Two and Half Men - Reborn as Jake Harper
Chapter 169: Another Lunch II
ire opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. She narrowed her eyes slightly, then blinked, clearly trying to find a retort—but failing. I did look fine. Too fine for someone who has drunk a lot.
Freshly showered, sharp-eyed, and with an easy smile, I leaned back in the chair like I had juste from a spa instead of one of the wildest nights.
She tilted her head and gave a suspicious look, like she was trying to solve a riddle that shouldn''t exist.
Phil leaned closer to ire and whispered, "He does look good, doesn''t he?"
ire gave him a quick re, but even she couldn''t argue.
Meanwhile, Paige had taken a seat next to Alex and was already whispering something that made Alex smirk.
Haley was seated right next to me with her sunsses still on, muttered something about regretting everything.
"About sleepy," I said as I stood up again, pointing toward Cam, Mitchell, and the rest. "Losers. Losers—only Phil stayed until the very end of the party."
Yeah, most had gone before 7 a.m.
Then Jay and Gloria appeared, prompting everyone to p.
"The newlyweds!" Cam shouted dramatically, making Haley wince beside me.
Gloria wore a bright, joyful expression and immediatelyunched into her loud voice to thank everyone. Jay stood beside her, a little grumpy, not as enthusiastic.
"Huh, you came," Jay said, looking at me—but with a surprisingly receptive smile.
"Jay, Jake is basically family," Gloria said loudly.
"You mean yours," Jay joked, clearly referring to me kissing both of Gloria''s nieces.
"Our," Gloria corrected. "Even Juan gave his blessing saying he is a buen muchacho/ goodd" she added, giving me a strange look.
"Who is Juan?" I leaned in, curious.
"My brother. He is not easy to impress, or to make a friend of," Gloria replied.
"Is he the one who looked like Pablo Escobar?" I added with a raised eyebrow.
"Jess, that one," Gloria nodded.
"No idea why he would be impressed by me." I lied, "Maybe I know how to charm Colombians," I smirked.
"Yeah, with that ego? Must''ve worked wonders between aguardiente shots," Paige said dryly, tossing a napkin at me without even looking.
Soon after, everyone began helping themselves to food. The table was full of chatter, forks scraping against tes, and the asional burst ofughter.
After a while, Haley—who had barely touched her food—turned to me and muttered, "How are you so fine? You drank more than me."
"Because you''re an amateur," I replied, shing a knowing grin. "First, don''t mix drinks if you don''t want a bad headache the next day. Second, make sure to drink water between rounds—it helps. Third, know your limits. Fourth, have a good meal before drinking. And to finish, some meds before and after drinks do wonders."
"Don''t worry, that bighead has a 195 IQ and still made the same mistakes," I said, pointing at Paige, which instantly made her re at me, annoyed.
"What he''s not saying," Paige jumped in, "is that the waitress was by his side all night, and she swapped his drinks for non-alcoholic ones during your little drinking games."
Haley gasped, and Gloria looked outraged. "Ay, you little fox!" she eximed.
"What? I saw you doing the same, Gloria," I shot back.
"I was the bride" said Gloria like that justified it
"Wait, so you two were drinking water while we got wasted?" Mitchell cut in, his tone rising with disbelief and clear indignation.
"Mitchell, I couldn''t possibly drink that much. Even my uncle couldn''t—and he''s a professional," I said. I had entered a lot of the games, making people get drunker by pretending to drink with them. (I was drunk, I didn''t fake all the time)
"Ay pero tell me," Gloria said, turning to me with a smile and that thick ent of hers. "Until what time did my party go, huh? Because I got a message at five-thirty saying people were still dancing—and the party was supposed to end by four at thetest!"
"7 a.m.," I replied. "But only me and Phil at this table were still going by then."
"How did you get that?" Jay asked, narrowing his eyes. "Did you pay for it?"
"Yepp, I paid for all of it since the groom had already left. I me Gloria''s family—they all know how to party," I replied.
"They do!" Gloria responded with augh.
"And today there is more, and tomorrow a great one" I said to Haley, making her groan, not the usual response you would expect for her
"So no one will said anything about a minor drinking?" Alex murmured, indignant
As the lunch went on, Paige began mischievously recounting embarrassing moments from the night before, one by one. Her voice was casual but teasing, clearly enjoying the reactions she stirred up. Alex, seated beside her, asionally chimed in with extra details, often making the stories even worse. Together, they formed a merciless duo of memory recall, and no one at the table was truly safe from theirmentary.
They eventuallynded on ire. "Oh, and let''s not forget ire," Paige began, grinning wickedly. "Dancing on the table with a champagne bottle like it was a microphone?"
Alex nodded, adding, "And yelling ''I still got it!'' right before almost knocking over the new cake."
ire groaned and dropped her face into her hands. "Can we not? That cake was in a terrible spot."
After moreughter and teasing stories, the lunch began winding down. One by one, everyone started leaving early, still feeling the effects of the night before. I headed back home and crashed into bed, only waking up again at 8 p.m.
That night, the group began gathering at my ce—Cher, Regina, Carly, Freddie, Sam, and of course, Paige.
"It is party time!" Cher dered enthusiastically, throwing her hands in the air.
The energy was contagious. The rest of the group cheered back with matching excitement, ready to start the night all over again.
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