CHAPTER 141: RUNAWAY FEELINGS

Trixtan could not believe his ears as he stared at Shade, his jaw slack, a profound, disbelieving look on his face. ’This dude. When did he become this smooth?’ he thought in awe, a new respect for the young man blooming in his heart. The audacious, confident, and utterly unexpected confession was a surprise. He had always seen Shade as a cold, brooding, and distant figure, but now, in a single, terrifying, and beautiful moment, a new side of him had been revealed. A side that was confident, a side that was... romantic.

Eirin, her face a flaming red, the color of a ripe cherry, stood up with a sudden, panicked motion, causing everyone to look at her. All eyes, a curious light, were now fixed on her, a frightening spotlight that made her want to disappear.

The air was thick with unspoken questions, with knowing glances, and she couldn’t take it anymore. The words, a frantic, disorganized torrent of panic, spilled from her lips.

"I-I’ll go now. Coleen might be searching for me now. I don’t want to worry her."

Shade’s dark eyes fixed on her as he stood as well, his movements a graceful, silent, and utterly unnerving motion that made her heart race. "I’ll go with you." He didn’t wait for anyone to react as he followed Eirin, his voice a low, commanding murmur that was meant only for her. "Wait for me, Luxfield."

Eirin couldn’t even look back due to the overwhelming embarrassment as she rushed out of the cafeteria, her body a small, frantic blur of motion. She wove through the crowded halls, her feet a fast, hurried rhythm against the polished stone, the chaotic energy of the academy a blur around her. Her cheeks were hot, a burning warmth that spread on her ears and neck, and she was terrified.

"What’s the rush?"

Shade’s voice came from right behind her, a casual easy presence that was a brutal contrast to her inner panic.

With a sudden sharp motion, Eirin turned around, her face still heating up, her eyes wide with disbelief. "Why would you say such things to them?" she whispered, her voice a small, panicked sound. She covered her face in a mortified gesture, her hands a futile attempt to hide from the terrifying reality of the moment.

"How am I going to face them now? What are they going to think?"

Shade tilted his head, a curious look on his face, as if genuinely didn’t understand her reaction. "What did I say? Was it something wrong? I was just telling them the truth."

The way he acted so clueless, so unbothered, left Eirin in a state of disbelief. She looked at him with eyes wide, her jaw slack.

"Y-You!"

The word, a small, frustrated squeak, was all she could manage. With a frustrated gasp, she ran away, her body a frantic, panicked blur of motion, making Shade run after her, his long, powerful strides a horrifying, easy rhythm behind her.

"Stop chasing me!"

Eirin screamed, her voice a desperate plea that was lost in the vast, open space of the academy.

"Then stop running away from me."

Eirin could hear Shade’s laughter from behind, a low melodic sound that was filled with amusement and excitement, but the anxiety of being chased, of being hunted, didn’t sit well with her. Her lungs were burning, a painful fire, her legs a tired, weary ache, and her heart was a wild, fierce drum against her ribs. She didn’t know why she was running, where she was going, but knowing Shade was chasing after her made her desperate to get away, she had to escape that confession that hung in the air between them.

"Stop chasing me!"

Eirin’s words was a desperate cry, her final futile protest. The two chased each other till they reached the training ground, a vast, open space of green grass and bulky trees. They were exhausted and out of breath, their lungs heaving, their bodies a tired, spent thing. Eirin couldn’t hold herself anymore as she sat on the ground, her body a defeated lump. The cool, soft grass was a comforting balm against her hot, tired skin.

"Are you okay?"

Shade’s voice, a soft, gentle murmur, came from right beside her.

Eirin, her head a confused mess, turned to Shade after he had the audacity to ask her than when he was the reason why she was exhausted and defeated. Her eyes filled with a disbelieving look, were a direct, furious stare.

"Is it normal for you to chase someone like that? To corner them like a wild animal?"

Shade tilted his head, a curious look on his face. "Wouldn’t you feel the urge to chase someone seeing them running away after they saw your face?"

The words, so simple and yet so great, made her flinch. His answer made sense and confused her at the same time, a dizzying vertigo that was a new experience for her.

"Then, if someone you don’t know starts running away from you, would you chase after them?"

"No. I’m not interested in them."

Shade’s words, a cod, blunt, and utterly honest confession, were a new kind of pain and a new kind of hope. His eyes, a dark, intense light, landed on Eirin, a knowing stare.

"Let me change my answer. I chased after you because it was you. You were the one running away from me."

Eirin was left speechless. The air, though filled with the soft, gentle rustling of leaves and the distant chirping of birds, felt like a suffocating void. The casual, easy confession was a blow that left her breathless, stunned, and terrified.

"You... do you really like me? Romantically?"

The question, a soft, small whisper, was a plea for him to deny it, for him to take it all back.

"Why? Is it unbelievable?"

Eirin, her heart a wild drum against her ribs, nodded, a quick, jerky motion that was filled with amusement as he mutters, "Cute," a single, soft word that made Eirin blush, that same flaming red that spread from her neck to her cheeks as she moved away from him, her body flinching.

"T-That! Don’t say things like that!" she stammered, her voice a small, panicked protest.

Shade raised a brow, a playful light in his eyes. "Things like what?" He acted as if he doesn’t know just to see the flustered expression on Eirin’s face, mask of confusion. His gaze, a warm, loving light.

"A-Anyway! If you truly and genuinely like me, I’m sorry. I can’t reciprocate your feelings for me. I... I’m not ready for that. I don’t think I’m capable of that."

Eirin swallowed a huge slump in her throat, her body a tight, coiled spring of nerves, terrified of what Shade’s reaction would be. She expected anger, hurt, a cold, brutal indifference, anything but the calm, and unreadable expression on his face.

"Do you like Pierre?"

The question, so direct and unexpected, was a jarring interruption to her emotional spiral.

Eirin immediately shook her head, a violent, panicked motion. "No! Nothing like that. He’s a great friend, but I don’t see him in that light. He’s more like a big brother to me."

"Then, do you have someone else you like? Is there someone else you like?" Shade asked, his voice a gentle murmur, but his dark eyes held a piercing gaze that was a direct demand for the truth.

Eirin’s mind stopped for a moment as Shade asked that. The image of his face, his dark eyes, his emotionless face, flashed through her head. But at the back of it, a distant memory, she remembered her friend, Bright Goodwin. The only boy she used to talk to, the one she liked, a quiet, gentle boy who was now far away from her.

"No, no one like that."

The words, though true in a sense, felt like a small, meaningless lie in the face of his intense stare. Eirin smiled, a sad, yet beautiful smile, remembering the innocent moments she had with Bright and Ava.

"And by the way, I’m only sixteen. There’s enough time for me to find someone I like. Right now, I want to focus on my training, on figuring things out."

Shade smiled, a sincere smile that grew wider as he continued staring at Eirin. He ruffled Eirin’s hair, a soft, intimate gesture, as if he usually does that, but it left Eirin speechless, a flustered look on her face. The casual, easy affection was a new kind of intimacy that she was not ready for.

"That’s right. You should focus more on your training. You’ll make your teacher, me, proud."

Eirin’s mouth hung open as she observed Shade’s face. He doesn’t look like he’s lying about what he said. There was no anger, no hurt, no cold indifference, just honesty.

"You’re not made? You’re not... upset that I don’t like you back?"

"You don’t have to worry about that."

Eirin’s forehead creased. "What?"

"I didn’t say I like you for you to like me back," Shade said, flicking Eirin’s forehead. "My feelings are my own." He smiled as he rubbed Eirin’s forehead for her.

"But I should apologize. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that without your permission. I shouldn’t have put you on the spot like that."