the loneliness and sadness didn’t go away. No matter how hard I tried to feel content, to feel happy, to fill the void inside of me, nothing could fill it. At some point, I didn’t even know what I was searching for. But in those years, you know what gave me a little glimpse of happiness, watching her shows, watching her movies and so when the opportunity came to be close to her again, I grabbed it. I didn’t want to force my way into her life. But I can’t deny how being close to her made me feel. I just don’t understand why she’s my only shot at happiness. She doesn’t even want me, yet, I keep wanting a life with her.”

Fuck! I was crying.

“I should go talk to her right now. I need to make her know everything you’ve done for her.”As Mason stood up, I grabbed his hand.

“No. She didn’t make me do anything.”

“These past weeks has been hectic for you, balancing your schedule, protecting her, managing your company, giving up...giving up that investment to go save her. She has to know.”

“She didn’t make me do it. I did it all on my own because I love her so you don’t have to make her feel bad for anything.”

“So you’re just going to give up, just like that?”

“I do not regret the last few weeks of protecting her. But to Alora, I’d always be that boy that played with her heart. I think it’s time to accept it and not bother her anymore.”

I didn’t know how long I drank that night but in a daze, I knew Mason was dragging me out of the bar.

“I...I’m not drunk. I can take more.”I heard myself saying.

“No, let’s go home, Caden. I’ll give you more alcohol at home.”

“Really?”

He nodded.

“Why do you have three heads?”

I shook my head, trying to stable my vision.

“I...I even ran a background check on her husband to be, I...I couldn’t find anything bad about him.”I laughed.”He...he isn’t a jerk like me. His records are clean. I even started to wish I had his life.”

I felt water on my face.

“Caden, it’s about to rain, let’s go.”

I pushed Mason away from me and knelt on the floor.

It started to rain heavily and my eyes started to rain too.

“I can’t even protect her anymore.”

I cannot ever show her up to her, I do not think I could bear seeing her with her husband.

I tried to tell myself that this was for the best.

But it hurts.

It fucking hurts.