Chapter 142 - Speech before the LOLICON

I only caught a fleeting glimpse of the Capital Exestia from outside, but even that brief moment was enough to leave an impression. Just beyond the towering steel gates lay an expansive field, bustling with activity. 

VTOL aircraft and gleaming space shuttles stood parked in organized rows, their hulls reflecting the amber glow of the early dawn. Rising far in the distance, and yet still dominating the skyline, was the colossal Archonlight Tower. Its sheer size was humbling, a steel-and-glass monolith that loomed like the spine of a god, even from kilometers away.

The air buzzed with urgency. Dozens of WAIFUs in tactical uniforms dashed back and forth across the tarmac, their movements swift and precise. Some were directing hover-loaders, others were carrying crates of ammunition and supplies, and all of them had the intensity of soldiers preparing for war. One by one, the VTOLs roared to life and ascended into the morning sky, carrying Vanguard reinforcements destined to clash with the relentless hordes of Cosmic Beasts.

Jet engines howled like wild beasts, and the rhythmic chop of rotor blades clashed against the backdrop of shouted orders and blaring sirens. The whole scene vibrated with kinetic energy, chaotic, deafening, alive. At one point, Fei narrowly avoided getting run over by a speeding 4x4 transport truck.

“Eeek!” she squeaked, stumbling back.

“Watch out, Fei.” Myrrh reacted instantly, grabbing Fei’s wrist and yanking her out of harm’s way.

“T-thank you, Myrrh… I guess I’m just really tired. Been tripping over myself all morning,” Fei murmured, bowing apologetically with a flustered smile. "I'm sorry for being clumsy tonight."

“You’re always a klutz,” I said, only half-teasing.

We continued to follow a maid WAIFU, weaving through the chaos until we arrived at a peculiar-looking ship. Unlike the standard-issue black and gunmetal vessels surrounding it, this one was painted in an elegant blend of white and sky-blue. It had the same aerodynamic silhouette as a Land Orbital Logistics Interceptor—one commonly used by KAWAII for space missions—but something about it stood out. Attached to either side were two massive cylindrical fuel tanks, each paired with oversized thrusters that looked powerful enough to punch through a planet’s stratosphere.

Inside the hangar, a flurry of activity unfolded. Dozens of maid WAIFUs, most likely high-ranking SENPAIs judging by their ornate uniforms and confident demeanor, were busily moving crates onto transport platforms. Their movements were efficient, graceful even, like a perfectly choreographed ballet of logistics. Among them, a single towering Frame Unit worked silently, its hydraulic limbs delicately lifting entire stacks of cargo as if they weighed nothing.

In the midst of this mechanical elegance, a flash of familiar color caught my eye. A pink-haired woman stood among the maids, her presence impossible to ignore.

“Agent Feena!” Myrrh called out, raising her hand in greeting.

The woman turned, her long pink ponytail trailing behind her like a silk ribbon caught in the wind. Her expression softened as she spotted us. With clipboard in hand and a sharp gleam in her eyes, Agent Feena looked every bit the composed veteran she was. Myrrh, Fei, and I quickened our pace to meet her.

She gave us a once-over, her gaze briefly pausing on me, then shifting to Fei. “You’re early,” she said with a hint of surprise. “How did you manage to reach Exestia in just thirty minutes?”

“We had help from our friends,” Myrrh replied with a small nod, then turned her attention to the spacecraft behind Agent Feena. Her eyes widened slightly in awe. “What is this?”

Agent Feena’s lips curled into a proud smile. She gestured toward the vessel beside her, a sleek, pristine structure in white and gold. “This is the Kaiserin’s Land Orbital Logistics Interceptor, enhanced with a Celestial Optimization Nexus,” she announced, her voice brimming with pride. “It’s currently the fastest ship in Exestia’s fleet… and we’ll be using it to invade that.”

She raised her finger and pointed skyward.

“It’s magnificent, isn’t it?” came a sweet, familiar voice—soft, yet brimming with pride. “That ship is equipped with state-of-the-art technology. It can travel at one one-hundredth the speed of light.”

We turned toward the voice, and there she was: the adorable menace in royal garb, Her Excellency Kaiserin Grace Arcaliburn. The petite sovereign stood with practiced poise, draped in white-and-gold regalia embroidered with cosmic sigils. 

Her golden crown sparkled under the hangar lights—ornate, delicate, and, if my instincts were correct, probably molded from real 24-karat gold. The temptation to snatch it off her tiny head and sell it on the galactic black market hit me like a meteor, but I blinked it away. Barely.

“Your Excellency!” Myrrh exclaimed, her voice tinged with admiration.

“Good evening, Myrrh Alicent. And you as well, Miss Fei Xian.” the Kaiserin said with a dainty wave, the kind you’d see in a beauty pageant—slow, graceful, and clearly rehearsed. Then her sharp eyes landed on me. “Nice to see you again, goon.”

That word. Goon. Like nails on a chalkboard. I felt my brow twitch.

“What’s with this sassy lost child?” I barked, pointing dramatically at her.

CRACK.

Pain exploded in my foot as Myrrh’s heel came down hard. “Be nice!” she snapped, her eyes flashing with disapproval. “Show some respect, you hoodlum!”

“OW!” I yelped, hopping in place. 

The Kaiserin let out a musical giggle, clearly entertained by our ongoing comedy routine. But just as quickly, her smile sharpened into something more resolute. She looked up at us with the air of a sovereign ready for war.

“Now then,” she said, voice cool and commanding. “Is the preparation for the LOLICON complete?”

“Fuel tank is already at ninety-seven percent capacity, Your Excellency,” reported one of the SENPAI WAIFU maids, bowing with practiced elegance.

“Excellent,” the Kaiserin nodded. “Big Sis Feena, I’m entrusting the mission briefing to our heroines.”

“As you wish, Your Excellency,” Agent Feena responded, dipping into a respectful curtsy of her own.

I never expected the Kaiserin to carry such gravitas. Up close, her size and youthful appearance gave her the image of a pampered noble kid playing dress-up, but now… now she moved like someone born to command. She had an innate presence—sassy, yes, but undeniably magnetic. She barked orders and the most elite WAIFUs obeyed without hesitation. It hit me then: maybe I’d been underestimating her all this time. Maybe, just maybe, I’d been disrespecting someone truly dangerous.

The Kaiserin’s attention shifted to Myrrh.

“Myrrh Alicent,” she said solemnly, “I entrust you with this task—destroy that planet. You carry the legacy of Mirana Alicent within you. I believe in your strength. I know you can do it.”

Myrrh bowed, placing one hand across her chest. “Consider it done, Your Excellency. For me, that’s just a basic skill.”

The Kaiserin gave a small, approving smile before turning to Fei.

“And you, Miss Fei Xian,” she continued, her voice softening with a hint of respect. “You are a noble WAIFU of the OTAKU. Your courage today will echo across your bloodline. When this war ends, I will personally see that your clan is honored.”

Fei blinked, flustered by the recognition. “Y-you honor me, Y-Your Excellency! I-I will do my best!” She bowed low, her words trembling with humility, though a small flicker of pride lit up in her eyes.

And then… the Kaiserin turned to me.

“And you, Mister Goon,” the Kaiserin said, that sly smirk never leaving her lips.

“It’s Zaft. Zaft Callahan,” I corrected, trying to keep a shred of dignity intact. I forced my mouth to form the words, as awkward as they were. “Y-your Excellency.”

“I’m still calling you Goon,” she replied sweetly, like it was a royal decree. Her innocent smile didn’t match the weight of her next words. “You possess the power of the Archonlight. It may be artificial… but right now, you're the only one who can save this planet—no, all of humanity.”

Before I could respond, she reached out and touched my left wrist with her gloved right hand.

And then something strange happened.

Her arm began to glow, not with mechanical activation, not with any tech interface I could recognize, but with radiant, ethereal circuits of soft blue light. The luminous lines pulsed gently as they slid from her fingertips into my skin, weaving their way up my forearm like digital vines. It wasn’t just cosmetic; I could feel them. The light didn’t burn or sting—it was warm. Comforting. Like the first rays of sunlight after a long, bitter night.

It was nothing like the crimson circuits I had felt before, which seared like a live wire on my nerves. This… this felt alive, but kind. And yet, it was still powerful.

Then the WEEB System triggered without me even touching a thing.

[Weaponry Enhancement Engineering Bios]

[Master Clearance Link Success]

[Weapon of Mass Destruction Unlocked]

My mouth fell slightly open. “H-huh? W-wait, are you—?”

“Good luck, First Apostle of Mechanoss,” the Kaiserin said, her tone laced with reverence. “Show the Cosmic Goddess that this reality belongs to us… and us alone.”

She smiled at me—genuinely, without mockery this time—and my breath caught in my chest. For a moment, the teasing monarch disappeared. What I saw was something deeper, warmer.

For the first time… the Kaiserin didn’t feel like a bratty ruler towering above me.

For the first time… she felt like an ally.

And maybe, just maybe, I was starting to believe in her too.